I need guidance

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I’ve been trying to figure out whether I’m on the autism spectrum, but finding a professional who actually understands autism in adults has been incredibly frustrating—especially in my country.

After relating a lot to the experiences of autistic people, I took the AQ-50 test (scored 36) and the RAADS-R test (scored 139), both of which suggest a strong likelihood of autism. But when I tried getting evaluated, I was dismissed almost immediately. One therapist told me I was “too smart” to be autistic, while another said that if I really had autism, I wouldn’t be able to live normally or take care of myself. She also claimed that adults can’t be diagnosed because I “would have known by now.”

The problem is, I have struggled my whole life—with feeling like I don’t belong, like I don’t truly understand people beyond a logical level, and like I’m constantly disconnected. This has been one of the biggest factors in my depression. But instead of helping, every professional I’ve seen in my country seems to follow the same outdated beliefs about autism, and there are no real resources for adults like me.

I’m reaching out because I don’t know where else to turn. I just want an honest, competent evaluation from someone who understands autism in adults. If you have any guidance or resources that could help, I’d really appreciate it.

I'm sorry to hear about your struggle. I don't know if online assessment would work for you, but NHS offers some, even if it's very expensive:

https://www.clinical-partners.co.uk/for ... utism-test

I've not used their services, but it took me a very long time to get diagnosed in my country for the same reasons.

There are only a few participants from the Middle East. Most of us are in the UK or the United States.

Many Aspies have exactly the same experiences and share them here.
It can be useful for us to learn about various ways of coping.

Wearing high fidelity earphones to concerts and movies.
Avoiding crowds by shopping early in the morning when the stores first open.

Face blindness is very common. I can't remember someone's face but can recall a three year old conversation about growing camellias, a type of flowering plant, and continue it as if it were yesterday.

That sort of memory makes normal people nervous if you do it all the time.
It is sometimes best to pretend you don't remember when you do.

Yoooo, you're in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia! I saw the coast of Saudi Arabia and maybe Jeddah when I sailed through the Suez Canal and "Red" Sea. Now, I'm in Colorado, USA. It's mountains, pine and birch trees here. People regularly mention how dry it is here since lotion is almost a necessity. Is that the same for you or does it feel humid enough next to the "Red" Sea?

Anyways, mental health stuff is highly influenced by culture. For example, the regular autism assessment is a semi-structured interview in which they 're looking at your behaviors and how you interact with the therapist. That is highly moderated by cultural factors such as appropriate eye contact, personal space, talking time, cues, etc. I don't know how mental health and autism works in Saudi Arabia. That means I can't tell you what worked/didn't work for me. However, I found this https://pubs.asha.org/doi/full/10.1044/2022_PERSP-22-00087. I can only see the abstract, so I can't say if it's good or not, but if you can find a way to get it, it might be helpful at understanding the situation with ASD in SA. It might even discuss assessments and access.

One idea is to find a Saudi that moved to the West (I saw the West because we're the ones that medically defined what is autism), became an autism evaluator, and offers virtual assessments. See if they will assess you over the internet. If you're rich, just fly to them lol. Either way, they will have the training needed for the assessment, but also understand the culture in Saudi Arabia since they lived it. If you don't feel comfortable with that, don't do it! If you're autistic, there's a good chance that the people you naturally get along with the best are also autistic. Ask those people what they think about your concern.

Peace be with you!

A few years back what was called Aspergers was lumped in with Autism. Some people today call it "high functioning Autism". I still use the term Aspergers because I feel that it is more specific.

Here is a link to a free pdf booklet describing Aspergers as an intentional (as opposed to a reflexive) life.

http://christianpioneer.com/blogarchiev ... e_2017.pdf

As a neurological variant, Aspergers would not be seen as an intrinsic defect, but rather a difference. If one has a more complex, fast, or more sensitive neurology, one would expect the avalanche of sensory and cognitive information to be challenging to process. Those who operate more by reflex can seem to have an easier time navigating through life. However, there can be rewards for having to deal with the processing as well.

My question is if you really need official diagnosis. Unless you apply for a disability pension or anything like that, I see no point in it. It may even get into way, considering how autism looks to be perceived in your country...

① Depending upon your circumstances, I agree with Hetzer. Unless you are well-established in life (a good work history and not young) might an Autism diagnosis harm you? Feeling like you don't fit in is one thing but convincing everyone else that you don't fit in is something else.

Of course, a formal diagnosis would be needed if you are looking for professional psychological help. But, again, be sure it would not cause everyone to dismiss you as sick and not worth listening to. (I was 64 when I got my diagnosis—I retired, financially comfortably, from working when I was 56. I'd been to college and I'd been in the military. I was married. I belonged to Mensa. I was not worried about what people might think!)

② If you decide it is safe and likely beneficial for you to seek a professional Autism diagnosis, perhaps using the Internet to scan college websites that might help you find researchers interested in Autism?

③ Remember there are other "things" which resemble Autism. (❶, ❷, & ❸.)

Another option may be to get a full psychological assessment if you can afford it. My partner had this done.

The way it works here is that the upper class sees a therapist for help. 1 hour sessions now go for about $200 each.
If you can afford that they will ask around and provide referrals, knowing you have the funds to pay for an expensive evaluation.

There was a job training program for adults with autism. They did not require a diagnosis as they felt that they could decide whether or not you would benefit from their program on their own. It lasted for about fifteen years and was privately run with grants and donations.

It grieves me that people in your situation are confronted with such baseless misinformation! Be assured you are not the only one so affected, as what you get from any "autism experts" is likely to be garbage. It can be resolved, but it takes a lot of work, so for now I'm just going to give you some pointers, gleamed from several years of research and debate, starting with the site Aspergia, supposedly a haven for Aspies, but where any attempt to bring clarity was soon drowned out by trolls, unhampered by the administrators.

First, a bit of history: The label Autistic originally referred to one of those aspects of the psyche which, together, determine a person's temperament and aptitudes (or, if you prefer, personality). A century ago, it was widely familiar to most researchers in the field, and in widespread use; Eugene Bleuler, for instance, used it for one of the stages of the schizophrenia he described (no causative connection, just a superficial resemblance) but the origin of this use is murky. The earliest concrete description I've discovered is in Aaron Rosanoff's Theory of personality, based on clinical experience (published in the early 1920s). This is probably what Leo Kanner drew on when coining the phrase "autism", a range of disorders that affected the kids he studied whom he considered to be strongly autistic, and so it should have remained. Unfortunately, recent practice has been to use the term for a whole range of unrelated conditions wherein the personality type is no longer even considered.

Lesson one: get over this idea of a "spectrum" to describe this grab bag; it's a complete red herring which doesn't even begin to resemble the reality. The DSM people in particular (the world's greatest authority? Don't make me laugh!) have kept adding to this collection any childhood condition they couldn't otherwise categorise.

Some good news (though it is being systematically buried) is a psychometric test based indirectly on Rosanoff's paper, and widely used by recruiters, which I took nearly 50 years ago, the first indication that I was very strongly Autistic (and nothing but: I scored average in every other category). For a short time, members here (and on several other aspie sites, but none made it a sticky...) got to enjoy a remarkably informative and free, five minute online version, which was an order of magnitude better than anything used by researchers (who would resolutely have nothing to do with it).

This would be a good point to take a pause; if you are at all interested in taking this further, you can obtain a copy of Rosanoff's theory on Google science, and the test, the Chandler & Macleod Temperament and Aptitude test, should still be available here in the archives. At the very least, you should read that thread as it has a great number of results from those who took the test, providing descriptions, some of which may apply to your case. Don't be concerned with the change in description of the various aspects, it's just another case of misplaced political correctness; referring to what was once Autistic as Artistic, or Depressive as Double guesser, changes nothing of significance.

Resources for adults are a problem in the USA as a lot of services end when you become an adult.

This may be an issue if you try to ask for resources for adults. Most likely there are none in your country.

In the USA a lot of money for disability services comes from the federal government through the Department of Education. The money is spent locally to provide services in schools.

Yes, although there's a growing amount of informal supports that are available from the community in terms of things like how to deal with common problems that don't require funding.

It's still an absolute embarrassment that the country will pay for expensive things for other disabilities, but the relatively cheap stuff that many autistic people need to manage on their own, is just not available.

Apology: My previous post may give the impression that the C&M 5 minute test is still available, which, sadly, is no longer true; one can only read about it and its output to those who took it.

This too is something of a mystery: I enjoyed a friendly dialog with Kevin Chandler, a director of the company (and grandson of one of the founders) when the test first appeared here (and Aspergia Island, Aspies For Freedom, and others) in its original form, using labels like Paranoid, Manic, and the less familiar Hysteroid, and Epileptoid (a mainstay of those diagnosed with AS, more so than the Autistic label) for the other aspects of the psyche which contribute. Then, without explanation, he stopped responding to my emails. My memory gets a bit murky after that, but at some point the test was withdrawn. Then it reappeared with those "politically correct" labels, and then it disappeared again, permanently. At some point, I discovered that Kevin had left the company, but none of my inquiries as to why were answered.

Kevin had tried to sell such a test to autism researchers worldwide, but there were no takers. This is akin to surgeons boycotting a manufacturer's products as they cut too well! Part of that may be pure "not invented here" parochialism, but it looks to me more like orders from on high, from people who are determined to prevent any clarity on all matters "autism", which absolutely stinks!

Seems too much conspiracy theory for you? How likely is it that we ended up with the mess we have today, if it wasn't deliberate?

I've read papers from the sixties complaining how "autism" research was being misdirected, derailing the whole effort, and anyone who cares to do the research will conclude that there's been no real improvement in understanding since then. Kanner's reference to the autistic personality type had already been been set aside, and then came Lorna Wing with her idiotic "spectrum" notion, showing she doesn't understand the word, and had apparently never heard of "Autistic" as an aspect of personality, driving the whole effort onto the rocks!

Then there's the strange aversion all researchers seem to have for dealing with autistic adults, as if we magically cease to exist at age 19; they won't entertain any input from those of us who are experienced enough to form our own opinions on the subject, and point out their errors!

This became noticeable on the Awares online conference, which had a "voices from the spectrum (or something like that)" section, which might as well have been a ghetto where no researcher dared to appear ( I first wrote "visit", but years later found that, in fact, some of my comments had done the rounds among researchers; they just didn't want to debate them with me...).

So who profits from this? There is an evident conflict between Autistics and the kind of people who end up in charge of everything, which they see as their natural right, when Autistics are uninterested in status, and inclined to make up their own minds about things. As far as they are concerned, we are unmanageable, and need not exist, regardless of our overwhelming contribution to all sorts of scientific and technological development; as many have observed, outside of computing, physics research has become moribund in recent decades, and the elite don't care!

Then there's the industry (sic) itself, people who can rejoice in having a job for life, as long as they don't rock the boat, and go along with the continuous muddying of the waters...