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Sapphix
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15 Oct 2007, 9:22 pm

I've had a succession of great jobs in the past decade, but each time I've run away after a meltdown at the office. I haven't been fired, and perhaps my employers would have understood, but each time I felt too ashamed to return. Its a pity that I didn't know about AS then, because I would have been more gentle on myself if I had known.

Needless to say, I'm fortunate to be working from home now as a freelancer. I don't make a lot of money, but I pay my bills. Most of the time, I receive written briefs and can deliver good work without too much interaction with my clients. Today, I had to meet with one of my clients face to face. I couldn't understand her verbal instructions. Actually, its not that I don't understand. But when I'm feeling nervous and someone is talking, all I hear is a string of words and I don't know what to reply when a question is aimed at me. But I know that once she sends me the written brief, it will be clear to me and she will be impressed with the work that I do.

Today, when I started feeling as if I was zoning out when she was talking, I didn't get flustered or angry with myself. I simply told her that I would best be able to respond to a written brief, and left it at that. She didn't seem surprised and was happy to oblige. So I guess I'm learning that I'm not powerless over some of the less attractive aspects of my traits. I don't have to try and change who I am, but when I'm honest with others about my difficulties, they respond well and don't judge me. Perhaps I am just lucky with this particular example, but it seems to me that there is something I can do to make my life easier for myself and others.



Spaceplayer
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15 Oct 2007, 9:27 pm

"I've had a succession of great jobs in the past decade, but each time I've run away after a meltdown at the office. I haven't been fired, and perhaps my employers would have understood, but each time I felt too ashamed to return. Its a pity that I didn't know about AS then, because I would have been more gentle on myself if I had known."

Story of my life! Glad you found a solution to it. :)



richardbenson
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15 Oct 2007, 9:58 pm

congrats my man. im probably going to go back to work eventually i just need to get my life together first. i should be back in the workforce no later than in two years


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shopaholic
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16 Oct 2007, 6:05 am

Spaceplayer wrote:
"I've had a succession of great jobs in the past decade, but each time I've run away after a meltdown at the office. I haven't been fired, and perhaps my employers would have understood, but each time I felt too ashamed to return. Its a pity that I didn't know about AS then, because I would have been more gentle on myself if I had known."



Yes, this has happened to me also. I was screaming at my boss (who was being pretty unfair to me at the time by blaming me for someone else's misundertanding) and I was actually on the point of throwing his coffee mug across the room, just as the manager of another department, with whom I was meant to be working on a project, came in.

I knew there was no way I could ever live that down, so I had to quit.

And I loved that job - just not my boss.

Looking back now, he was obviously assuming the misunderstanding was my fault because he thought I was trying to manipulate a situation to my advantage, when in reality I was just being oblivious!



Sapphix
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16 Oct 2007, 7:08 am

shopaholic wrote:

Looking back now, he was obviously assuming the misunderstanding was my fault because he thought I was trying to manipulate a situation to my advantage, when in reality I was just being oblivious!


Yes, that is a familiar scenario. My intense reactions are considered to be some form of politics that I couldn't understand if I tried. And then trying to explain that is even more frustrating because it sounds defensive. Given a little space, I can think of a better way of responding to misunderstandings, but while I'm in the middle of it, logic doesn't apply. Thanks for your understanding.



Spaceplayer
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16 Oct 2007, 8:32 am

Shopaholic, just so you know, I didn't write that, I was quoting Sapphix from the first post. :)



shopaholic
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16 Oct 2007, 9:02 am

Spaceplayer wrote:
Shopaholic, just so you know, I didn't write that, I was quoting Sapphix from the first post. :)


Yeah,

Something must have screwed up when you tried to quote.

You need to leave the "[quote =....]" etc in at the start & end so it comes out in a white box in your post.