Do we still judge someone on their appearance ?

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chris1989
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31 Mar 2021, 9:57 am

I remember coming across a video from 2012 titled 'Weird customer in Subway' where someone with a hidden camera was filming a woman who was ordering a sandwich and was distressed by the employees not wearing any gloves even though the guy was wrapping it up without touching the sandwich. It made me quite angry because from the comments I saw a lot of them were very judgemental about her behaviour and others were pointing out that it was possible she was on the autistic spectrum as she was very specific in what she wanted in the sandwich as well other traits I can't quite remember now. But it just made me angry that even in the 21st century 'normal' people will seem to find other people with a hidden disability or a mental health problem as a freak show exhibit to put on the internet for other 'normal' people to ridicule them. It seems just as judgemental about the appearance of for example, singer Susan Boyle because lots of people at first saw her as 'odd' and 'not the typical contestant to see on a TV talent show'.



IsabellaLinton
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31 Mar 2021, 10:07 am

It's especially grievous that women are criticised if they speak up about health and safety, or personal preferences, like that woman did, because they'll be labelled Karens. Women are being shamed by the media any time they attempt to express themselves, and this is especially true for women who may struggle with communication, become flustered, have OCD, or be prone to emotional dysregulation. Women who were taught for generations to speak up, or to feel confident in social situations, are now labelled Karens and hushed very adequately by mainstream society. I can't believe people stand for it.

Do we still judge on appearance? Yes, sadly. The world of ableism is alive and kicking.


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Fnord
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31 Mar 2021, 10:08 am

chris1989 wrote:
Do we still judge someone on their appearance?
Yes, and sometimes unfairly.

We are a visual species, and we are "wired" to rely on visual impressions for our survival and social interactions.

If you do not like being judged for your appearance, then these are your options:

• Do not be seen.

• If you must be seen, then do not stand out.

• If you do stand out, then do so attractively.

• If you are unattractive, then learn to deal with the inevitable derision.

• If you cannot deal with the inevitable derision, then do not expect others to change.



OutsideView
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31 Mar 2021, 12:50 pm

Fnord wrote:
chris1989 wrote:
Do we still judge someone on their appearance?
Yes, and sometimes unfairly.

When are the times that it is fair?


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kraftiekortie
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31 Mar 2021, 12:56 pm

A person who presents a relatively neat appearance, wears clean clothes, and is not slovenly in general----appeals to me more than somebody who doesn't look like he/she takes showers, is dirty in general, and walks around like he/she doesn't care about his/her self.



Fnord
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31 Mar 2021, 12:57 pm

OutsideView wrote:
Fnord wrote:
chris1989 wrote:
Do we still judge someone on their appearance?
Yes, and sometimes unfairly...
When are the times that it is fair?
When seeing people in orange onesies lined up against a wall and being frisked for weapons...

Image

...and judging them as prison inmates, for instance.



Fireblossom
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01 Apr 2021, 9:34 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
A person who presents a relatively neat appearance, wears clean clothes, and is not slovenly in general----appeals to me more than somebody who doesn't look like he/she takes showers, is dirty in general, and walks around like he/she doesn't care about his/her self.


^ This. Sometimes it's appropriate to judge someone by their appearance, and sometimes it's also a safe thing to do. If you're approached on the street by someone who comes off as someone who's drunk or taking drugs, will you play it safe and try to stay away from that person or will you treat them just like you'd treat everyone else just because there's a chance that the person's completely harmless after all? I wouldn't take that chance. If that means that I'm judging people unfairly then too bad, my safety matters to me more than other people's feelings.

As for the situation in the first post, it was wrong to laugh at that woman, regardless of if she was an NT or ND. She was simply caring about hygiene, which is important. I know some countries and areas have low hygiene standards, and people who made fun of that woman could have been from such places, but still.



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01 Apr 2021, 9:43 am

Judging people correctly is always fair.  Judging people incorrectly may not be fair, but when it comes to personal safety, errors on the side of caution are eminently fair when no one gets hurt.