People tell me a lot that I speak too loudly. Its my natural voice.
Few years ago my councelor told me that, apart from speaking too loud, I also speak too fast. And he gave me an exercize to speak slowly and softly. I noticed that when I speak slowly and softly my muscles of my tongue get tired real fast, I can't say more than few sentences without needing a break. But when I speak loud and fast I can speak on and on and on for an hour without any break. Kind of reminds me of a gym when lifting weight slowly takes a lot more effort than just lifting it fast.
However, when I mentioned this to my mom, she told me that she has seen me speaking quiet and slow without having to put any effort. She says that if I am relaxed then I can do it naturally and the problem, from her point of view, is that I am often not relaxed. So then the instance of forcing myself to speak quiet would be like a double-tension: on the one hand I am tense which causes me to speak loud on the first place and, on the other hand, I am tensing up in order to force myself to speak quietly?
But in any case, thats my mom's perspective that I am always tense. I don't see it that way. To me it seems like I can be totally relaxed and still talk loud. I think the instances when I speak quiet is (a) if I am really tired and (b) if I am being forced to say something I don't want to (such as my mom reminds me to say hello, please and thank you and then points out to me how I say it too quietly when I say everything else too loudly). Speaking of being tired, my mom disagrees with me, she seems to think that if I don't have enough sleep thats when I speak too loud. I have no idea how that could be the case though, it seems like her observations are biased. The way I see it is that I get loud if I find the topic of what I am trying to say interesting and feel eager to say it.
By the way my mom also says I eat too fast and constantly tries to slow me down when I eat. She said that I am tense when I eat fast, and I told her no I am not tense its my natural way of eating; I get tense when she tells me to eat slow.
P.S. I go to university to a different state than where my mom lives. But right now, since university became distant due to COVID, I moved in with my mom, and thats why I have all those conflicts.