Peer teasing may be misguided attempt to help

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A lot of autistic children suffer from a severe problem of teasing from peers. The problem may not be rooted in the other students' behavior at all. Strangely enough, these people may be trying to implement a very old, very primal form of therapy. I've cross-referenced several studies pointing to a rise in aggression upon the release of vasopressin into the system, and it's possible that male youths use playful teasing and aggression as an important developmental tool. For those of you not in the know, vasopressin is an important social hormone that is active in long-term bonding, as illustrated in the healthy squabbling that established couples tend to engage in during their everyday lives. Autistic children are known to have trouble utilizing this important hormone, which may be the reason for their aversive response to friendly (or not-so-friendly) attempts by peers to get a rise out of them. This also may explain the popularity of aggressive forms of music among many Aspergians; they may be turning to this as a method of inducing the release of vasopressin, thereby significantly improving their brain chemistry.

One way that we can help ourselves would be to understand this playful teasing as an attempt to reach out to us. A healthy social response would be to rise slightly to these baiting games but also restrain ourselves from responding with agitation. For some of us, this should induce a release of vasopressin into the system, thereby assisting us, in the long-term, in developing healthy social bonds.

As a curiosity, my lifemate and I have a propensity for playfully smacking or punching each other as a form of affection, and we also tend to engage in quite a bit of playful bickering. If my thinking is correct, this would explain the unusual depth and permanence of our feelings for one another. However, this also explains why couples who are in mutually abusive relationships keep going back to one another in spite of both knowing that it's unhealthy for them.

As a kid, often I would be teased or even preceive something as teasing when it was not and react angry or even violent at times. I always felt bad because I miss understood what they were doing, they were indeed, kidding around, they obviously wanted my friendship and I acted like an @$$.

This is a very interesting article. It sounds alot like my problem even to this day it could be occuring.

I guess we would need to get urine samples from people on the spectrum exposed to teasing to confirm increase vasopressin in their urine. Compared to some highly isolated protected control group of autistics.

Though at best its likely a catch-22. Yes the vasopression improves social aspect in the autistic but they might be overly sensitive to teasing and that might lead to a host of comorbid problems.

Thank you for your critical eye, Machine. I think that the solution to this problem might be to intensively train these kids in how to deliver a positive social response. Although it may be unrealistic to hope that all children could be helped by such a measure, I think that understanding the relationship between teasing and vasopressin could play a pivotal role in the future of therapy for autistic children and adults.

Woodsman, don't worry; it's possible that you just have a deficiency in the the receptors and glands that are responsible for responding positively. Whether this is permanent or reparable remains to be known, but it may be helpful for you to try music as a method of retraining your system. Specifically, look for death metal and aggressive forms of rock. Although acheiving results may take years, I think that it could help.

heh, indeed, In not too concerned, i just learned recently to chill a bit, i thought this could be a possibility, knowing im interpereting things wrong, resulting in the wrong reaction, then when I saw this article the light clicked on. Heh.

Thats an interesting remidy, of course, I wish it woulda came a decade ago, hahahah, i would be good by now, ohhh well...

Nice trygriff(SARC), but most of the teasing I was subject to, name, eye, lies(things people just made up about me) could not help in the least! Only ONE guy EVER dared to try to claim he was trying to help me. That guy was an idiot and everyone was agast at his claim.

Last edited by 2ukenkerl on 12 Aug 2007, 5:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.

im fine with teasing from my mate....

had one where anytime either of us did anything dumb (term is LOOSELY used) we'd take the other's forehad and rub light circles in it (to massage the brain) and end it with a light tap of the fingers whilst coo at eachother. we called it "bopping" each other

but getting to that point with someone and having them tease me is kinda hard.

ive found that when they tease me over something new and novel... i take it poorly... but once the style of teasing or the subject has been presented to me... then i do much better


plus, i ease up once ive been with them a while... i have no other choice, as my rate of teasable offenses is a constant steady stream!

ive been told im a laugh a minute ><


i dont really like teasing from other people, though i am ever trying to be gracious about it.

well i dont believe that. how is bullying someone trying to help them? what be more like them? uhhh

Sorry, but my love of Marilyn Manson hasn't improved my negative reaction to bullying at all. I get agitated whenever anyone besides my husband attempts to "tease" me, and apparently I give off an unsettling vibe, because people always back off quickly. I stay polite and civil, but something comes through that shuts folks up. But yeah, the vasopressin theory is very interesting, and when I look back at my school years I remember that most other girls were really trying to get through to me rather than humiliate or bully me. But the guys...not so much.

I'd have to see a few clinical trials to say more on the music, then. My own experiences are actually pretty consistent with this idea, and this may have caused me to jump the gun on it. I'll do more scouring and see what I can piece together. However, I haven't yet found any clinical trials relating vasopressin to music, so I'll have to rely upon behavioral studies, which are a little paltry for my tastes. I'm stacking high odds on it, though, because I think that there's a relationship between it and the type of music played at high energy dance clubs; being a trust hormone, it would be useful to stimulate its release if one wishes to obtain a sexual partner. However, stimulating its release in crowded scenes could have the effect of shorting the system and causing a person to form a permanent attachment to everything that happened to be in his or her environment at the time. It is of note, however, that ecstasy has the effect of releasing both oxytocin and vasopressin, so perhaps the quickest route would be to follow the bouncing MDMA.

Oh, and I'm referring to good-natured teasing, not so much bullying...

Come off it. I can't believe what it says in an old school report by so called educational psychologist:

"Paul is socially inept, he finds it hard to relate to his peers. He cannot handle their teasing and taunts which puzzle and upset him. He rubs people up the wrong way and when he is at his most vulnerable he becomes, defensive, silly and uncooperative...blablabla...He is able to articulate that these factors are out of his control...blablabla...has difficulty handling relationships with people. He is a natural victim"

Basically if you were bullied in that school it is your fault, not the bullies.

I realize there's a difference between bullying and "good natured teasing," but unfortunately when I was a little girl I couldn't tell the difference until it was too late and I was already face down on the ground. For some reason, my adult brain still can't differentiate between these two forms of "social interaction." I think I react badly to teasing for a couple of reasons. One is having had lots of harmful early childhood experiences as described above. But I think the main reason I still react badly to "good natured teasing" as an adult is because it seems that the person teasing me is implying a level of intimacy and comfort between us that I personally don't feel, and it generates a bad reaction in me. I can't even describe it. Kind of a mix of shock, revulsion and defensiveness - like they've invaded my space in some way, or even slapped my face. I can't describe it properly, I know. I'm working hard on "loosening up" about this, but it's difficult. I'm envious when I hear other people bantering amongst themselves, but I'm probably one of those people who'll never be able to do it. It feels forced and fake to me.

So maybe there is some truth to this vasopressin thing, and maybe my brain can't process it or whatever. Like I said, it's an interesting idea.

Very interesting thoughts, 0=true. Perhaps it would also be enlightening to discover whatever it is in those administering the teasing that prevents them from understanding that their actions are not being taken well. They could have a deficiency in some area of the brain or some hormonal system that is responsible for social empathy, which would put them in as much need as the autist. Ideally, people should be able to detect how their joshing is being taken by another person, so it's probably not entirely accurate to attribute the dysfunction strictly to the autist. I think that the way to distinguish between bullying and good-natured teasing would be examining whether the person administering it relents or apologizes upon receiving an obviously negative reaction.

I have a friend who is diagnosed with schizotypal personality disorder, which is to schizophrenia what Asperger is to autism. The disorders are similar to a degree, so I think that this is relevant. One strange peculiarity of his behavior is that he feels highly uncomfortable with hearing his own name or the name of another person. His reaction to hearing his name is much the same as your reaction to social teasing. Peculiarly enough, I have a similar reaction to names, and I used to resent people's insistence upon saying it just to be saying it.

Aww, that makes me want to hold you protectively and growl ferociously at anyone who comes too close. I hope you don't mind.

I think it's a little too early to use a cheeky word like 'truth' for it because it's still more likely than not that I've taken a few interesting correlations and extrapolated them too far. This has been known to happen with me, so I wouldn't suggest you put more money on it than reason demands.

How can you say that a 'light hearted tease' that might be consider good natured is not also intented to hurt? Million dollar question.


You can turn the therory on it's head. Vasopressin is a hormone it isn't a ferramone, it is not tranfer to the victim as a signal. So you could saying bulling someone affirms the bully with his peers in genral. I don't think it is specically for bonding with the victim.

No is merely highlights that NTs aren't arware that this empathy is infact highly selctive so in fact there is no reason to asume Aspies are not feeling empathy in different situations.

Empathy is still a delusion by definition. You have to think you know what it like for the other person. It is impossible to know for sure. People believe they do like Schizotypal. But our minds are quite different so you can't expect us to be in the same ball park all the time.