I need advice on Aspergers

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Hi,

I need advice from people with Aspergers, or people who know someone with it.

There is a guy at work who we are sure has Aspergers. He's a nice guy and we care about him a lot. Sometimes he says he's different to everyone else, when we pick up on what he calls his "funny ways".

He probably thinks he's different because he's been profoundly deaf, but he now has a cochlear implant so he can hear speech and socialise properly.

The thing is this:

I think he'd get a lot of good from speaking to other people with Aspergers - he'll realise he's not the only person who thinks like he does. But everyone else thinks he'll get very upset if he finds out there's "something wrong with him" and we mustn't say anything to him about it.

Should we let him be oblivious?

Thanks.

You don't say how old he is but to be honest, if he's gone through life being happily oblivious to it and doesn't want to be labelled 'different' then i'd leave him to it.

The fact that he's holding down a job and a lot of people care about him all work in his favour. I wouldn't make a big deal of it unless he comes to you and asks for specific help/advice. I know my son would prefer to be going through life without being diagnosed as AS. Unfortunately that wasn't an option for him as he needs very real help in certain aspects of his life.

Don't fix what ain't broke - that's my motto!! And good on you for caring so much.

He's in his late twenties. He's always been happy with his life and his routines, and fills his spare time watching sport.

That is until a few months back, when he suddenly decided he wanted a girlfriend. He's had a few dates, but without going into details a couple of them seemed to use him for his money.

He asks our advice because he doesn't seem to be able to "read people". He takes everything literally and can't see if someone's pulling a fast one.

I also thought it would help him if he could learn how other Asperger's begin to understand people's feelings. This is something he has real difficulty with.

Maybe in time he'll just learn to judge people for himself. Otherwise he's perfectly happy!

So I'll take your advice - as long as he's not getting upset about it, I'll leave him to his own devices.

Thanks.