Asperger and bullying project

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At the moment I am at the beginning of a project to promote awareness and prevention of bullying and Asperger's Syndrome with a psychologist friend of mine. It will be a book and DVD combined. I am looking to get contributions for it from people with Asperger's Syndrome (aged 10+) who have been bullied in the workplace, school or society in general. I am a 27 year old Aspie myself who has been bullied in all three spheres.

I would like to get their/your story, how they dealt with the bullying, how they think AS contributed, strategies for dealing with bullying and promoting a safe and secure society for those with AS. Just first names are fine or a fake name if you feel more comfortable. If you know anyone or would like to be involved. Also if you have any questions feel free to email me [email protected].

Please send them to my email address as an attachment or to

Catriona Tyrrell
28 Bowen St
Hawthorn 3122
Vic
Australia

Thanks.

Sounds like a really worthwhile project, Caster2.

I'm pretty busy with work at the moment, but I will try to email you something at the weekend as I would very much like to help if I can.

Thanks.

That would be great girl7000 I am looking forward to getting your contribution. I will let all those involved how the project is going.

In the WORKPLACE? Your only two real options are police and courts. As for me, I never let anything get to where the police needed to be called, and I don't have the time/money for court. That usually means some options may be limited at times, and I can take fewer chances, and don't have recourse if I am wrong. That isn't due to AS though.

Steve

Sometimes workplace bullying can be present, but on a level that is so subtle and passive aggressive that there is nothing that anyone can do about it.
I once worked in an office where I was the "odd duck" in an ocean of neurotypical females...and well...while they did not outwardly bully me, it was obvious that I was not one of them...I would make elaborate drawings on my desk calendar and save scraps of envelopes that i would turn into artwork etc...and then my boss would swoop through and throw away all my stuff when I wasn't around....One co-worker requested to have her desk moved because she couldn't stand to look at me. Another one would constantly roll her eyes and make snide remarks or get aggravated about subtle things that I did that I was completely unaware of....and the majority of the "office ladies" were a closely knit group that inevitably would rag on anyone outside the group.

Stuff like that can kinda have the emotional effect of more blatant and outward bullying

These are the kinds of stories and accounts I am looking for. I am looking forward to recieving some in the mail or email. I think the police and the courts are pretty useless for people with AS unfortunately but thats beside the point.

Getting an official diagnosis save me from losing my job, but there was a lot of subtle and not so subtle bullying over the years and it has left quite a lot of emotional scars. As it is, things could have been a lot worse. I think a fair amount of it was due to jealousy as people with less intelligence made it their job to pull me down to their level of mediocrity rather than doing something to smarten up their own performance.

I dont recall being bullied much in school,mostly just ignored but the work plac has presented many examples and I will write you an email in the next few days.Sounds like a good project to me and I will be glad to contribute my experiences.I think the subject is very signifiant in why many adult aspies are working "beneath their capacities",as shown by current research.

Yeah, I guess I keep forgetting about that. In the US they almost never consider it prejudice unless against a protected class, but disabled(even if truly only differently abled) are considered a kind of protected class.

This is reminiscent of statements like that in the movie "star trek:The undiscovered country", where the aliens talk of how specist the humans are "Listen to yourself, even your LANGUAGE(alienate) speaks to it!"! That is a paraphrase, but gives an idea of the tangent. And yeah, the same has happened with me, but it HAS been far too subtle at times, even if blatently obvious to me and some others.

I realy want to help on this one.

I have read this board and cryed I don't belive anyone should have there childhood blighted by the sort of bullying I sufferd.
When I read of it here that people still do and it makes me soo sad.

i was pretty much bullyied from the 6th grade on jr high was the worst for me, and didnt stop being bullyied until i dropped out of highschool. how i delt with it it was i didnt go to lunch recess, i just wonderd the halls waiting for the bell to ring for the next class or i went to the library

I sent a lenghty letter to help with your project...hope it is worth something for your studies

Would you rather them be honest about it or despise you in secret?

The "uncanny valley" effect caused by an instinctual fear and hatred of the genetically aberrant wont go away because you force people to "play nice".

Personally I would prefer they hate me in silence or behind my back(unless I am dating them,then that bothers me a bit.)I never understood the problem with people being "nice to your face and back stabbing"...I mean they are going to back stab you anyway,at least when you are around you dont have to be destracted by their "in your face" hate.So,my preference is hate me behind my back,if you have to but show a lttle restraint in my presence.Of course that is assuming that you dont accidently think they actually like you when they are "pretending to be nice" and get suckered into doing something for them,etc.I generally assume most people dont like me or are indifferent to me regaurdless to what they say to me.If they like me they will "do" something to show that(very rare)and I can question my cynical paranoia.

But how can you defend yourself from people who are looking for an opportunity to chain you behind their truck and drag you around till you either die or they get bored with it if society forces them to pretend to be your friend?

I'm probably being idealistic though.. if they mean you harm they're going to try to deceive you anyways but if there is a way to prevent the sort of life threatening cruelty Ive endured from happening to another this isn't it.

If you don't know who your enemies are you cant protect yourself from them.

[edit] I just had an interesting thought.. if hate crimes can be defined as violence against an individual solely based upon their inclusion as part of a specific community wouldnt bullying of autistics be considered such and prosecutable? Would need confirmation from someone better versed in the applicable laws to really be sure.

It certainly should be against the law, but I dont think it ever will be unless someone very vocal has the right connections.I have heard of a case where some caucasian individual claimed to be attacked because of their race and it did not stand up in court as a "hate crime".I know some PC police say that there is no such thing as "hate crimes" or discrimination against "whites" because they are the majority group and the ones in power.I think it is pretty racist to say that someone has no power or an ability to hate someone who is another race,just because they themselves are in the minority???This doesnt hold with logic for me.Well,I lived in a neighborhood were I was not the majority(by race),had very little "power" becuase I didnt own a gun,couldnt fight and was physically weaker then those harassing me daily.I dont know if this was because they hated my race,gender or the "sub group" I was physically identified in...(punk rock at the time).I have no idea how this law is defined or by whom,but I know what hate feels like and calling it a crime isnt going to stop the hate but it might help them be more covert in their attacks.Dont know how much that helps.I still have felt more "attacked " for my gender then my aspie traits,but I may just be better at hiding "them" or had less to begin with or???Fill in the ?.Never had much luck hiding my gender but I sure fought against it for a long time.