How did you play with other children when you were little?

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I've read often times now that Aspie children tend to be bossy and dominating when playing with others and cannot accept any compromises (as far as I understood it). Is that true for all? Or could the quality of problems with interacting also manifest themselves in another kind of way? What is with the reverse kind for example, i.e. when a child is too passive, undemanding and/or quiet?
Personally I wasn't bossy when playing with other children as far as I remember. I mean, I often had firm suggestions on what to play or how to play it and wasn't too happy with compromises I suppose, but I could accept them.

Last edited by risingphoenix on 21 Oct 2007, 8:46 am, edited 1 time in total.

I didn't.

Not even with brothers and sisters (if you have any)?

I've always been a planner, I tended to be bossy. My OCD didn't help. By others reactions I caught myself & learned to tone it down... at least I think I learned to tone it down.

I certainly wasn't bossy! NO WAY! I wish I were! In fact, I was one that was always willing to go on the teeter totter, or push the merry go round! Still, I was kind of an outcast. Not because of looks, bad attitude, or even bad behaviour. It was basically just because I couldn't fit in. That quickly evolved into not even wanting to fit in. BTW it appears that most people here are like I am in this regard.

I found it quite difficult 2 fit in wid other children in my younger days cos i was quiet n was quite shy as i had very little speech den n went i did try 2 fit in i always would b bullied so therefore i was den a loner.

People played with me.

They were just there to me.

My mother said I played normally with other children when I was little. As I grew up, I became more bookish and tended to retreat to my room to read.

I was the quiet type, never had an outburst in my life, but always had 'inbursts' when overwhelmed.

my sister was the bossy one and I had so much resentment for her because she got all the attention.

I understand better now and that weather we are the noisey type or quiet type we are all worthy of the good things in life. However, I find I can only form friendships at depth with people who are quiet and sensitive as opposed to people who are loud and insensitive.

I was never bossy or demanding as child either. I have too big of a heart to do the opposite.
However, i have come of demanding towards my sister when she wouldn't give me back my stuff!

Danielismyname,
wonder if it's because are AD rather than AS? would that be another difference?

am felt no concept of other people as a child,and didn't interact with them,did seem to become aware of animals instantly though.
useless with compromises now,think it's because they are always asked for after everything had already been arranged and planned,more of a change thing than control with am.

children used to come and play with me because their parents told them to.
I used to make them line up according to age and march around - I was really surprised when one day they said they didn't like it.

I didn't play with other children.

But at one time, I did. I tried that is. I tried playing with one girl who was there without my consent, since she was the daughter of our neighbours and my granny had to look after her quite often. I made her do what I said, she wasn't allowed to disagree with me. I didn't realise she was human and had her own ideas and wants, just like me, so I played with her the same way I played with my toy cars and toy animals!

I never truley "played" with other children until I was 16 at which point I didn't play anymore of course. My social interactions improved greatly when I was about 11/12 years old, when I realised these other annoying talking and walking things were a lot like me, but I couldn't figure out what to make of their wishes, when I disagreed with them.

When I was a child, most of my relationships with other children stemmed from either fights or arguments. I could never develop relationships irl without some kind of confrontation. It's bizzare. As an adult, I'm much less inclined toward conflict, so I find myself a little lonely. Oh, well. Friends are vermin, anyway. All they ever do is ask you for things.

I was bossy when I played with my friends. I wanted them to do everything I say and play my way, I was hardly flexible. I remember I get mad at them whenever they broke something by accident and I had to work on not getting mad and learn they don't break my stuff on purpose, it's an accident. When I be at their houses, it be hard for me to play with them because they would be doing what they were doing with their other friends and I wanted to do something else, play with their stuff acting like I'm in their own house so I just sit there with them being bored hoping we go in their house and play or do something else. They tell me "Then go home" if I said I was bored.
I was also told to go home a lot when I be at their house. But if I was at someone's house because my mother brought me and my brothers over for their mother to watch, I did whatever I wanted. I played with anything I wanted acting like it was my own stuff. Then I started to play with younger kids when I was 10 and found it much easier because they did what I did. We played with dolls and other toys, watched videos kids my age would never do. They wanted to do boring stuff instead, instead of playing.

But I learned to play flexible when I was 12 because I was tyring to be unselfish and caring so I let my brothers play their games first they rent or movies, let my friend with Down syndrome pick what movie she wanted to watch, and pick an activity to do.

Then when I was in my teens, I played with a 11 year old girl when I was 13 and 14. She came over a lot and we play together and when I was 14 we hang out at school and then she moved. She was the only friend I had close to my age in a while. Then I was by myself again. I have tried having friends my own age but we all had nothing in common. They weren't into Barbie dolls anymore or toys. But there were 7th graders that talked to me when I was 14 and they told me to bring my Barbies to school so we can play with them but my mother told me they were just saying that thinking I wouldn't really do it but I had the guts and she told me to keep them home or kids could make fun of me about it. When I was 17 and 18 I played with a boy who was 7 yrs younger than me. We played videogames together. I played with his older sister for a bit when she was my age but she got herself arrested when she got in a fight with her mother and she ended up living with her father so she wasn't around to play with anymore.

I played with some of the children back when I was quite young. I don't know about being "bossy", but there were particular roles I wanted to play. This never used to be a problem. However, I often preferred to play with Legoes and not play with other kids. I also used to play with a friend, but because she was bossy, I don't think I could call myself bossy. However, I highly doubt she has AS.