Is too much behavior blamed on autism?

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I can think of some behaviors I had as a child which I was told was caused by my autism, but I later realized are actually normal childhood behaviors. I just grew out of them later than usual. For example, it's normal for little kids to have trouble understanding other people's perspectives. As helpful as a formal diagnosis can be, I feel like it also leads to autistic children's behavior being overpathologized.

Can't delays like that still be caused by autism, though?

Small children do have issues with things like understanding other people's perspectives, but autism is a developmental disorder. If a child's development in understanding things like that is noticeably delayed it could certainly be due to autism.

A lot of kids with autism partake in normal childhood behaviours, but do them for way too long or never outgrow them.

One cause may be rooted in Factitious Disorder Imposed on Another (FDIA) (also known as Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy, or MSbP) -- a condition in which a caregiver creates the appearance of health problems in another person, typically their child.  This may include injuring the child or altering test samples.  They then present the person as being sick or injured.  The behavior occurs without a specific benefit to the caregiver.  Permanent injury or death of the child may occur as a result of the disorder.

I have to wonder how many allegedly autistic children were diagnosed that way at the insistence of their parents.

"Oh, my poor child ... autism, you know ... the pain and suffering I must bear ... you have no idea how hard it is ..."

Meanwhile, the child is deprived of a normal childhood so that one or both parents can play the martyr and receive compassion and support for what they are going through.

I would be very very hesitant to put the blame on Munchausen by Proxy. I have seen Munchausen overused as a diagnosis when a person has an odd set of very legitimate medical symptoms that are just not common. Getting a false diagnosis of Munchausen can be seriously detrimental to a person's health and their ability to seek proper medical treatment.

There is a huge difference in a parent misinterpreting their child's symptoms and pushing for a diagnosis, even if it turns out that the diagnosis isn't accurate, and a parent deliberately causing physical and psychological harm to their child as a result of their own disorder. There is even a very big difference between a parent seeking attention because of their child's real or perceived symptoms and deliberately causing the symptoms.

Yes Munchausen in its different forms is very real and concerning, but I highly doubt it's the most common explanation for a parent seeking out a diagnosis or sympathy for a diagnosis for their child.

I think that way too many behaviours are blamed on autism, especially engaging in special interests, resistance to change and meltdowns.

I think a parent would only do that if they were having troubles with their child and their kid was also struggling.

I feel like my entire personality was pathologised including things which I'd previously received praise for.

Some kids read a lot. That's a good thing.

But it's on my statement as obsessive behaviour.

All children are born without language, without theory of mind, without emotional control and some other traits that can to varying extent be observed in some autistic people. A newborn wouldn't function well as an adult, but they also are not expected to. Just because something is normal at some developmental stage doesn't mean it can't be a symptom of a psychological condition if it lasts longer than in normally developing children. People are generally expected to function at an age-appropriate level.

Of course not all NT children develop at exactly the same pace either. Therefore a child could be a year or two behind at some things without having any psychological condition. And not every trait of an autistic person has to be an autism symptom. Behaviors not directly related to autism could be mistaken as being caused by autism. Autism might be used as an excuse for behavior an autistic child could regulate just as well as their NT peers. Or adults may pathologize a child's perfectly normal, age-appropriate behavior because they don't like it and blame it on autism.

However, traits that are common among autistic people of a certain age, but not common for NT people of the same age are probably in some way related to autism. Either they are directly symptoms of autism or indirectly correlated via comorbidities or experiences. They could still be overpathogolized if they are not detrimental, if the child will outgrow them on their own or if the attempts to treat them cause more harm than good. But that doesn't mean autism isn't the cause.

This is one of the many reasons why it needs to be acknowledged that, for many of us, autism entails strengths as well as disability.