Dealing with a Abusive Party Guest

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I have a Halloween party to attend tomorrow; my best friend is hosting it, so I'm definitely going. But there's this one guy who attends who's insane. And when I say insane, he's a full-blown narcissist and verbally abusive.

It all started when I met him for the first time at the last party. I complimented his costume and said that I would vote for him in the Halloween costume competition. But I forgot to vote for him and voted for my best friend instead. I stupidly told people who I voted for when they asked me. From there, he lost it; he treated me with huge disrespect. He called me a man (even though I'm female with a baby face) and a b***h, and kept throwing insults at me throughout the party, even weird insults like, 'Your seduction tactics won't work on me' (something like that; I didn't hear it properly).

The only ones to stand up for me were a couple, specifically the boyfriend, for whom I was extremely grateful. He even shouted at him, which I loved. I wish we had more people like him and his girlfriend on this planet.

My best friend didn't really stand up for me at first, but later in the party she did tell him how much she doesn't like him and said if he crosses the line or pisses her off, she will slap him. He crazily said that he would slap her back.
Even Witty comebacks and put downs didn't work. For example when he put down my engineering degree saying unis are a waste of time and all I have is a piece of useless paper, and I quipped back to him that at least I have connections and more job opportunities, which means more access to higher income.

So, I was wondering, if I go to the party tomorrow and I see the same crazy guy again, and no one has my back, should I just insult him back? I've tried walking away, but he's so crazy he would shout insults at me from across the room. My best friend doesn't agree with uninviting him from the party this time. I'm not sure if it's because she doesn't care about my well-being or if it's because he's her boyfriend's friend and she can't tell him who to invite.

What was he on?

I have no idea.
He was drinking later in the party like the rest of the guys but he was agro (angry and hostile) throughout the whole party, from begining to end.

If this guy is so awful why is your friend inviting him in the first place? It doesn't seem like a very smart thing to do. It also doesn't seem like going to this party is your best option either, given the fact that you've been the victim of this guy's abuse and even your best friend didn't seem to care.

It's my best friend's boyfriend's friend so I don't think she has a say in him coming to the party.
I feel compelled to go since I really like to socialize and have fun and everyone is kind apart from him.
And I've been cooped up at home for too long, stuck within an abusive enviroment anyway.

It might be tough to refrain from responding, but try to ignore him totally. Narcissists hate being ignored. Trolling doesn't only happen online! Talk to others as if he isn't there.

It doesn't really sound as if your best friend has your best interests at heart.

Okay thank you for the advice.

Yeah I think you're right, since last time I visited her, she wasn't present in the house to greet me and I had to talk to her boyfriend for a while and she didn't hug me to greet me or hug me good bye either. And years ago she was making fun of me asking me if I was raised in a barn. just because I accidently reached over someone for some sauce, but I made sure to say excuse me. Back then I distanced myself from her and decided to give her one more chance but she seems to not care about my well being again.

sometimes agreeing completely with whatever a bully says in a quiet and non defensive manner will de-fuse them. Where is the fun if you don't get upset, react emotionally, or fight back. He will move on to other quarry.

Hi Cookies! I agree with Enviro, just completely ignore him. No reaction means he is not getting what he wants from you, so he will get bored and move on. Also, just keep away from him as much as possible. There is always at least one dickhead at every party. You just do what makes you happy, and try not to worry about anybody else.

I'd like to see how many of his buttons I can press.

I think that would make me look stranger if I agreed with them, or make me look really weak.
Since I've seen people agree with bullies and that didn't stop them.

But silent treatment works for some people so I'll keep that in mind.

Okay thanks for confirming that.
And that's true, there's always a party pooper when I go to a party.

The party started off really well but my friend was acting a bit cold at the end and barely talked to me, and this older women was nice to me at first but was kinda rude to me near the end of the party (I think because she didn't like it how her boyfriend was talking to me alot).

Yeah lucky he didn't show up at the party.
Since I had a feeling that I would get into a verbal argument this time.

Glad the party went fairly well, except for other women getting jealous. I think it can be hard for us to know how much we should talk to the opposite sex, if they are in a relationship with someone else. I find it easier to talk to women than I do to men, which has led to some misunderstandings in the past.

So long as you enjoyed the party overall, that’s the important thing.

See, I'd go in anticipating and desiring an argument and when it happens just start poking and prodding at buttons until he's somewhere between flustered and enraged.