AngelL wrote:
I've been around here for a couple months, but just got dx'd today, like the title said. I knew it was coming, but still feels a little surreal. I'm 56 years old... ASD level 2. I'm relieved and angry. Hopeful and resentful. Kind of an emotional cornucopia right now. I don't know what the point of this post is actually.... but it seemed appropriate somehow.
Hello hello! I'm not sure if I'm allowed to say 'congrats' because I'm still waiting to even *see* a doctor (#16 rejected me yesterday- yipee) but my primary care gave me rudimentary evaluations and the kind people here shared some resources that all but confirmed I have some form of Aspergers and (was) very, very good at masking. A mental breakdown took that ability away.
I. Feel. Your. Anger.
The people who made me got my younger brothers help, but told me that girls were just flighty, spacey, that I specifically was just stupid, trying to get attention, trying to make them look bad, and the BEST ONE they said was "You're just copying what you see"
Which was the only partly true thing- apparently thats masking. I just assumed every human grew up watching and mimicking and thats how society existed. No idea it was supposed to be natural.
Take your time.
Ride your emotions like waves and be patient with yourself. I imagine there's a bizarre peace beneath the anger, and I sincerely hope its pleasant for you.
I hate how the world treats (us?). Please be kind and gentle to yourself. Even though I haven't been diagnosed I've found nothing but love, patience, acceptance, and ample opportunities to learn about myself and others here as I'm sure you're aware (I hope).
Take it easy my friend!
_________________
"I'm laughing because its not funny

"
-Me almost daily