I didn't seek diagnosis

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I didn't seek diagnosis.

I see problems stemming from my autism as balanced by good things my brain can do.

I wouldn't seek diagnosis.

My mum chose through my primary school days to not seek diagnosis for autism for me. She'd known a severely autistic, LFA woman to whom autism was a problem. My autism isn't like that.

She focused on me being myself outside of my dyspraxia. She focused on getting my dyspraxia 'cured'/treated (can't cure it yet, sadly) and she spent the rest of the time looking for a small school.

Unfortunately for religious reasons the only small secondary in the area rejected me. So she was put into a position where she had to choose whether to pathologise me or let me be eaten alive. Not all personality types can handle big secondary schools - in fact there's a reason why private/public secondaries have such small class sizes & it's because big classes aren't ideal for anyone. But she couldn't afford to send me private (let alone public lol - I'm not royalty).

So she sent me to a state school with a diagnosis & a TA.

Am I glad she did that part of it? Honestly, yes. She had no choice & my TA would listen to me talking about specialist interests & help with my dyspraxia & focus my attention at clubs the school had to offer (I like to think I'd have found those anyway) which meant I didn't have to bore myself in the yard during break. Year 7 was the year that break became boring.

Then she shifted me to a crap school. This was when she told me about being autistic. When I was being bullied. The only thing my diagnosis meant was that I stood out even more against the chavs I had nothing in common with & my stupid teacher put me in a bottom set despite me having top SATs results. Just because I was 'special needs'

I wouldn't seek out a diagnosis now if I was undiagnosed for autism. The only issues I have regarding autism & my lifestyle at present are mostly covered in my social anxiety diagnosis. The other issue I have is my light sensitivity. I don't think opticians would turn away an NT who needed dark glasses.

Quite a good deal of what has been pathologised & treated as odd about me, I like about myself and don't want to change and I wish medical language wouldn't be used towards it.

So it just becomes a stigma, an allowance of people to change me and a way for negative Nancies/people like my mother's friend with genuine needs, to say 'we're the same, isn't it awful'.

No. It's not. I like my brain just how it is, thank you.

Taking away asperger's was the final straw.

Do you feel gypped about your diagnoses?

You make a good case for avoiding diagnosis, if possible, til later in life. I was diagnosed at age 64 and am hardheaded enough that I think it just an interesting side-note; diagnosis before I was 30 would likely have been very unpleasant--worse than just being odd.

P.S. If you were officially diagnosed as having Asperger's Syndrome then my understanding is that is still your diagnosis. I don't think the DSM change is retroactive to diagnoses from before the change.

Without the racist language, I feel like it put a label on me which was negative.

And honestly?

My school report from the year I had my diagnosis is very similar to my statement. Except everything is negative (not an insult, just a pathology) in the statement and my teacher loved me except I was a bit quiet.

So my teacher was writing all about this studious little kid who read everything put in front of them and had conversations beyond their years & used clever language.

My statement was all about this weird patient who had obsessions & used overly formal language.

What it boils down to is the same things - except labelled in different contexts.

He wanted me to demonstrate my intelligence out loud in class. I did go onto doing that in other classes but the trouble is that teachers didn't always appreciate it. They end up saying 'anyone else got an answer'. That was my only failing as far as he was concerned - that and things which can be described via dyspraxia like I was a clumsy kid with crap handwriting who couldn't catch a ball.

Hmm I think I'll just call myself aspie then.

Also is the DSM just an American thing rather than world wide? I'm from the UK. It might still be considered Asperger's here.

Yeah I agree - I wouldn't go so far as 30 but certainly it should be an adult decision as to whether someone wants to be considered odd vs disabled. I don't mind if certain people consider me 'odd' - I gravitate more towards quiet, artistic types anyway.

My dyspraxia diagnosis actually benefited me as a kid. I went from being a 2 yo kid who couldn't eat solids or speak properly to a 4 yo kid who could do all that. And even the stuff I could never do, I improved on through physio. Mum thought of it as 'part of you is dyspraxia, the rest of you is you'.

If you find a definitive answer to that question I would love to hear it. The best I can say is that DSM might be primarily an American thing. Certainly that Wikipedia article suggests that, and I found these two items that seem relevant but do not really answer the question:

1. Quora: "Are there countries in which references other than the DSM are used for psychological diagnosis?"

2. APA: "ICD vs. DSM"

This Verywell Health item seems to indicate countries which use the more widely accepted ICD will, in 2022, also adopt the Autism Spectrum Disorder "umbrella" diagnosis: "Asperger's Syndrome Is No Longer an Official Diagnosis."

Aspergers101 put out this article which, perhaps unfortunately, draws some material from Autism Speaks "Aspergers & DSM-5" which also sees the overlap.

My understanding is:

1. If your country does not use DSM then Asperger's Syndrome and Autism are separate diagnosis and you have one diagnosis or the other. (But maybe things change in 2022?)

2. If your country does use DSM but you were diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome before 2013 then your official diagnosis is still Asperger's Syndrome but you now also are on the Autism Spectrum.

And, even though I was diagnosed in the U.S. after 2013, I can claim both because my personal psychological assessment specifically said  I  met the criteria for Autism Spectrum Disorder and also the criteria for Asperger's Syndrome.

The ICD is sometimes used in the US, too. Usually by more “medically” oriented organizations.

The ICD-10 has Asperger’s. The ICD-11 probably will not.

I didn't seek diagnosis either. I just wasn't a well behaved kid, so i got it slapped on me after one of their "evaluations".