Do you think that NTs have bigger ego than us?

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Do you think that NTs have bigger ego than us? I think their sense of self is more stable and rigid and dismisses many things that are different, but i believe that neurodivergent brains are more unbiased and open to everything resulting to less ego

From an NT perspective, autistic people are sometimes thought of as inaccurately having disproportionately large egos.

There can be some truth to that - a lot of people on the spectrum seem to have narcissistic traits that can present itself as egocentrism.

From my own experiences being a part of autistic communities, I would say that a lack of ego or a weak ego can be present in autistic people too, with some autistic folk having traits such as humility, constraint and modesty in abundance.

I think autistic people are born that way, while Narcism and egocentrism are developed in the biographie of the Individual. Neurodivergent and Neurotypical People can be narcistic oe egocentric.
I don’t think that there are significant tendences in such a direction.Please corect my if im wrong.
Sorry for my basic Englisch, if somone struggles, just ask.

No.
Just more regulated.
And in some cases, just as hidden, just as subtle.

It's not a matter of narcissism/pride/self centeredness, self esteem/self and identity, empathy/sympathy/allocentry/prosociality, or assertiveness/assurance/confidence/apathy/rigidity or whatever trait that makes someone be able to steamroll others.


A fragile ego is like acting as if one has chronic illness; except internally and very dependent on the external.
It is not born out of lack of reference or habit to be allocentric or acting pro-socially, it is simply born from having a whatever kind of lack that's more akin to hunger for reassurance.
The "lack" can be managed, but rarely ever overcame and solved. It's like a form of greed as it's source of security.

Having a weak ego is not the same as being fragile or pliant; being pliant can be a choice born from being able to regulate, and fawning is not necessarily a primary reason for it.
Having a weak ego is more akin to confusion, cluelessness and directionlessness, one born from confusion or a weak/distorted internal compass.

A smaller ego is simply an ego that's easier to control. It is not necessarily weak or fragile, but it can appear as if it's pliant or unambitious or seemingly not as prideful.
It is simply manageable, simply easier to ignore, easier to carry. Easier to be content.

The inverse can be said with a bloated ego; which is simply harder to regulate, harder to rein from whatever views, ideas, habits and expectations it picks up. It can also just as mimic fragile egos.
They struggle with excess, not lack.
And it's more of a form of addiction than something like being constantly mindful or being greedy over.


Many so called lack of empathy types act more pro-socially.
Not because they're socialized well, but because they have a very twisted idea of how the world works and just decided to play with the rules of the stupid game.
If they're ethical with the way these types navigate, there's no reason to antagonize them.

Their mask is not some fawning that shields them from getting bullied or rejected, it's their weapon or poison of choice.



To me, ego is just one of the countless complicated stuff to regulate as a human. And it just happened to be one of the most complicated thing to manage.

It's almost no different to regulating one's own thoughts and emotions, except on a different level altogether and in concert, uses one's own intelligence against themselves.

Like one had to go beyond feel goods and feel bads, all the ideas of right and wrong...

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According to one largely forgotten theory, egos come in two types, one embedded in the Paranoid aspect of the psyche, the other in the Autistic aspect. Most people have a bit of both, though they are quite different; the Paranoid ego seeks status and the approval of others.

Everyone has an ego and it is not possible to measure an ego

Eight billion people in the solar system. Plenty of neurotypicals and plenty of autistics

Not all neurotypicals have the same size ego

Not all autistics have the same size ego

Plenty of factors determine ego size. Autism might be just one of them

It appears to me that neurotypicals are used to being in the majority. And autistics are used to being overpowered, outnumbered, and outsmarted. However everyone has subconscious biases. It is not possible to measure biases. On the other hand, this whole paragraph is just my opinion, not a fact, law, geometric proof, or algebraic axiom

I think they may be more attached to having their self-esteem stroked (flattery), but I don't know for sure. All I know is that I have ASD and flattery doesn't really cut it with me, yet it's so common that I guess it must work quite well on people in general. And there seems to be a lot of people out there who bang on about how they deserve more goodies than they've got, how they were robbed and what a terrible shame it is that they're not higher up in the food chain. They rarely say "I don't understand your behaviour," they say instead "you have something wrong with you." They confuse what they personally want with what is just and fair. Dale Carnegie wrote books about how to manipulate people by feeding their egos.

It's possible that we're more like objective robots with less of an ego to bruise, like an AI chatbot. Not that I think we have no pride at all, I just think we might keep it in proportion better.

I know what you mean, although I probably wouldn't have termed it as ego.

It seems to me more like a self-confidence within NTs as opposed to the low or fluctuating self-esteem that often plagues us autistics. This enables NTs to stand up for themselves and advocate to get what they want, which often we struggle or fail to do in an effective manner.

Suposedly, we are the egocentric ones, in terms of having difficulty recognising and appropriately responding to the needs of others. I think that label is unfair on us, but probably not really fair to apply wholesale to NTs either.

Edit: I feel the same that autism allows us to actually be quite open and non-judgemental compared to NTs.

No, I don't believe NT vs. ND is a significant factor when it comes to how large one's ego is.

I think there is a difference between a self and an ego, the self being the inside and the ego being the outside. In my opinion allistic people lead fully equipped egos to the outside in an intuitive way that always surprises me. While I just have a self that doesn’t fit into NT society.
I can only speak for myself and not for all autistic people, but for me it’s the main difference to allistics. So maybe autistics are more self centred and allistics have the “bigger” ego.