Did you feel naive?

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I'm at university now, and while I'm able to make friends and socialize, I realize I am very naive for my age. It's like I'm inexperienced in life. I've never had a boyfriend, for instance, and am only just learning to flirt, and it is quite a mechanical and practiced thing for me (yes, I practice flirting, and I practice smalltalk too, lol).

I don't worry about the fact that I am introverted, because I've struck a balance and I've got a couple good friends, so I'm content.

But I DO worry about the fact that I don't have as many life experiences as other people my age. I don't want people to judge me or take advantage of me based on that.

Anybody ever feel this way?

Yes, I can definitely relate.

Wow, do I feel that way. I just really don't get how life works, I guess. I was so naive in college that I got my English degree, honestly believing that I could make a living as a writer (I started out in journalism). Well, in order to make a living doing that you must have a certain social panache, something I sure as hell don't have. And it seems like everyone but me was having sexual experiences in high school. Looking back, I wish to hell I had had that kind of fun in high school, but then I also ask myself, "And how could we have made that happen?" If someone was interested in me, I totally misread it.

You probably aren't as naive as you think. It's more a question of having a different field of knowledge.

For example, there's a pretty large group of people who never figure out how to balance need for personal space/time with need to socialize. That alone is worth a lot.

Besides, as long as you don't have to stop conversations to ask what words mean because you have no clue... at the age of 20... and the people you ask suggest you should go ask your significant other... you're probably nowhere near as bad as I was. Till about a year ago, and I'm 24.

I also didn't consciously notice guys existed in a romantic way instead of a friend way till I was a couple months short of 19, and I am either NT or extremely mild. So don't worry about it; not least because it's much easier to say no and change to yes than to say yes and change to no, even about stuff like holding hands or kissing. Yes, I have a boyfriend; of 2 1/2 years at this point.

We're just prettier, and most of them haven't grown up enough yet till college anyway. I really do mean it about not worrying about it, 'cause it isn't worth the effort. It will happen when it happens. Getting attached to the wrong one first because you were in a rush hurts BAD.

oh yea, i felt very naive when i was about 21 at college. i really didnt have clue about a lot of things. i guess it's only natural for us aspies. i also noticed that when i passed to highschool eveybody had changed but me.

imo we have to learn some things by willforce. I'm not nearly as naive as i was, im now 27 and i feel much more focused, but it didn't come without work.

trusting and boundaries go hand in hand

Absolutely!

Allthough I don't think I realised it at the time - but looking back at past incidents in my life I just see that I was totally naive about lots of things.

Yep, pretty naive over here.

I used to be naive, especially when people would tell me what the "meaning" of a sexual slang term was... Nowadays, I can cross-reference with Wikipedia before I make an ass of myself...

I sometimes feel naive but I feel as though I get better as I get older. I'm not that daft, though - that's something I inherited from the good (mother's) side. If I feel that I'm being diddled there is no way I will stand for it.

Whereabouts are you from in England OP if you don't mind me asking?

This thread is very familiar, I'm 26 and most people think I'm still in high school and naive for a teenager.

I was wondering how people cope with this in the workforce?

It can work to my advantage, or usually at least not to a disadvantage, with friends and sometimes works as "cute" when "flirting" but in work situations it is becoming increasingly difficult.

I do freelance work that is primarily research related and pictorial (non-social) but when dealing with clients I find they have trouble taking me seriously. They patronize me and try and deal with my "partner" who does none of the work and is really only there to help with social confidence. I had a client last night who actually pinched my cheek!

Does anyone have tips to work around this? It goes further than the naive thing and more into the general AS side, I guess...

I feel the same way, almost 22 years old now and starting to feel like I should put the effort in to experience the things people were doing 8 years ago that I was somehow oblivious to.

um....yes, especially here. I am 35 years old and a lot of you are younger than me and live in a different generation than me (I remember floppy discs that were actually floppy). You all talk about computer games and anime stuff I totally do not understand, and on-line dating, what is that??? See, what a minute, may I just feel stupid instead of naive!

But as for the flirting thing, practice it online, it is easier to flirt on a message board (does not necessarily have to be this one) than in real life, but it can give you some practice.

But then again, I am 35 old, boring and getting dumber by the day!

I definately HAVE BEEN naive...
Now I don't really consider myself at all naive but often get paranoid that others do think that about me...