Emotional attachment to objects - an AS thing?

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Shebakoby
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04 Sep 2010, 2:37 am

There was a story in the news about a year ago, about a man in japan whose ill mother came to live with him. He had a very large collection of Gundams, much of which was assembled from kits. His mother surruptitiously threw the gundams out. Guy threw a fit and burned down his house (and nearly killed himself).

Now people will say, "Gawd, it's only objects, why react so extremely?"

Part of the story had the english translation of the guy's explanation. Now the translation MAY be 'off', but it was quoted as he thought the Gundams were his "Partners", or "friends". And his mother threw them out, enraging him.

It did not say whether he had AS.

But I have to wonder. I have very strong emotional attachments to inanimate objects. How does this happen? Is it an AS thing? Or does it happen to Neurotypicals too? And how to you "fix" such a thing, if it can be shown that such an attachment occurs to the detriment of being able to connect with people? Or is it a result of being unable to connect with people and is thus the last resort of the lonely?



Poppycocteau
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04 Sep 2010, 3:50 am

I get very attached to objects too . . . I feel really sad if something I'm attached to is damaged or lost, and go into a sort of period of mourning for it. Hair bobbles, bras, sweatshirts, socks, knickers, stationery . . . lots of things.

Why would his mother throw the Gundams (whatever they are) out? That was a nasty thing to do, especially since he was looking after her.


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Pseudeos
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04 Sep 2010, 4:23 am

When I was twelve, I had a purple hat, which I really liked. Even though it was only a hat and I was old enough to not act so immaturely (I was about 12) I started crying and my mental age temporality regressed by at least a decade :/


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Apple_in_my_Eye
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04 Sep 2010, 4:33 am

I remember a story about a woman who married the Eiffel Tower, and another who married part of the Berlin Wall or something. One of them popped up an a forum and mentioned having Asperger's. There was a word for that, but I can't remember what it is.

Ok, found that article I saw:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstop ... Tower.html

When I was a kid I did feel attached to objects a lot. As I got older I tried to consciously tune it out because it would get to be too much and would get in they way of rationally functioning -- like if I needed a box of sugar, and there's only two left on the store shelf, and if I buy one, then the other will be all alone... poor box of sugar... and then, "WTH am I thinking? I only have room for one box and I'm tired and need to go home NOW. Argh." ;)

I don't know if it's a common thing, but I remember reading Donna Williams mentioning in one of her books attachments to objects, or projecting life onto non-living things.

As to why, it seemed to me like empathy run amok. Or something.

As far as the guy burning his house down; that does seem extreme. Throwing out his entire handmade collection (even if it was model airplanes or something) seems really obnoxious, though, even just in terms of all the lost effort and work.



Last edited by Apple_in_my_Eye on 04 Sep 2010, 4:47 am, edited 1 time in total.

Leekduck
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04 Sep 2010, 4:45 am

yes it is a sign of autism, infact its one of the most prominent symptoms



Moog
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04 Sep 2010, 4:50 am

I once read about some guy who married a car.

I don't particularly feel emotional about objects more than people, but I do tend to relate to objects more than people. For example, when shown a photograph album, I'm more likely to talk about the interesting quality of old photographs, or discuss objects in the photographs, rather than the people that were supposed to be the main focus.


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Pistonhead
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04 Sep 2010, 4:53 am

Married a car? Dang I'm not even that obsessed! I'd rather have a car "party" than go monogamous with one car /jk


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CockneyRebel
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04 Sep 2010, 6:58 am

I'm emotionally attatched to my Routemasters. Those buses remind me of the London that I fell in love with, before I was in High School. The London that some politician promised that he wouldn't do away with. His name is not worthy of my words.


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Skilpadde
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04 Sep 2010, 8:19 am

I understand the extremeness of his reaction very well. I hate people giong through my stuff, ragardless of what I think about the stuff, and heaven help the person who would throw away my possessions. I don't need to be overly attached to them to feel like that. It's very simple, they are my possessions and my to do as I please with.

That said, there are objects I am very attached to. There have been objects I have mourned when they were gone. (My family's first car, the first mix master, our first washing machine, our first oven.) It's not like losing a family member or a beloved pet of course, but it's a sense of sorrow just the same. And yes, I cried.

According to my mother it's not uncommon for females to get attached to things and machines. She is fond of the car we have now, and she has said that she dreads the day she'll have to give it up.

There's a huge difference though, between being attached to things (like I am), and having object(um) sexuality where people wish to marry a thing and thinks the thing likes them back.


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Asp-Z
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04 Sep 2010, 10:52 am

I bet an NT would act in a similar way if he'd been collecting and building the things for ages.

It isn't an AS thing at all. Plenty of NTs get emotionally attached to objects too.



primaloath
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04 Sep 2010, 11:01 am

I don't like throwing things out, destroying things or wasting them. In fact, I'm still wearing some clothes that had been bought eight years ago. My laptop accidentally fell once, and I felt very bad - not because of what I might have lost, but because of the damage I may have caused to it. I also keep the toys I had been given in recent years, though I stopped playing with them last year (I was ~23).

I also get attached to concepts and beliefs... I used to find it particularly uncomfortable to delete things I had written down (when editing a story I wrote) and cared very much for the concepts presented in online role-playing intensive MUD worlds. I would also feel very bad about destroying the last copy of someone's book if that were ever an option.

I'm not sure whether all this is normal.



buryuntime
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04 Sep 2010, 11:32 am

Yes, I had rather extreme attachment to objects as a child. I don't think I had special interests in the subject-sense then. I would have violent fits if one of them was taken away from me. Now I'm really possessive, but my attachment isn't as bad. If I forget an object to bring somewhere with me at home I will not react hysterically anymore.



jmnixon95
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04 Sep 2010, 11:48 am

Oh God, I have emotional attachments to objects and I find it extremely annoying.
I feel sad for the food when the food is thrown away; I feel happy for the book that gets chosen. I feel the pain of the empty playground; I am glad to see all of the chairs in a classroom occupied, with none left out.
I really wish there was a way to overcome it.



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04 Sep 2010, 12:15 pm

I've grown out of a few. Ie. My mom used to buy me those horrible jelly faced pops and I wouldn't dare eat it because I would be hurting spongebob or whoever it was. However, important items to me like my Calculator I still act emotional with.



Shebakoby
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04 Sep 2010, 5:35 pm

when granny traded in her 81 Pontiac Lemans that she'd had for over nearly 20 years, I cried.

I get very emotionally attached to objects. Cars, stuffed animals, other toys.

I think it's because we instinctively know that objects cannot reject us, whereas living things (particularly humans) can and do.



Michhsta
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04 Sep 2010, 6:03 pm

I am terrifyingly and obsessively attracted to books. All my favourite books are covered with plastic and are in MINT condition. I have been known to throw a complete tantrum if my son leaves a book on the floor, or does not treat it with the respect it deserves. He thinks I am nuts.

I constantly dust my books to make sure they don't get dirty and I have a heirarchy system. My most precious books have the top shelf where they are safe from wandering hands and then each shelf below that denotes the importance of that book. My partner has caught me holding books up to my face and smelling them while grinning with my eyes closed and whispering sweet nothings to it.

And people wonder why I am in therapy :wink: Give me a book over a person any day.

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