Handling Ignorance

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I am fuming as I sit here hurting. I have been stressed and my sensory has been unbelievable today. I had a teacher who chose me and a few others to read our writings out loud. First of all, making me read my own work aloud is really hard. To make me stand before the class, a chosen few, and do it is horrifying. I was trembling so badly, my friend could see it from her seat in the back of the room. I was crying and shaking and I pleaded with him (taking him aside) and reminded him this was a major part of my disability (have have severe social/anxiety problems). I was told I needed to "face my fears" and "get over it"! Afterwards, he said it was great, then proceeded to rip apart the depressive nature of my paper! It was a personal writing about a song that speaks to you. Mine is "If I Close My Eyes Forever" by Ozzy Osborne. My choice! My feelings, yet he tells me I'm wrong. He even made a comment about me needing psychological help if I really feel that way! (I posted my paper on my Myspace if anyone wants to judge for themselves! My name is Annabel Lee on there and email is [email protected]) In front of the class, he does/says all of this. He was not quiet about lecturing me about using my autism as an "excuse". If I were prepared to do this, I may have just gritted my teeth. I was suddenly put into the spotlight after being humiliated by having my condition announced and denounced before the entire class.
Does anyone else get stuff like this, this kind of mistreatment? I am still shaky several hours later.

Ignorance can be remedied. The problem is stupidity.

Does your school have disability services? That is bullsh*t. I understand facing your fears, but you were thrown into the fire. That was rotten.

Are your parents supportive of you? Have them go to the principal and if he/she doesn't do anything, go over their heads. Parents are more powerful than the school would like you to believe. I was a student teacher for a semester; I know of the fear that principals feel about what potentially virulent parents could make happen in a school.

You were wronged. As long as the DSM claims AS as a disability, then we should be able to get full rights and protection from others according to what the equal rights act and all that other BS that occasionally serves a purpose.

Congratulations. I've just made you my new special interest. Okay, so check this out:

yes i had similar experiences in school. once we were to write poems based on a theme and style of existing poetry. I wrote mine based on a beatles song that inspired me, which was written in a poetry style. I was also asked to read mine aloud and ended up with everyone either snickering or looking at me like a weirdo and the teacher being concerned about me psychologically. I guess the beatles or ozzy can write something, and it's considered a talented work of art, but I guess that's not what they expect in public school. You're expected to tow the line and write about the same things other children your age would pick to write about..

Everyone else wrote very unmoving, uninspired, uncreative lines on mundane topics. Nothing that could be considered "works of art", that's for sure..

I occasionally used to to get people telling me how I should be, but that's typical of a lot of older obnoxious people who think they know what's right for society or even you. Some of them are hypocrites. Most of them think that you being 19 or younger explains why you think what you think.

I don't think it's wrong for people to think that you're using autism as an excuse, so long as you can help it--if practicing having social skills and learning them helps you get over it, it's not much of an excuse. But asking you to get over repetitive behavior or speaking to people when you don't need to (ie, the chatty stuff that most stereotypical NT teen girls might engage in) harms no one, and is completely irrelevant. I might have believed that your teacher was trying to encourage you to share what you had to write about what you feel, but then he went on to telling you how you should and shouldn't feel, which is, in my opinion, wrong. You can't help but feel the way you feel, or not feel, in my case. I know I'm not great at English, but what I do know is that the teacher should grade your paper based on how you wrote it and how you conveyed your ideas; not necessarily on what you wrote, as long as it is relevant and not offensive. If you wrote something disgusting and tasteless, ie, something an insane person or Hitler might write, he might have been justified in saying you were wrong, but there's a huge difference between being autistic and being a psychopath.

I used to have problems with presenting papers in front of class because I sporadically get fits of laughter, and my mind tends to wander off onto the wrong tangents at the wrong moments. I also used to be shy as well, so it didn't help, and I would always worry about it a lot. It's getting easier though, but my brain still puts lots of emphasis on presentations. To help with the spastic laughter, I would avoid people's faces and stare at the back wall instead, or some blank spot somewhere in the room. At the very least, since there might be lots of people, it would be difficult for people to tell if I'm staring at them or staring at the back wall.

I once did a presentation in class in high school, and didn't do the presentation too well, but my teacher didn't humiliate me in front of class.

Angelus-Mortis,

You don't understand. Doing this was not only upsetting for AnnabelLee, but it could have led her to sound stupid in front of others, etc... and make the problem WORSE! If the idea is to have her get over her fears, it should start out in a more secure environment.

Frankly, I HATE IT when idiots say things like that, "Face your fears" and "Get over it". I almost always find out my fears were warranted!

I must have missed that connotation. Forgive me for being insensitive. However, I didn't conclude that that teacher was trying to be supportive, since he acted like a jerk after getting her to present her paper.

AnnabelLee,
as are diagnosed,do the the teachers know that have aspergers/anything else?

there should be accomodations in place to avoid this,but there arent.
get parents involved,get them complaining,really,the school staff [at least the teacher spoke about on this thread] needs more training [or any at all] in aspergers and about self in general,autism spectrum disorders are very complex and cannot be understood by reading the dsm,the teacher sounds mostly ignorant than being more of a git so once he gets educated on self and on aspergers, he should be more aware and understanding.
at the very least,the teachers need some good books or websites with information about aspergers.
ignorance was always a major problem to autism as well as aspergers, dyslexia adhd etc,when am was at school,am was held down by teachers and stared into the eyes in an attempt to get am to speak,hit with wooden rulers,roughly restrained and called evil amongst other things.
think of it this way,with each year,ignorance does improve,as more awareness becomes available,plus they would be sued by everyone if they didn't improve.


what if were to ask the teacher to look at this thread so he could see exactly what think about what goes on and what others say?

The teacher probably thought if you get some positive feedback from the paper it'd help your confidence. It came across wrong, but his intentions were good, not malicious.

As for his comments on the paper, it's constuctive critisism. Don't take it too personally, it's just his job to do that. Remind him, though, that a song is subject to different points of view. Everyone is entitled to hear a song the way they want to, and interpret it as they will. Depressing, or cheerful, it doesn't matter.

First, my mother is of no use here. I am a married woman in a collegiate setting. I have children of my own!
My paper was very well prepared. He NEVER told us anyone would have to read it out loud. To be honest, had he, I would have brought something from special populations stating that this causes severe anxiety attacks. What some need to realize is that I only recently began to get treatment, though I was diagnosed almost 10 years ago. I am working on problems like being able to leave the house and make phone calls!
My counselor and my husband thinks it's amazing I've been able to attend college at all right now, much less succeed.
This teacher has a history of being a know it all. He decided he knows everything about autism and that he can "cure" all my social issues and phobias by forcing me, repeatedly, to face them. Last time, I ended up having to be in my room for hours just trying to slow my heart rate.
I do not tell people I am not disabled. I am disabled, but I am also just barely above high functioning autism. I had one say I was and one say asperger's and they decided to use the label asperger's for "my sake". I do not get help for being disabled, but how can one say they are not disabled when being in public is a terrifying thing, when they cannot remember simple things like paying the bills because they're mind is focusing on figuring something out that seems far more important. Maybe disabled is the incorrect term...I am "differently abled". Though I am lacking socially and have severe sensory issues, I have a high intelligence and musical gifting that most do not have.
For the record, if he'd allowed me what all my other professors have allowed, which is presenting my paper from my seat, with my back to the class, I would have been just fine. It is standing up there, knowing they are wondering about why I do that "thing" with my hands, or why I'm making those faces. It is horrible to have to do this. Had I known, I may have prepared myself as usual, which consists of first presenting it to just my husband, then my husband and kids, then all the prior people plus my mom and his mom. I build up to it this way because I figure if I can impress my mother-in-law, I'm in good shape!
What can I do considering I'm in college? I am not "entitled" to college; it is a privilege.
As for the topic of my paper, I chose the song "If I Close My Eyes Forever". I wrote about it touching on my worst fear, that when I close my eyes forever, my life will have been for naught because I will have changed nothing, made no difference in the life of anyone. That is my worst fear. Call it depressing to consider what makes a life having meaning, but I don't think anything wrong with it. He said the very day prior it was very well written then decided suddenly to make me an example to the classroom. He only started picking on it because the reaction of several of the "popular" students was griping about the depressive nature of the paper. He is always trying to look "cool" to the students. He is NOT a good professor. However, I have to take this class. It fills a humanities requirement.

I think this teacher is a jerk.
Even if he knows nothing about AS, he shouldn't treat anyone that way.
This is who bullies become when they grow up.

He should be suspended...
preferably by his thumbs, from the ceiling.