How do you tell someone they have AS?

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How would you go about telling someone they have asperger's syndrome?

I don't want to upset this person, but I assume she should know. I'm extremely confident that she has AS and so is her older sister. Age wise, the woman is in her late 20's, we are in our early 30's.

I wrote out a long post here explaining how we came to that conclusion, but it was too much reading, so I skipped it. Just assume it's correct info.


I've known her for about 3-4 yrs and would really like to get to know her better. But I am wondering if she would actually hate me for bring this up. Of course, I would rather that not happen.

So anyway, did someone tell you they thought you had AS? Were you mad about it? Were you mad at THEM for telling you? Are you glad you found out?



Your opinion: What would be the best and easiest way to find out?


I'm really at a loss here and would appreciate any advice you could give.


Thanks in advance.

If you're not a psychiatrist than you might merely RECOMMEND to them that they seem to be a good candidate for a diagnosis of autism and perhaps they should consider looking into the matter...
I was surprised when my brother told me he thought I have it, the other 3 have ADHD and as it tends to run in families with AS, I looked into it and was like "Wow, now I know why I'm so odd at times..." It really has explained some things about mine and my father's behavior. Yeah, I was happy to hear about it. But till I get a formal diagnosis, I won't consider that I "definitely" have it. And neither should your girl in question. Hopefully she'll take it the right way, no way to find out but to try my friend. Good luck!

Just get straight to the point? That's what I'd do.

Why dont you get to know her better first. I wouldnt mention autism, but you can tell her about your family member with aspergers and talk about aspie traits.

Considering how many are just WRONG, and the fact that YOU really can't know, maybe you should FORGET about saying "YOU HAVE THIS". SHE is the only one that can really know, psychiatrists try to merely confirm, but a good one will look at your past, etc...

What I would do is try to steer them towards some information that says what AS is. If they have AS, they will probably keep digging and just say WOW!

if you think she has it, then if she's complaining about AS related things then that's the only reason I would tell her. if she's happy with who she is, a label is unnecessary...

Man, I wish that someone had recognized it in me and mentioned it to me a long time ago! I am un-dx but the bets are on that I do have it. If I had known, it would have saved me a lot of heartache.