Oh crap...

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I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and ever since i made the appointment I've been trying to play it out in my head, but i really don't know what i'm supposed to say. It's taken me years to pluck up the courage to actually try to get help (for the depression. I don't mind the AS really) and now that it's tomorrow i'm totally panicking. I've never been alone in a room with someone I don't know before. I always got my mum to come in with me. But she wont be there. she wont even know I'm there. No one knows i'm there. I'm scared that he's not going to believe me or take me seriously. No one ever does. everyone says i'm over-reacting and attention seeking, but really, i amn't. I never even talk about anything unless i'm hoping for help. and that's rare coz until recently i'd completely given up. But the friends i have now have managed to make me admit that i'm depressed. I've never said it aloud, but i know they're right. I never wanted to use the word 'depressed' before because of poeple who use it so lightly and joke about it, and it ISN'T something to be joked about. But yeah. i'm rambling. Basically, i'm terrified that the doctor is going to think the same. That i'm over-reacting. That because i'm only 16, i can't possibly be depressed, because there's nothing to be depressed about. i KNOW that. but that only makes it worse. ARGH, this is so frsutrating

rant over

sorry

You gotta sit right down ,take a deep breath, then write down what you need to say tomorrow...1,what are the symptoms of dep. that are bothering u? Is anxiety a big part of the problem? 2, How are you sleeping? Do you wake in the night, wake early or late, have bad dreams? 3, Are you eating properly, 4, have you thought about harming yourself, 5,Anything else you want to say. Then u can use letter as a script or even just hand it over and let doc read it. PM me if u wanna talk more.

Thanks. I think I'll do that. the only problem with that is that i never write anything down because of the irrational fear that someone will find it and read it. But that probably will be a hell of a lot easier than trying to talk to the doctor. I don't htink I've ever talked aloud about anything, apart from the occasional comment. Anyone i've told, i've told over msn messenger.
I'm just scared i'm gonna walk in, sit down, stare at the ground and not say a word. Like i used to when i was a kid and barely ever spoke and my mum was trying to get me to talk to someone.
I think i just need to stop worrying about it and just do it. the more i worry, the more likely i am to panic and relapse into silence. But yeah, if i write it down, i wont have to talk anyways. Thanks

i know just what u mean, maybe 60/70% of the times i've seen docs about mental health issues i've clammed up- so i eventually hit on writing it down. i know its scary havin stuff writen down, but do it tonight, then u can destroy it 2moro. B strong, your not alone in the problems your having...It's the scenery of Planet Asperger. Z.

WOW you're only 16 and you made your own doctor's appointment and everything? You are doing a better job than you think. As for having nothing to be depressed about, you are not as messed up as you think. There are plaenty of people that are depressed for 'no reason' crap, if I had to go back to being 16 I would have a heart attack right now. Look, even if the doctor doesn't believe you, at least you can say that you did everything you could. I've been dpressed serveral times- and here's what I've learned: Being dpressed means there are a lot of things you can't do- but there is only one thing you need to do- get yourself in a situation where you can get help. And you've done that. So in a weird way, even though you are afraid, you've already won over the things you fear. Trust me, you're more than halfway there. Don't be sorry, you have nothing to be sorry for.