Standing Up to the Bullies at Work

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For many years now, a certain person been bullying me, and others, at my workplace. Up until now, he has been comfortably used to the fact that I couldn't stand up for my self as a person or me views, that I would back down in the face of his berating, and that I would let his points/ideas prevail even when they held no weight.

He and a newer guy have experienced something different from me over the last couple weeks. I have embraced my diagnosis, and added to that a strong-self awareness (and awareness of others) to become a strong supporter of myself as a human being. I am in my 50's now and it has been a long journey being on the receiving end of such treatment. I am letting these people know the game is over.

The "can never be wrong" insecure bullies out there are in a never-ending battle to project their problems onto those they perceive as weaker (those who have historically "taken it"). My special friend has even said a couple times over the last couple weeks that I was being "defensive". In other words: "please let your guard down again so I can abuse you again". That tells me I am on the right track. Nice try at gaslighting me bully. I know your simple games now.

It’s great to hear you are standing up to the workplace bullies. I have done this too in the past and it’s a good feeling

I would warn you though to be careful standing up to bullies that are in more senior positions than you, sadly this can often get you fired. With bullies in senior positions it is a good idea to respond as nicely as possible on the surface (let them know they aren’t bothering you), and make sure as much as possible of your interactions are by email, so that you have a paper trail to fall back on.

Thanks for the support everyone. I really appreciate it.

I have been careful with people above me for sure. That's good advice.

I have a history of letting all people walk all over me, whether above, same level or below. With my new ways of standing up for myself (especially mentally), there is no behavior they could pinpoint that could be characterized as hostile.

In general I have become very aware of what is going on around me, using that fine tuned autistic aspie frontal-lobe to process more information then they could ever dream of - and use that info to stay many steps ahead of them.