Afraid to get a job

Post Reply New Topic

I was fired from my job this past January for something I later found out was one of my psychological problems (AS makes me easily frustrated, and I often revert to rather childish behavior when under stress) and am now really frightened about getting back into the job market. I had a couple of jobs in between, but was fired from those too. One I was fired from for talking too much to customers and the other for a mixup (that wasn't my fault) with the schedule. I pretty much have to get a job now because we can't live paycheck to paycheck on my husband's salary anymore and I've really improved my mental condition. Can anyone give me some advice or a swift kick to the behind to tell me it'll be alright? Early on, I applied for dozens of jobs but didn't even get interviews. *sigh*

I'd say that you should go for it. I'm looking to get a job myself soon enough. I want to work.

Without the stress of a difficult job and harsh coworkers/management/public it is easier to get things under control. However, my situation is similar to yours, so I can't really offer too much good advice. I would suggest, as I am trying to do the same, searching for a job where you don't have to work with the public (or with food), maybe one that you are making things or just whatever suits you - find the job for you, don't just settle for you being for the job.

Money may be important, but being a slave to circumstances for it is wrong. Happy job hunting and merry Christmas!

If you do your job well and am a very good worker, I don't see why they should fire you over a few mistakes you make. No one is perfect.

I would just go and apply for a job. I would look on craigslist for your area and look in the Sunday paper at the jobs and see who is hiring. I don't know if you have finished high school or not but I would apply at places that don't say anything about must have high school diploma if you never graduated.

When I apply for jobs, I apply at places where college education isn't required because I never went to college for a degree and every time I see a job that says experience required and I never had experience in it, I don't apply but if they don't anything about having to have experience, I apply.

I would just go out and look. Every time I'm out of the house and I see a store is hiring or a restaurant, I would put that in mind and go apply there. I would even use the newspaper too and craigslist. That's what I did when I was looking for a job back in March and it only took me three weeks to get one but I applied for jobs five days a week and looked for a job online everyday and write the address down and go there the next day.

It would help if you told us the type of job you want.

OK, [obscene modesty and reverse arrogance mode on] the corporate structure has gained a new way to hire in big companies. There are some geniuses(sarc) in HR(aka "Human Resources") that want to simplify(sarc) the process. They want you to be "precise"* in your wording. They also write requirements that must be "followed"**. Anyway, MANY know how intelligent they are, and you must honor the fact that they are gatekeepers***.[obscene modesty and reverse arrogance mode off]

Sorry for the overly flowery language, but this IS a pet peave of mine. Here is a translation key:

* Treat them like they are chimpanzees, and break down tasks in every relevant way possible. Try not to sound stupid, arrogant, or patronizing, but list it out. In the job I have now, I was THE best candidate(they openly even told me so within a year of my being hired), and I was almost rejected. WHY???? Because I didn't break things down to a very simple level, and I was HONEST.(I NEVER lied, but it goes to show you what you are up against. Everyone else DID lie!) ALSO, the title/goals should match the thing they are looking for.

** Even some "REQUIRED" items can be skipped or, better yet, implied. DON'T lie though. It isn't right, and can haunt you forever. They use CANNED info, and may not know ANYTHING about the position, so the requirements may even be COUNTER to the job anyway.

*** If you know anyone there, or have any kind of in, USE IT! There may be thousands looking for one job YOU want.

I did graduate high school, and I'm actually college educated. Unfortunately, I chose a major with no application to the real world outside of a couple of cities. I majored in Film Studies. I'm basically qualified for retail where I live, but that's exactly what I'm trying NOT to go for. Thanks for the responses, and I luckily have a friend who will help me with this too.

ETA: Ideally, I would like a clerical job. I'm a very fast typer and like office-type work. I want something SO simple -- 9-5 M-F office job -- and I can't seem to make it happen.

If you're serious about the typing/office stuff, start out with a temp agency. They'll get you in a few places, and if you're good, it could lead to one of the offices keeping you on full-time.

I like the temp agency suggestion. Temp agencies used to be my fallback, when I could not find or keep a full time position. I think temporary jobs are great for the reason that it forced me diversify my interests, and I was never anywhere long enough for other people to recognize my symptomatic behavior. However, about 5 years ago I was offered a position that was ideal, (minimal supervision, decision making power) etc. etc. I moved half way across the country, as I thought I had finally found my niche. As the job evolved I was put into more and more situations that I would describe as managerial or very dependent on the input and cooperation of others. So, last year I was fired, as a result of my interaction with others. 4 years with one employer is a new record for me. I will go back to the temp agencies once again, when I build up the courage, and I will never give up trying to work with the other humans. I hope you can get back in the workforce.

I've had similar employment issues, and I agree with you. I once quit a job in embarrassment after getting tortured for my AS tendencies. After I told the manager of my difficulties, he told everyone in his department to stop talking to me! Yea, I really fit in after that. I then worked short temp jobs to prevent people from discovering my AS. I would have a six month limit, as that is when people would figure out there's something "different" about me. (I was discovered after only 3 in the aforementioned torture job due to the actions of some NT jerk/bully.) Find a small, local agency. Avoid the big national agencies, as they are notorious liars willing to dupe people into jobs they don't want for the sake of their corporate clients and their own commission. (Ajilon is the worst! Totally evil!)

I found a recruiter willing to work with me, and told her I would only work short assignments. I used my knowledge of Excel as leverage to find a suitable job. I also scored very high on the data entry test. If you're like me and just want a simple, brainless job to get some cash, data entry is not bad for aspies. (The pay sucks though.) I would work one or two months, improve my job skills, gain some confidence, get into the office routine, then move on. Working short-term is a good way to overcome your fear.

Do you know Microsoft office or any of the programs really well? Go over the program and get ready for the agency test. I loved the time off and not having to deal with difficult co-workers for extended periods of time, which is what temp work offered, but I was always low on cash. I now have a permanent job, but everyday I wonder if the bad hours and people I need to deal with makes it worthwhile. Good luck.