Editing question...

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I was wondering if somebody would be up for the challenge of editing a paper that I wrote for English class. It is an argumentative, and I will not have a chance to have the teacher look at it until it is time to be turned in. We did peer editing in class today, and I find myself disagreeing with the person who edited my paper, and a bit leery of taking her suggestions since the first thing I saw on the paper she was previously editing (we traded because I was the only one in the class without a partner to work with, lol-go figure) was a change from the word "one" to "ones", when it was clear it should be "one" to begin with.

*The paper itself has to do with my views on whether or not vaccinations are linked as a sole cause of autism, so if you feel strongly that they are, or do not like reading about this stuff, lol, you might want to stay clear.

Got As in every English class I took. As it is our first language after all.
I have nothing better to do with my life, so sure Ill help you out.
Are you in college? I always thought you were older than someone who takes English classes.

Yep, at 27 I finally decided to go back since I got some help with daycare and the older child is in school. Thanks a TON! I usually do very well in English and always have, so I'm confused as to what is wrong with this paper, lol. But hey, I am always open to suggestions to make it better-I do get very wordy and confusing despite doing well, and randomness seems to come with essays sometimes as my thoughts flow. I'll PM it to ya

Butcher it up if you need to, lol. I'm open to criticism.

Cool ok.

Well, it seems tangential speech is an AS symptom. It IS crazy how some english "teachers" are. Well, they ARE "teachers" after all. You KNOW you have a problem with education when companies like sylvan learning centers pop up. They are basically saying that THEY will teach your child if she/he isn't being taught by the people our tax dollars pay for.

lol, 'tis true. I just knew I was in trouble when her hand popped up to trade with me... I've edited hers before, and a few others in our classes that simply didn't make much sense. With me, I say WAY too much sometimes trying to get a point across, with them it seems they don't say enough. Does that make sense? Maybe she is onto something, but isn't filling in the blanks on how to correct the entire sentence around the one word that is changed... still unsure. Her main focus though was that lack of transition... so I added a "first" "second" and "last", which to me, sounds kind of goofy... but if that is how it should be, then it will stay that way.

Yeah, I tried to maintain the flavor of what you provided. But HEY, you made some good points. Why is it that so many here see it and it seems nobody else has? I understand why WE see it. We looked at the transitions, of the criteria, etc.... I understand why the average person doesn't. They simply believe "the experts". But those others are either stupid, evil, or just super careless. I just haven't been able to deterine which.

Well, that, and I think a lot of parents just don't want to think something so horrible (in their view, or depending on the severity of the child's autism of course) could happen to their child. They NEED something to blame, and go figure, it is the parents pushing the issue of the vaccinations. It's like they form this opinion, then push it as hard as they can, disregarding what other "experts" have said lead to it.

I must wonder, if it was vaccinations, it just seems there would be more cases of it even, than what there are now. Wouldn't just about EVERYBODY have it if that was the sole cause? It is definitely a big chunk of disgruntled parents needing something to blame, and lacking motivation to find all possibilities of the cause. Instead, they think "vaccinations... autism... talking age..." lol, rather than the overall. But then again, when you read what some of these parents have to say, I'm not all that surprised that they won't bend on their opinion. A lot of them don't even take into consideration whether or not their child is happy, or whether or not the co-morbids can be helped... they just want to gripe about how hard their own life is vs. the child's.

I'm not saying some aren't having it really rough, and would like a definitive cause... it just seems the one that they picked doesn't quite cover all of the bases. There are just too many possibilities as to what could make the numbers rise.

As far as the paper goes, lol, I'll say it again. Thank you both

I think I need to make the thesis stronger, as well as the conclusion, rather than a question for both. I am just not quite sure what to do with it. Though, I see nothing wrong with leaving it as a question, to give the reader something to think about, but I think I'm supposed to stay firm with it rather than asking...