Banks

Post Reply New Topic

I had to cash three cheques in yesterday. I had to ask my Mum exactly what to say and she had to write down "key words" for me. I cannot use banks at all. Whenever I go into one, I freeze up in front of the cashier, and I have to concentrate on every action and word. I don't understand banks, and I had to ask my Mum to organise a bank account for me, because I don't know how to do it.
"How to use Banks for Idiots" would be good for me.

I'm not quite that bad normally, but I do wish I had a How to use <topic> for idiots for a lot of things. I want to know exactly what I'm supposed to do/say.

And while I'm normally fine, sometimes (probably stress related) I'm just not able to do stuff I can normally do. Like yesterday I got my mom to set up a car appointment to have my car looked at. I called the place, got transfered to service, and then hung up. NORMALLY I can go through with that conversation, but I don't know, I'm having a little trouble the last couple of days.

Use the automatic pay-in machines for things like cheques. And bank online for your day-to-day needs. That will eliminate the need to interact socially with bank staff and should make your life a lot easier.

Yeah, good idea. I use an ATM for everything I can (and my work checks are direct deposited to the bank).

I always found banks in the UK pretty easy - tellers are usually helpful, so even if you screw up what you're asking for, they'll usually be patient in helping figure out what you want. Much of banking is about filling out forms with complicated, anachronistic terms. They're used to people not really understanding what they need, and will normally help you through. The hard part is realising they'll be helpful, and not worrying about messing up what you're asking for so you can let them do the hard work. FWIW, I bank with the Royal Bank of Scotland in the UK, and Bank of America in the US, who I've found to be a little less helpful, but still pretty good. RBS's internet banking is really, really good, and I'm quite able to manage my UK accounds online now I live overseas. US ATMs are far better than UK ones, and able to perform more functions, but the internet banking seems less sophisticated.

Have you considered adding your mum or other family member to your accounts as a cosigner, so she can do some of the banking tasks you need completed for you?

I wonder if I should be teaching my son to use his bank account. I do his banking for him. He feels uncomfortable ordering from a menu. If restaurants are so hard for him, why put him through other societal exercises? He's so extra good at what he's good at. Math and science, along with some very good temperamental control. I worry about his life without someone who will do the stuff that freaks him out but it's a jungle out there.

Maybe talk to him about it, and have him try every now and again? It's definitely good for everyone know about this sort of thing.

Aw man... I suppose I shouldn't feel awkward, but I'm so like that too. My mom does my banking for me, because I have no clue where to start to get money. Or pay it in. I'd have to go the front and ask the employees that then tell me - because I look young and healthy and very able to do such a mundane task - to use the stupid machines. They are helpful, I have no doubt in that, but they are a lot more helpful to my grandmother than to me, because she is old and confused and I'm not.

When I went to get these thingies which say how much money you have on your account, my mom too had to explain everything to me in detail. I missed the machine nonetheless and had to stand next to a table and pretend that I looked at the flyers in order to scan the area for that machine. It was distressing, but I eventually found it, put my card it, made sure I wouldn't forget to take it home with me again and then fled the bank as slow as I figured that nobody would think I just robbed it.

I know that I will have to make my mom teach me sometime soon, I want to be independent. I just won't ask her tomorrow or the day after or the day after that... but, I'll ask her some time.

Banking is just one thing he needs to know about. There is so much. He's so good at computer programming and sciences that I'm just hoping he'll use those smarts to make a million dollars and then he can hire a personal assistant to do the banking and ordering from restaurant menus for him.

Who do you bank with? I was badmouthing the online banking I use above, but it's still OK. How much would he have to do at the branch? I don't think I've stepped into a bank in over a year, and I rarely even need to go to the ATM (then again, I never have cash on me, which is awkward occasionally, but still not all that often). It's surprising how little you need to do in person nowadays. Heck, you can even open accounts, get credit cards, apply for loans and mortgages online. There's virtually nothing that requires any in-person interaction nowadays, assuming you're with one of the larger banking institutions.

He thinks online banking looks interesting and it doesnt upset him but just making a deposit to a real person would make him nervous. Now that I think about it, he could avoid all humans and just stick with ATM's. You're right. There are good alternatives.

I can use banks just fine. But I don't like to.

That to me seems like the #1 reason to start teaching him to use his bank account. I mean, maybe just a few minutes a week. The fact that something freaks him out is a reason to start getting accustomed to it a bit at a time starting right now, not a reason to avoid it. He doesn't need to love it, but he needs to be able to tolerate it: get in, do what he needs to do, and get out while causing the least possible amount of stress to himself and other people (because the last thing you want is for his behavior to freak out the teller enough that she thinks he's a bank robber).

And even if he becomes a computer programmer and makes a million dollars and finds a personal assistant to do that all for him ... that's probably still several years (at best) in the future. What is he going to do until then?

Yeah, there's so much I need to teach him. I'm probably overprotective. When I see him struggling to make his needs or wants known, I often jump in and "rescue" him. I NEED to train myself to let him stumble and get up again by himself. It's hard. He's the sweetest guy in the world,

Im alrite wid banks but mostly i use ATMs as i only check me balance as im always in a rush.

Thanks, that's really helpful.