Is being secretive an aspie trait or not?

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I find myself to be very secretive about myself, I never want to share my personal ambitions, beliefs, problems or anything with anybody friends or family (At least a lot of the time but not always). I often thought maybe it is unrelated to the fact that I am an aspie but I was watching this documentary about Sir Isaac Newton who many believe was possibly on the autistic spectrum and they were going on about not only how reclusive he was but also how secretive he was about his scientific breakthroughs as well as his alchemy ( which was illegal so he had reason to be secretive). Of course nobody knows for sure if he were autistic or not but it made me think well if he were an aspie or autie does that mean being secretive is common amongst others on the spectrum. And so that is the question that has brought me here.

I believe it is common (I am also secretive myself), and I believe I understand why we are secretive.

See, on the one hand, what means most to an NT is (typically) the group/pack to which that NT belongs. In order to fit into that group/be accepted in that group, that NT will have to share about himself, because the rest of the group/pack demand to know his social status to be included in that group. Otherwise the pecking order, group hierarchy and group order cannot be established properly, which is necessary for strong and coherent group dynamics.

On the other hand, what means most to someone with Asperger Syndrome is (typically) not mainly some group to which that person belongs. What essentially means most to someone with Asperger Syndrome is his individuality (this does not mean AS people do not want company! They just require to be treated properly/not exposed to peer pressure). So people with AS have no natural reason to want to expose information about themselves. In fact, people with AS could have an interest in being secretive about information about themselves, because revealing too much about themselves could expose their individuality to harm in a group setting.

So I think being secretive is a very natural choice for someone with AS.

Good point qawer thanks for the response.

I'm glad you found it useful.

I too am quite secretive (and on the spectrum). However, I view it as a protectionist measure, rather than a choice. Growing up I became accustom to getting picked on if I shared anything, so now I just don't share anything. It's unfortunate to say that there are things I don't even share with my partner. Trust me, I want to, but I just can't bring myself to for a number of reasons.

So whilst I don't know whether it's a trait as such, I do think that it's common as a protectionist measure.

Interesting. I've always looked at those on the spectrum as not being secretive. I say that because spectrumites tend not to lie. Some are even naïve to the point they open themselves up for ridicule and derision. Those are the ones who get taken advantage of very often. I, myself, am not that secretive. If no one is offended I'd gladly tell them about my mental health and other issues.

Not sharing stuff is an ASD symptom, but I think it's more of just not thinking of doing it.

Hardly. There are Aspie who are wide open and blabber mouths to boot. And there are NTs who keep a lot of things hidden.

Which an NT play cards "close to the vest" sometimes.

ruveyn

My ex boyfriend was so private my mom thought he was hiding something and doesn't want people to know something like he did a crime or whatever. After all why would someone be that secretive? Being secretive means you're hiding something and did something or doing something you're not supposed to be doing.

There is also such thing as being too open that can also cause you problems too. Lot of people are in between.

I guess so. It's something that worries me. But no one asks me questions and I'm not exactly the chatty type.

Yes, I think it probably is an aspie trait because socially it's extremely hard to tell what is inappropriate, boring, uncool or laughable.

The things I think are funny and interesting often don't tally with what other people think.

I've wondered this myself. I can be quite secretive, as I was bulled a lot when I was younger and it seemed like things always got used against me. I'm also fairly introverted so that compounds it.

For example, at work I don't like people knowing about my personal life outside of the workplace. On Facebook I use my middle name as my last name and I have 0 pictures of myself. It's sort of a rule I have, I don't want my picture online. I value my privacy and I've even had my name taken off sites like mylife.com and all the other ones I could find. It was a long tedious process but I did it.

I'm secretive about my hobbies and interests sort of. Although, I'm more then happy to discuss them if someone is interested, but when in doubt I don't.

Hello necro.

No, if bullying caused you to be secretive then it's not a trait of AS or ASD. Quite the opposite is often true.

I'm kind of the complete opposite. I have no filter and tend to ramble when I'm nervous. And I never saw a reason to hide anything, so I didn't. It's gotten me into whole heaps of trouble and picked on as a kid. But to me it was too exhausting to filter. I never had the energy to be secretive and I didn't understand the concept of secrets till probably Jr high.

I've been told I'm dangerously naive and way too open. My mom told me a few years ago, the reason we never had surprise parties for anyone was bc as a kid I'd happily tell the person we were gonna have yummy cake and presents.