Accomodation study - tear me apart for 36 hours please?

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mechanima
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24 Jul 2007, 5:39 pm

Here is the accomodation study, for national level submission. I am well behind with my timing, and it has to be sent on thursday WHATEVER, but PLEASE study it for the next 36 hours if you have a moment and mail me at the addy on the bottom if you can see even the slightest thing wrong with it?

http://www.aspergerireland.com/temp.htm

M



mechanima
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25 Jul 2007, 10:02 am

60 hits and not a WORD of criticism?

Hey, I know I am GOOD...but I'm not THAT good... :wink:

Please tell me if you can see ANYTHING I have said that you feel is:

a) Wrong.
b) Misrepresents you.
c) Suffers from idiosyncratic spelling and/or grammar.
d) Is just plain MISSING.

M



Mishcana
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25 Jul 2007, 10:26 am

I'm a graphic designer, the main thing I've noticed is it's very hard to read.

It *might* be that I'm on a mac, but the line length is way to long, shorter columns are much easier to read.

If it's just a reported posted into a webpage though, I'll see if I can try harder to read it. :)

Haven't caught any spelling errors yet, but I do have trouble reading the format.



mechanima
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25 Jul 2007, 10:49 am

Thanks,

That kind of thing is IMPORTANT...and that is the kind of comment I need...

It will be printed up on A4 paper with a far shorter line length

But I am taking up the font size and breaking it up, because I believe that the easier a document is to read, the more chance of those you submit it to reading it PROPERLY.

See what you think.

M



Rocketv8
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25 Jul 2007, 10:49 am

Just came across the thread and I am reading it now.



mechanima
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25 Jul 2007, 11:05 am

There is a link to the (newly) formatted doc now...

Did I overdo it? Or is it ok?

M



Koldune
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25 Jul 2007, 11:30 am

The content is very well put together. You've stated the situation very thoroughly. I've looked at both versions.

For format, do you have a reason for using that particular sans-serif font? It's Century Gothic, according to my MSWord program. You might consider using the sans-serif font only for headlines, and put the text in a smaller, serifed font, such as Times New Roman. That's what a newspaper or magazine would do, at least here in America. A sans-serif font is generally easier to read, because there's more variation in the letters, making it harder to mistake one for another. The font sizes are okay, but you could probably get away with 14 point for the title, 12 point for the subordinate headlines, and 10 point for the text, instead of 18, 14, and 12 respectively, if you wanted to decrease the size of the overall document.

I've noted a few commas and such in what I would consider odd places. I know, however, that British, and presumably thus Irish, punctuation conventions differ from American ones, sometimes drastically, so I don't think I can help you there.

Good luck with this document. I hope it helps someone.


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krex
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25 Jul 2007, 12:05 pm

I think every thing looked good except one thing,that may just be due to a "special interest" and not cause issue for anyone else.The problem for me is the heading....."The Final Solution"...this was a nazi term for genocide and the death camps.It just bothers me to see it,especially in a paper talking about people with AS.Perhaps you could consider changing it to...."Solutions".
I love the idea of home owner ship if the individuals have adiquite support with the papaer work,repairs and legal issues.Those things are very over whelming to me and have kept me a renter for all my life.(43).Good job on the paper,I hope it helps resolve some issues.


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mechanima
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25 Jul 2007, 12:08 pm

I get your point Koldune..

Though personally I hate serifed fonts...(just a *me* thing I suspect). I've tweaked the sizes where you suggest, and used Ariel for the headers to vary it a bit...I've just replaced the .doc file

I think it looks better, the length of the documents became intimidating at font 12.

Thanks for the reassurance that I *got* everything.

M



mechanima
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25 Jul 2007, 12:20 pm

krex wrote:
I think every thing looked good except one thing,that may just be due to a "special interest" and not cause issue for anyone else.The problem for me is the heading....."The Final Solution"...this was a nazi term for genocide and the death camps.It just bothers me to see it,especially in a paper talking about people with AS.Perhaps you could consider changing it to...."Solutions".
I love the idea of home owner ship if the individuals have adiquite support with the papaer work,repairs and legal issues.Those things are very over whelming to me and have kept me a renter for all my life.(43).Good job on the paper,I hope it helps resolve some issues.


Hi Krex...

That aspect is as deliberate as it gets...because it throws out a huge wallop of cognitive dissonance to get 'em past the lesser cognitive dissonance of the idea of the state buying people *free* homes (in an insanely overheated property market) and into the reality that is would actually be CHEAPER to do it that way.

But is it OTT? Not sure yet...

Just FYI, here in Ireland, as long as the homes remain in the ownership of the state on the same terms as existing social housing, all repairs, etc are the responsibility of the State (in this case, most likely in the form of the local authority) and rents are subsidised to about $15 pw for welfare recipients and on a means tested, sliding scale for others.

M



krex
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25 Jul 2007, 1:33 pm

mechanima wrote:
krex wrote:
I think every thing looked good except one thing,that may just be due to a "special interest" and not cause issue for anyone else.The problem for me is the heading....."The Final Solution"...this was a nazi term for genocide and the death camps.It just bothers me to see it,especially in a paper talking about people with AS.Perhaps you could consider changing it to...."Solutions".
I love the idea of home owner ship if the individuals have adiquite support with the papaer work,repairs and legal issues.Those things are very over whelming to me and have kept me a renter for all my life.(43).Good job on the paper,I hope it helps resolve some issues.


Hi Krex...

That aspect is as deliberate as it gets...because it throws out a huge wallop of cognitive dissonance to get 'em past the lesser cognitive dissonance of the idea of the state buying people *free* homes (in an insanely overheated property market) and into the reality that is would actually be CHEAPER to do it that way.

But is it OTT? Not sure yet...

Just FYI, here in Ireland, as long as the homes remain in the ownership of the state on the same terms as existing social housing, all repairs, etc are the responsibility of the State (in this case, most likely in the form of the local authority) and rents are subsidised to about $15 pw for welfare recipients and on a means tested, sliding scale for others.

M


Ok,I guess I see your point,it certainly created cognitive dissonance for me(as well as a quessy feeling that comes with it).
The current system over here seems to be to create opportunities for low income people to buy houses and then a stagnent economy that causese them to go default on the lones so they lose all the money the put into it as well as the house.The only people who seem to be profitting from this system are loan bankers and all the "middle men" who get commissions,such as lawyers,real estate co.,etc.The general practive is to have "section 8 housing for low income",which takes years to get on,sliding scale rent for people on disability or social service DD housing for those who need 24 hour care.I worked in the last situaation for the past 4 years and it is horrible.The majority of the workers are from Africa and dont like or respect the people who live in the houses(many who can not speak for themselves to complain).This seems to be the current trend for people with disabilities.The money spent on these homes,per day is unbelievable but when the clients have needs...all we would hear is...there is no money for that.It was very sad.


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mechanima
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25 Jul 2007, 1:58 pm

Krex,

This is a really small country (less than 4 million) , and sooner or later everybody "winds up at the same weddings", even so, things are bad enough for people with disabilities of any kind...

I genuinely do not understand how anybody ever survives in many other places. The systems I know of do not seem surviveable in the most basic sense, unless you have family/friends/spouse to subsidise you every step of the way (and, of course EVERY Aspie has those to spare :roll: ).

I think maybe that is why I am using such an emotive phrase...I want to remind them to crush any part of them that would rather just hang us out to dry...

M



werbert
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25 Jul 2007, 7:01 pm

I don't like the term "Sensitive senses," in the middle of the paper. It's redundant. I will try to suggest something better.

Found it- "Sensory issues"

And for "sensory sensitivity," in the paragraph above, you could use "noise sensitivity."



mechanima
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26 Jul 2007, 1:38 am

werbert wrote:
I don't like the term "Sensitive senses," in the middle of the paper. It's redundant. I will try to suggest something better.

Found it- "Sensory issues"

And for "sensory sensitivity," in the paragraph above, you could use "noise sensitivity."


Definately right, but I can't change those cos they are quotes from individuals, and I am not even happy with tidying spelling in those (though I have) in case I change the meaning.

Well, it's all in envelopes waiting to post. Thank you all for ALL the help...

Now I have to wash behind my ears and try to look presentable to meet with an NGO in the hope of convincing them that you really cannot throw an Autism initiative without inviting an autistic or two.

Wish me luck...

M



Koldune
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26 Jul 2007, 7:37 am

[quote]I get your point Koldune..
Though personally I hate serifed fonts...(just a *me* thing I suspect).[/quote]


Hmmmm. You're not alone there, and I apologize for not having thought of it causing you difficulty personally. Now that I think of it, one of the reasons my son, a high-functioning autistic, had trouble learning to read was that he couldn't reasily correlate one font to another. He could deal with a sans-serif font semireasonably, but changing text to a different font looked to him like changing it to a completely different language. His mother told me at one point that a sans-serif font in large type would be best for letters to him. Although I am a diagnosed aspie, my impairments are extremely mild. Shifting fonts has never been a problem for me.


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Koldune
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04 Aug 2007, 3:58 pm

How did the submission go?


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Ek mun þola. (I shall endure [Old Norse]).
The greatest school of magic is life itself; the strongest spell, the one you cast yourself.
I ain't been vampired: you've been Weatherwaxed.
?E. Weatherwax
Pro te ipso faciete. (Do for yourself.)