being bullied as an autistic adult

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Bullying where they act intimidatingly and sometimes physically for doing something off. I feel like neurodivergent people are more prone to for a lack of a better term "provoke them" Anyone else have similar experiences as an autistic adult? Any response would be greatly appreciated!

I was bullied in every single job I ever had, I did not get diagnosis until after I was retired. I had no idea how I made them angry and resentful, but I managed to alienate co workers every time, even though I could always do the job at hand. Sabotage and "setting me up" were common and I never understood "why" until after I got diagnosis.(5 years after I retired, when I was 68) I am sure your experience is common. Others will definitely identify.

We live in a particularly peculiar point in history. People are so thin skinned that any difference seems to trigger them to cry out against anything different. It is like the story of the princess and the pea except everyone is the princess and anything could be a "pea".

Earlier on I got bullied or found out much later that they were laughing at me. When I got in my early 30s, I decided that I would no longer get too close with co-workers but at the same time, not be too distant either. Hard to balance sometimes. This I've found has kept me out of trouble for the most part.

I very much look forward to retirement.

There is a social psychology thing called a "social breach experiment."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breaching_experiment

In such an experiment, the experimenter purposefully makes a social error, such as walking up to someone and saying "goodbye" instead of saying "hello" or paying for lunch with nothing but pennies when there is a long line behind them. The purpose is to observe the reaction of others when the social error is made.

Typical reactions to these errors are to freeze, to get away from the erroneous person, to FIGHT them, and sometimes to laugh.

The reaction is never to explain the error and ask them not to do it again. You see how if this WAS a natural neurotypical reaction to a social error, an atypical person, such as a person on the autism spectrum, would find social life much easier to navigate.

That is very interesting. Sometimes I notice the reactions of others towards someone who breaches their unspoken social rules like that and I wonder about the thoughts of each person involved. Is the person who is paying with the pennies elderly, neurodivergent, limited income, an initiate for some cult or gang, a victim of human trafficking, or something else? Any number of scenarios can be true and I feel as if I have mentally witnessed every scenario in various experiences or dimensions in that single moment. Am I the only person who sees the world this way?

Bullies do seem to hone in on people who think or behave differently. Also, they don’t seem to like individuals who can only speak the truth. Many autistics aren’t influenced by peer pressure at all, and that can anger bullies. It doesn’t matter to many of us if we are validated by them or not. That statement is merely a fact to us, not an implication of superiority or malice. Or anything.

How many of us observe everything around us in silence while our mental processes are quickly whirring?

^^^^ identify with most all the above posts especially the last one ,above^^^^

Now it will seem like I am writing excuses for people whom victimize neuro divergent individuals ( Aspies) it is terrible.
but as I have aged , have noticed many things on individual inter persons actions / reactions .
items in order:
1:Aspies have extra wiring in the brain . Perhaps this also addresses items that come under emotional reactions.
Experiences that fire ( neural connections) together wire together. So repitition of victimization will ,will automatically trigger pathways from previously noted experiences . And over the years when these become prevalent ( repeated and repeated) Strong Connections . Some people used to refer to this as wearing your feelings on your cuff. It most likely is in fact a early learned ptsd response possibly. For self preservation ! ( but careful not to react/ over react)
2: Stupidity is a most common problem in those that engage in bullying type behaviour. And if they can cause a adverse response, in their intended target, fear/ anxiety, whatever. It makes them feel just as they might have, when in a group of bullies,even back to their own childhoods.Maybe a sense of commradarie,or bonding with the buddies,triggering their own reward response "in their own brains" . (No thinking required) for them . And if they think everyone is just like them, in their world, They expect that mental reward response in their heads. It is fun to be mean and , see the response in their victims. perhaps still mentally believing everyone is like them. .
3: Have over the years , if you can fake it till you make it.And get the hec away. Masking as best as your brain will do.
If those bullies get that anxiety response in you, ( that they can observe) It fuels their dopamine response in their brains . Often acknowedging in your brain/ thoughts ,that obviously there is a difference between you and your possible aggressor .And if you can keep that in the back of your head at all times if possible, if engaged in such situations.
Your brain will not get swallowed up by your own anxiety as quickly. Allowing you to apply your thinking on best ways to exit( get out) of those circumstances. Maybe even keeping your brain more limber,to think.
best wishes your own situations to all.

A lot of Aspies work too hard at their jobs.
This is bad because it raises the expectations of what is required on the job.
The natural reaction of other employees is to get rid of someone who is working too hard.

You can see this on Television if you watch the Survivor shows.
Those who do too much get voted off the show.

I was bullied my whole life, only I didn't know it was bullying. "Everybody makes mistakes". "It's ok, I have a lot of patience and I can stay calm". "That person didn't mean that, maybe they are tired". And so on.

Now that I got my diagnosis (at 35) I'm starting to pay attention to how people treat me. What I see is... not good.

Yes .. exactly same situation lost me my civil service job. Could have retired from that job.. And I kinda enjoyed it
And would hide out after I finished . The workload from the day. Did not know, Was making anybody look bad.
When assigned to other peoples jobs ,where I worked to cover them when they were on vacation. Would finish their jobs hours early. And would dally as much as I could think to justify my time.Still ended up hour shorter . For their job.
They went a long ways to go out of their way. To get me to give up the job.

I also had a lying a-hole boss who tried to bully me into quitting. But I wasn't going to give the SOB the satisfaction. I refused to quit on anyone's terms but my own. He knew -- probably before I did -- that there was something "off" with me. He also knew that since this was my first full-time job that I didn't know I had tools I could use like making an HR complaint. In the end, he's the one who quit -- and my life got infinitely better after that.

I remember having some bullying happen to me at my first job (in retail) but I don't think it was related to my neurodivergence, but instead due to them perceiving me as queer.

More subtle making fun of me for my eating habits very much has been a thing at every single job I have worked, though. Along with me treated like a child.

Being bullied for being autistic is not okay, and it's frustrating how a lack of understanding can lead people to act intimidatingly or even physically. It might help to connect with communities-either online or locally-that are supportive and understand the challenges neurodivergent people face.

It's happened pretty much every year of my sad, sorry life.

I've had mild bullying at school and then in the workplace. The pattern it generally follows is this: I don't respond to things the way others expect me to; they see this as 'aloof'; they actually think I regard myself as superior to others, when the opposite is the case. Inside, I am feeling like a complete loser who doesn't understand what's going on around me, but I'm silent and expressionless and others interpret that as 'aloofness' or 'arrogance'.

One of the reasons I want a diagnosis is I think a lot of this stuff would stop if colleagues knew I was neurodivergent rather than rude and uncaring.

I was bullied by some female coworkers at my first job because they knew that there was something off about me.