Brainfart

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What kind of mistakes did you make as a result of brainfart?

When I said, "I do" for the first time.

Most recent - I tagged half a rack of clothes with $7 tags instead of $9. I had to cut all the incorrect tags off and retag with the correct price. It took time.

having had for all my life, inattentive subtype ADHD [what useta be called plain 'ol ADD], I seem to have brainfarts every GD day. I so often mishear or misconstrue what folks tell me that I can't really depend on my senses anymore.

A lot of them for most of my life.

To a point that I may not initiate anything because I know I will screw up.
And kept asking permission to do XYZ before doing something because odds that I will screw up regardless of what I feel -- because confidence isn't even my issue.


Ranging from collecting or tracking one or two things to bring only for forget the rest.
Meaning, an even more limited short term memory than I initially had which wasn't good to begin with.

The overall unable to plan several steps ahead, which I didn't had a room to learn until now.
Upside is being very present -- downside is that my past experiences is irrelevant and I cannot see the future.

The inability to shift gears. Or the overall painful difficulty performing it.
Becomes a major drainer in every aspect of my daily living.

And this chronic feeling of frustration that I should know more, I should be capable of more.
That this fog in my head is blocking me. That something is holding me back. That I really fricking hate whatever it was in my head.


Then I don't.


At the moment, I no longer been too emotionally reactive in every mistakes I've done unlike few months ago...

Shifting gears became somewhat easier to me now.
Still learning how to plan ahead. This includes communicating about my schedules.

But my short term memory still sucks.
At least I can recall way faster now, sometime before the last minutes instead of taking me half a day or a week to realize what I forgot.

And that I no longer had to ask permission of what I should do.
That my scope of awareness and reading the air is expanded enough to know how to act like one of those social creatures in synch like cooperation.

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