Found out Dad had autism symptoms as a kid

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I found this out when I figured out I might have autism and husband talked to him (Dad) about it then I finally talked to him about it. Husband initially mediated a phone call because he can explain and talk about things better and also might be taken more seriously for him to talk about it rather than me. So, after decades of never knowing any of this, come to find out my dad had autistic type symptoms as a kid (sound sensory, rocking back and forth a lot not knowing why he liked to do that). Odd thing is he seemed to "grow out" of it (no longer does the rocking as an adult or has trouble with noise). This really surprised me to learn, as I never knew this even through all the years of being picked on/ ridiculed for my sensory issues. What I don't get is how these symptoms seemed to dissipate for him because you cannot grow out of autism right? I clearly still struggle as an adult with some of the exact same things I did as a child. Maybe he had it super mild? I know they probably didn't even know what autism was back then.

Probably just good at masking.

I don't think anyone ever completely grows out of it. How much you change over time varies just like everything about ASD varies from person to person.

However, rocking and sensory issues are not always due to autism. But maybe should try the AQ and see if he still might be ASD.

My mother was probably autistic too, but didn't realize it until I recently studied everything ASD.

My (ASD) mom "suppressed" her sensitivities - it then showed up as medical incidents or physical or emotional withdrawal.

I do think many sensitivities mellow with age. It's possible if they were minor they could "go away". More likely it has to do with stress. My mom claims she's happy and without sensitivities, but that's b/c she has very little daily stress right now and is highly avoidant. I guarantee if she had to go the grocery shopping, make dinners, take care of kids, work --- her sensitivities would be back with a vengeance. A person in control of their life can arrange it in a way to avoid sensitivities (not that they went away). A person without that will notice their sensitivities more.

My understanding is that the percentage of Autistic children who outgrow it is approximately zero.

But, if symptoms are mild I believe a person could go through life just being seen as a bit odd rather than being identified as Autistic...and Asperger's syndrome wasn't even a recognized diagnosis in the U.S. until 1994! Before that the only diagnoses available would've been variations of "a bit odd".

I made it to age 64 before I suspected I was on the Autism Spectrum. And it was only due to a convergence of coincidences that I even considered Autism. Without those coincidences I would never have found out I had an Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level 1 (Mild)—instead I would have gone to my grave wondering what was wrong with everyone.

Further, I could easily believe that, over the years, your Dad could be Autistic but have progressively developed the skills needed to pass as NT. Autistic traits would likely have been more apparent when he was young (when the official diagnosis would've been "a bit odd"). If that is what happened, he is to be commended on his success!

in retrospect i suspect my dad was on the spectrum and he used alcohol to deal with it.

Yeah my dad has managed to make a successful life for himself (good job, had kids).

auntblabby, sounds like it is very possible for your dad. Substance use is a way to try to cope.


AardvarkGoodSwimmer
Yes school is not the greatest with autism, work can be tough too depending on the job.

I'm not officially diagnosed but I'd say I definitely had more traits when younger. I still rock back and forth now but I catch myself doing it and stop, but as a child I did it a lot, plus I'd pace up and down repeatedly to calm myself. I even made a hole in the wall as I used to press my hand against it repeatedly while pacing. I'm not sure I've 'grown out' of autism but it affects me differently. I get sensory overload much worse than I ever did as a child.

Also, my dad has sadly passed but he had clear traits as a child and adult. He took everything literally to the point if you said 'that's cool' as a way of saying 'that's great' he would think you were talking about temperature.