Page 1 of 1 [ 12 posts ] 

Nully
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jul 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 11

13 Aug 2007, 10:03 am

Hello everyone. For all of my life I never really could show my emotions very well. For example, during Christmas, when my brother and sister would get gifts they really wanted, they would just be really excited, maybe scream, and stuff like that. If I got a gift I really wanted, I would just say something like "Thanks" in a monotonous tone, even though I would be very excited on the inside. Another example is I recently went on a cruise, and when I got back, my parents asked me "So how was your vacation?". I just responded with "It was good" in a monotonous tone, even though I really liked it. I just never feel any urge to go beyond that, because it seems embarrassing and pointless. All of this leads to people thinking I'm not grateful for the stuff they do for me, even though that is not true. Please help!



Sopho
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Apr 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,859

13 Aug 2007, 10:06 am

Nully wrote:
Hello everyone. For all of my life I never really could show my emotions very well. For example, during Christmas, when my brother and sister would get gifts they really wanted, they would just be really excited, maybe scream, and stuff like that. If I got a gift I really wanted, I would just say something like "Thanks" in a monotonous tone, even though I would be very excited on the inside. Another example is I recently went on a cruise, and when I got back, my parents asked me "So how was your vacation?". I just responded with "It was good" in a monotonous tone, even though I really liked it. I just never feel any urge to go beyond that, because it seems embarrassing and pointless. All of this leads to people thinking I'm not grateful for the stuff they do for me, even though that is not true. Please help!

I'm exactly the same. I don't worry about it anymore though because my family all know I have AS so they understand. I dunno what you can do to fix it really, do your family/close friends etc know you have AS?



Irulan
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 May 2007
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,463
Location: Poland

13 Aug 2007, 10:19 am

There's something what always annoys me when I watch those TV programmes during which you must call and give a good answer and if you do it, you win something. Having won you are expected to show excitement in your voice. You are expected to start to shout hooray or something like that like a little kid who can't control emotions :?



Malachi_Rothschild
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 4 Aug 2007
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 375

13 Aug 2007, 10:55 am

Usually I don't react much to gifts, and sometimes I react the wrong way (when I opened up the PS2 my gf got me when they first came out I got upset with her for spending so much money) but one time my parents got me an electronic model of the enterprise from TNG and I went nuts.



Aradford
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 26 Jul 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 447
Location: Canada

13 Aug 2007, 11:02 am

Well you can express them through art, music, literature... You can express them verbally or physically... Or you can just bottle them up and let them fester in to some kind of chaotic mess inside your mind.



sandra3
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 31 Oct 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 355
Location: california

13 Aug 2007, 11:11 am

im an art person and i find writing and painting a good form of expression. i may seem "cold" but im really not. i can cry, laugh, smile, get angry, and depressed. it seems that people always ask me if im pissed off or sad. my mom keeps saying i put on a "dog face". like i should have a big grin glued to my face all the time. so im not totally void of emotion.



Stitch
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 5 Nov 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 62

13 Aug 2007, 11:12 am

Carry emotion cards, and flash them when needed :p



alexbeetle
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Mar 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,314
Location: beetle hole

13 Aug 2007, 11:22 am

If I feel I haven't reacted appropriately or strongly enough to something then I send a thank you or a sorry card afterwards (usually a free ecard eg from Hallmark website). Sometimes the next day I will bring the topic up again after I had time to think about it and process the information and say 'by the way thankyou/sorry/you looked nice yesterday etc.......'

I never could do the 'jumping for joy' thing and when I tried I sound stupid and false.
I hate the makeover and reality tv progs when the people at the end are supposed to be surprised and start showing a huge reaction - I especially hate it on US shows as that is even more OTT...


_________________
Any implied social connection is an artifact of the distance between my computer and yours.

It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.


samtoo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,762
Location: England

13 Aug 2007, 3:56 pm

I feel that sometimes... I just don't feel the need to sound anything else than that when it comes to a simple thanks...


_________________
Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.


EatingPoetry
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 28 Jun 2007
Age: 57
Gender: Female
Posts: 407
Location: Inside me 'ead, all alone.

13 Aug 2007, 4:00 pm

Stitch wrote:
Carry emotion cards, and flash them when needed :p


Lol! That would be very useful.


_________________
Winner of the very first Parakeet Award!


gwynfryn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Aug 2004
Gender: Male
Posts: 529
Location: France

13 Aug 2007, 4:13 pm

Nully wrote:
Hello everyone. For all of my life I never really could show my emotions very well.


So what are you proposing? As an autistic, I prefer not to be ruled by my emotions, but I have no problem communicating my love for my family; in fact I have no recollection of trying!

I'm puzzled why anyone would feel any desire to "show" emotions? Isn't it more important that you care?



arem
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 31 Jul 2007
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 155

13 Aug 2007, 6:52 pm

Quote:
I'm puzzled why anyone would feel any desire to "show" emotions? Isn't it more important that you care?


Because showing emotions is how "normal" people show that they care; they expect the same in return. Just telling them that you care isn't enough*, and strangely, actions are often not enough either.

* at least some NTs will ignore what you say about your feelings, and listen only to how you say it.


_________________
I'm... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯