Today I went to a restaurant that my sister works at. I went by myself. During the course of the day, I had done 4 hours of work at my job, helped a friend accommodate a new pet and did some shopping for her. I took a nap. When I woke up I decided to make the trek down to the restaurant. (It's fairly close.)
Was a good meal. But on the way home, I felt very drained and depressed. Had a lot of thoughts of wanting to self isolate and never see another person for the rest of my life.
Ran into someone with a dog on the way home, I tried to just walk past but the dog approached me. Had a short interaction with the owner. The dog was huge, but she said he was still a puppy. Looked to be a St Bernard or something similar. (My special interest as a child/teen was dogs.)
Anyways. Got home. Sat at computer to listen to vent music. My phone started ringing and I remember that I had agreed to chat with a friend around this time..... Ignored, even as friend kept calling. I can not do this. Not right now. Not even to tell them to take a rain check. Eventually they quit calling.
I have read that "social overload" can be a thing in autism? I'm also wondering if what I experienced was a shutdown. I tend to attribute this kind of response to social situations to AVPD (avoidant personality disorder), but perhaps I don't have AVPD after all and it's just another symptom of autism?
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ASD level 1, ADHD-C, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)
Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD
30 Mar 2023, 11:35 pm
