Should I wear NC headphones at supermarket?

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NC = Noise Cancelling.

The only noises that upset me in public places are children screeching and motorcycles or cars with loud engines. I do have a pair of NC headphones that I use to block out the noise of the inconsiderate neighbours, but I was wondering if wearing them might help me feel more relaxed when out, as my right ear is really sensitive to high-pitched shrieks that kids make. I mean this literally, but whenever a kid lets out an ear-splitting screech near me my right ear physically feels like it's going to bleed. It makes me wince and puts me in a bad mood.

The only trouble is, wearing NC headphones in public might make me look and feel autistic. But other autistics usually wear NC headphones to block out all noise, where as I'd only be wearing them to protect my right ear from the ugly noise of kids. But the NC headphones look larger than music headphones so I'm afraid that it might be obvious that they're NC headphones and the only people that wear those in supermarkets are autistic people, so it might give me away. Also I might see someone I know and they might realise I'm ASD once they see I have NC headphones on.

I would wear earplugs but people might wonder why I have earplugs in, and I don't like listening to music on headphones while shopping because it's a distraction.

Can music headphones be bigger like NC headphones? Will it make it obvious that I'm ASD if I have NC headphones on?

Yes you should if you think it will help.

I remember when I was suffering quite bad with anxiety when I went out.

I used to cycle everywhere so that automatically helped but I also never used to remove my cycle helmet when I went into supermarkets either. I just felt protected in some way. It's strange how you soon learn that actually no one cares what you look like. They may give you a double take but after that they're far too busy with themselves.

And also I don't think that autism is the first thing that people think when they see a person wearing headphones. Every other person wears them where I'm from. I don't assume any of them are autistic.

I’d have no problem with that. I wear earplugs at the gym and sometimes on public transport… or anywhere if there’s noisy kids. If I could find the right NC headphones I’d happily wear them.

I wear earplugs, which are obvious, and it's well worth it. I feel so much more at ease. I can take my time and am happy. Hi-fi ear plugs are quite discreet (won't see them on first glance) and cut back on the high frequencies, like screeching children. If those worked for you ($35), they'd be completely worth it. I know you said NC, but don't recall if you've tried filters since it's a particular noise that's bothering you.

Yes, at least try it. If it doesn't make any difference, then stop. But, I see a fair number of people coming into the store everyday wearing bulky over the ear headphones, and I have no way of knowing who is listening to music and who isn't.

Chances are that nobody is going to think anything is weird about it, as long as you can still hear anybody that you're talking to if you're asking questions. Even me doing it at the end of my shift after years of not, has barely raised any eyebrows at all. A random customer doing it isn't going to be something people pay attention to.

Personally, I've started wearing earplugs after I get off, and I definitely feel a lot calmer. I just can't get away with it while working, as customers expect me to hear them and some people are such low talkers that if they're wearing a mask, I can't tell if they're talking.

If you’re concerned that they’re bulky maybe look for another pair that’s thinner for outdoor use. Mine are NC + Bluetooth and I don’t think they’re bulky-looking. They weren’t expensive either (Amazon). I’m only suggesting that bc I know how self-conscious you are. Otherwise, I agree no one cares and most people don’t know enough about autism to assume someone in headphones is autistic, or the reasons why they want NC. That might require empathy on their part.

I still wear a face mask and half the time I have my dark sunglasses in shops bc I forget to flip into my normal glasses in the car. IDGAF what people think, but that’s just me. I’d wear my NCs but I hate wearing them out of the house bc I can hear my own footsteps.

I imagine elsewhere, one would assume 'music' than 'autism'.
Or a message that says 'not hearing you talk at the moment'.


My earplugs are discrete -- it doesn't stick out nor isn't very visible unless one looks at the direct angle where my ears are.

It's also relatively small, not meant for those who are fine motor clumsy. Unless I modify it somewhat.

And it's somewhat a DIY custom than a particular brand.

It only consists of a single flanged soft silicone (which can be replaced by anything else) for comfort and a very basic 'filther' as a 'base' that allows some 'stiffness' that can stick to my ears (also replaceable if the measurements are right)

Yes, I found that one can mix and match earplug parts that can be dissembled.
This even includes earphone buds -- which I use for my earphones with detachable ear tips that can be replaced.


I dunno.
It seems that my own sensory equipment is discrete because that's what I can only afford.

My glasses are transition glasses (frames were fashionable enough to be mistaken for brand new), my earplugs are more discreet than your average wireless earplug...


To be honest this reminds me of ordering a pair of fleece earmuffs for cold and humid weather or colder temperature rooms so I don't need to use a hoodie or a hat.

... And I'm in the tropics so it will inevitably stand out. Yet I'm confident enough to get away with it.

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I don't mind if I still hear the kids screaming while wearing NC headphones, because I know the sound won't hurt my ears. I have a perforated eardrum so my ears (mostly my right ear) can physically hurt at extreme pitches (really low or really high).

I have non-NC music headphones but I don't have NC music headphones. I'd like it get some, because then at home I can listen to my audiobooks without still being able to hear the noisy neighbours. But I'm a bit strapped for cash and I've recently paid a lot for the non-NC music headphones I have. I looked at cheaper NC music headphones on Amazon but I wasn't keen on the reviews as there seemed to be a lot of complaints.

If they will help then yes.

I've seen other autistic people wearing them at the grocery store I go to and no one bothered them. Maybe some area are more ok with seeing people who are different.

Usually, custom-made earplugs are not visible unless someone is looking at a profile of your ears. But head on, they're completely INSIDE the ear, not sticking out like the type you buy at the drug store. And if a stranger notices your profile and sees the earplugs, so what?

While we're on the subject of screeching, shrieking, screaming kids (and I'm not going to assume that most of these kids are nonverbal autistic), SHAME ON THE PARENTS for allowing their kids to act this way. These are not meltdowns. They are not tantrums. In fact, in 99 percent of the case, the kid seems happy or delighted. They're just making a lot of shrill loud noise while the dumbarse parent stands nearby AND DOES NOTHING. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

A puppy can be trained to sit still and quiet while tennis balls are bounced past it. This is how service dogs are trained. Yet parents can't train their preschoolers and toddlers not to scream/shriek in public? Again, these are not meltdowns, trantrums or injuries. These parents are so full of themselves, thinking that everyone wants to hear their kids shrieking and yelling.

Whenever I happen to be passing by these feeble minded parents, I stick both fingers in both ears (even though I have earplugs), hopeing they will see me doing this.

And this is where some good eye contact comes in handy!! !

I've actually said things. One time I approached a man in the shoe department of Kohl's whose preschooler was letting out really shrill loud shrieks while in a stroller, for no reason other than maybe boredom? amusement? Only God knows. I asked the man, "Is your child alright? Is she hurt? I keep hearing all this shrieking."

There's no excuse for this. And if you read parenting website forums, you'll see that a lot of NTs can't stand this, either. All the parents who complain about this in forums can't all be autistic.

The parents NEVER, NEVER take measures to shut their kid up. So it's not an issue of, "If a kid wants to scream, they're going to do it." Sometimes the parents even encourage it. This is akin to those jackarses who put the loudest pipes possible on their motorcycles, then tear down the street. It's all about attention and being narcissistic.

Where are yall hearing these shrieking kids 24/7? I can't think of a time or place when I've heard that, other than maybe a hospital nursery full of newborns. Come to think of it, hospitals don't even have nurseries anymore. The only examples I can think of are school kids on recess. That can be noisy because there's hundreds of them. My neighbours' kids sometimes laugh and play Marco Polo in their swimming pool, but it's appropriate and actually pretty cute.

I don't hear kids being shrill in stores or the cinema. I've raised three kids myself and it was never an issue except when my HFA son flipped out in his first movie theatre experience because of the loud noise. We left the cinema for his sake but also to avoid upsetting the other patrons.

I'm not disputing that you hear noisy kids. I guess I'm just shocked. We must be really sedate where I live, or else everyone is a really good parent. It's just not a thing here at all.

^It is so common to have kids letting out shrill screams here. Nearly every time I set foot in a supermarket there's at least one toddler in there either having a temper tantrum over nothing or excitably letting out shrill noises, completely unexpected. It really hurts my ears. One time I winced and put my finger in the ear that hurt, and the mother glared at me with such a hateful expression, as if to say "how dare you be offended by my little darling, it's only a toddler!"
Saying "it's only a toddler" doesn't switch off my sensitivity to the noise! Yes, the parents hate it when others react. If that were me with a squealing toddler I'd tell the toddler to sshh. Parents saying "sshh" to a toddler actually works wonders.

I remember when I was in a library one time, and there was this 2-year-old running around squealing at the top of its lungs, completely unattended by any adults. I was taught from a young age that libraries are quiet places and that any fooling around and we'd have to go out. Kids today just get away with everything, and everywhere is so family-friendly and everybody's got to just put up with it.

Where I come from there are a lot of chavvy people, and it's usually those sorts of people who have the loudest kids. Chavs are generally not very respectful, quite low in intelligence (but not as in having any neurodevelopmental disorders, probably more in a lazy sense), can't seem to cope with their kids, and are less attentive and just let their kids get away with murder. So the kids are always screaming for attention and run riot around the store, and these days staff aren't allowed to intervene. When I was a kid the staff would tell us off before our parents could if we were misbehaving in a store. I think kids listen to authority figures more. And anyway, if we misbehaved our parents were allowed to spank us in public on the butt. It never hurt but it did shut us up.

Times have changed.

Shrieking loud kids are EVERYWHERE. They scream at their own shadow. They scream if they're sitting in a little wagon being pulled down the street. They scream if they get squired by water. Almost always girls. Little girls are being raised to be p*ssies: weak, playing the role of victim, being permitted and sometimes encouraged to scream, scream, scream.

They'll grow up to be screamers during a crisis. A screaming woman is never productive during an emergency, and a productive woman during an emergency never screams.

Preschoolers even at the CLIMBING GYM are allowed to run around shrieking -- this is an "adult" climbing gym, not a jungle-type gym like at Chuck E Cheese. But patrons are permitted to bring in even newborns. At least one parent will climb, and their older kids will climb, but the toddlers and preschoolers hang out and shriek. Sometimes a 4 or 5 year old will climb, and jump around shrieking.

Two doors down live several little girls. They shriek when jumping in the trampoline in their backyard, and I hear it when I'm in the FRONT of my house, all doors closed.

Whole Foods, other grocery stores, restaurants, you name it.

There's a reality show, "7 Little Johnstons," and I caught a clip one day, the mom was saying how her kids were screaming in the backyard, and it was several minutes before she realized the shed was on fire (that's why they were screaming), because they normally scream WHILE PLAYING.

When I was growing up, if a girl screamed, everyone knew there was a big problem. Kids didn't shriek like banshees when playing; only if stung by a bee or a fire, etc. When my cousin at age 7 suddenly screamed, everyone knew she was in trouble. She had ripped her arm on a chain link fance.

These days, kidsi scream if they see the ice cream truck or get touched playing tag.

As for "Shhh" working wonders? I've observed the opposite: It's worthless. Parents look so incredibly stupid when they go their lame soft "Shhhh" to quite a shrieking kid.

How about "NO, DO NOT SCREAM," in a stern voice and red-hot eye contact. I can shut any kid up with this approach. How about, "If you scream one more time, we're going home" (climbing gym).

At one job I worked at, a coworker about 20 said she flipped her car (amazingly no serious injuries) because her ADULT female passenger suddenly screamed at something, and the screaming made her lose control of the car. This is what happens when kids are permitted to scream. They bring it into adulthood. It's such a stupid, worthless response to unexpected things. Women scream if they win $20 at a raffle.

I hate screamers.

That sounds awful. I just don't see or hear it here. There are lots of little kids in my neighbourhood. Lots of them play outside either in their back gardens, or in the front with road hockey, bike riding, being pulled in wagons, etc. There's a park just doors away from me with a big playscape and a summer water park with sprinklers. Lots of toddlers and kids play there. I've never heard anything crazy, even if I'm walking right past them. Sure they might speak a little louder calling out to friends but it's not shrieking. I actually think the parents are more annoying because they're always so chatty like it's a social club. My daughter worked in a daycare for newborns to age .... I can't remember, but maybe age five ... maybe five years ago. She said the mess was a problem, but I don't remember anything about this shrieking nonsense. I'll ask her later on.

I worked with young kids a lot myself, in swim programs and art classes etc., but admittedly that was a long time ago. It sounds like a s**tshow where you are. I'd be telling the parents what I thought about it, if their kids were acting like banshees in public. I know that's not polite but really, I think I'd have to say something.

Oh yes, I hate when women scream on the radio when they've won a cash prize.

In my experience though, females have been screaming for a few centuries. When my brother screamed when he was little (which wasn't often) my parents would say "stop screaming like a girl!" But girls were told off for screaming too, but it was still more accepted for girls to scream.

But these days it's both little boys and girls alike that scream. And the parents just let them. If I were a parent I'd teach my children from a young age how to be respectful in places like supermarkets and restaurants, and if anyone showed annoyance that would encourage me to discipline my kids even more, not get offended. I remember when I was in a restaurant once and a toddler was screeching, and the mother yelled "sshh, people are trying to enjoy a meal and they don't want to hear you screaming, do they?" And the kid actually listened and quietened down. So by getting down on their level and with a bit of simple logic, it can sometimes work even on toddlers.

Like Supernanny once said, if taught correctly a (typical) child as young as 2 can learn right from wrong. My niece is 2 and she doesn't run around screaming in public, because my sister and her husband are strict with her, but not in an abusive way where she's scared or anything. She's just well-taught and is a happy, laid-back toddler. Their older daughter was the same, and still is. Two very well-behaved children. OK the toddler may have her moments but generally she's a happy little girl who behaves well in public. One time a stranger gave her a 50 pence piece because she was standing so still and quietly in a queue in the supermarket, and I suppose toddlers like that are a rarity. When we came out she was praised by her parents for being so good and quiet. If she does have a tantrum it is well-controlled by the parents and it doesn't turn into a full-on screaming the building down meltdown.