"You can't be autistic..."

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I went to the dentist, and the hygienist came in and started talking at me. She paused and looked at my chart. "You have autism?"

"Yeah."

"Well, then it's the mildest Asperger's I've ever seen."

1. You're a dental hygienist! Even if you were a psychiatrist or something, you've been in the room with me for all of 2 minutes.

2. Actually, I don't have Asperger's, and I'm not what you'd call "mild".

3. I wanted to say... "And what do you expect that I would do if I were autistic?" Because, you know, the stimming, lack of eye contact, and inability to follow the conversation couldn't do it. Oh no.

Anyone else get this from the "experts"?

she probably either accidently said aspergers instead of autism or she was confused and thought since aspergers is in the autism spectrum everyone with autism had it and vice versa

I'd almost be willing to money on 'Well, you can talk..."

By all means, next time let the snarky questions/comments fly. Just say it with a smile. A big one. They don't know what to do with those...

"why yes i do have autism *huge smile here* why do you ask?

that will REALLY creep them out........i'm gonna do that one time

My words aren't very reliable, especially if it's new ones. I just don't think fast enough But oh, how I wish I could be snarky, verbally.

Last edited by SuperTrouper on 28 Apr 2011, 2:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.

She's a boob

I think the comment was ignorant but not snarky.

Practice in advance. It's what I did and still do constantly. If I get into a conversation and come up with a good comeback a little too late I replay it in my head with all kinds of inflections and expressions. In my head it's like casting some movie star to play me - I think of a character or actor I particularly like, or that fits the feel I'm going for and I try it out in the scene in my head. And I practice it. I do this alot whewn I'm alone in the car, freely talking to myself. (I really look forward to those car trips!)

Years of this has given me a pretty big library of spur of the moment responses. The snark and sarcasm came naturally after the 'what to say' part was conquered.

Can't hurt to try. Practice does make perfect. Or at least as close to perfect as it needs to be to pass for natural!

This is good advice, and actually, it´s what I do too. Unfortunately, once I practice something and finally have a ready-made reply to a certain question or comment, people cease to make that question or comment! It´s almost like, as soon as I´m prepared, there´s no use for it anymore. And then, people will surprise me with a new question or comment, which I have no comeback for. So my reaction to almost anything unexpected is just silence and a bland, blank face.

God I hate when NTs need to point out EVERYTHING!

Last time I was at the dentist they were trying to talk my head off nonstop, while my mouth was completely open and getting cleaned. I was being asked questions about myself nonstop during the whole process and my mind is screaming "lady, do you not realize that I can't even talk while my mouth is being forced open?!"

This is totally not meant to be a "those dumb NTs" post. I don't believe in "us" versus "them." This was an isolated circumstance of something one person did. She may as well have ASD, for all I know, too. But just like I am unqualified to comment on her neurological status, she is equally as unqualified to comment on mine.

Why do dentists want to make small talk while their hand is jammed in your mouth?

I seriously hate the dentist anyway as they make me extremely anxious.

I get told that by a lot of people and it drives me crazy. Hello! Most people on the spectrum are able to speak!

I would have said something like "well, obviously you don't know what you are talking about." And if I were feeling courageous, I would have gone as far to say something like "please don't make such ignorant comments".

It sounds as if she was very rude.
I mean, how would she like it if you had asked her about her weight or her big nose?

I get the opposite mostly. I had to go to the emergency room a few months ago and the nurse people were all overly nice to me and they put me in this room in a corner away from the noise. This one lady kept coming in to check on me who, as she said, "Has a son like me".

Sorry your hygienist was so rude and ignorant. I know a lot of people in situations like that only deal with kids on the spectrum though. Not that kids are more visibly autistic or something, but I imagine that going to the dentist would be more intimidating to a child than an adult and would therefore a child might be more likely to act in an agitated way. I think of my own daughter (who is not on the spectrum) who screams in the dental chair so loud you can hear her in the waiting room. Kids freak out sometimes, is all I mean. I am not trying to excuse the hygienists behavior, but maybe that is her problem. Maybe she just had some kid on the spectrum flip out on her so she made some silly snap assumption about aspergers. Shame on her.