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Is this behavior aspiness?

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Greentea
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10 Dec 2007, 2:42 pm

I was at a small gathering at a friend's last night, and we all sat in a circle. This guy on my right, whom I'd never seen before, kept turning to my side and staring me in the eye while someone else was talking and I was listening to them. It felt very awkward. Or he'd start telling me some terribly boring anecdote while everyone else (and me) was listening to someone telling something interesting or to 2 people interacting.

He got on my nerves. But then I felt bad, because what if this is an aspie just like me?


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Zarathustra
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10 Dec 2007, 3:37 pm

Does sound 100% Aspie...


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Greentea
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10 Dec 2007, 3:44 pm

But all that eye contact...?


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mmaestro
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10 Dec 2007, 3:59 pm

Greentea wrote:
But all that eye contact...?

Could be overcompensation - he knows he ought to do it, so he does, and does it too much if anything. Don't know if the guy's aspie. But then, you can never know for sure without asking. It's certainly possible, from your description.


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Kurtz
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10 Dec 2007, 4:11 pm

Greentea wrote:
I was at a small gathering at a friend's last night, and we all sat in a circle. This guy on my right, whom I'd never seen before, kept turning to my side and staring me in the eye while someone else was talking and I was listening to them. It felt very awkward. Or he'd start telling me some terribly boring anecdote while everyone else (and me) was listening to someone telling something interesting or to 2 people interacting.

He got on my nerves. But then I felt bad, because what if this is an aspie just like me?


I think he liked you.


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aeroz
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10 Dec 2007, 4:16 pm

I dont know about aspie, but I wouldn't call him NT



serenity
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10 Dec 2007, 4:35 pm

Kurtz wrote:
Greentea wrote:
I was at a small gathering at a friend's last night, and we all sat in a circle. This guy on my right, whom I'd never seen before, kept turning to my side and staring me in the eye while someone else was talking and I was listening to them. It felt very awkward. Or he'd start telling me some terribly boring anecdote while everyone else (and me) was listening to someone telling something interesting or to 2 people interacting.

He got on my nerves. But then I felt bad, because what if this is an aspie just like me?


I think he liked you.


That's what I think, too. My guess is that he's AS, or has really bad social skills. He was probably trying to engage you with eye contact, but in reality was staring you down. lol I used to know a guy that behaved that way in highschool. I suspect that this guy had AS, given what I know now.



LeKiwi
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10 Dec 2007, 5:21 pm

There was a guy I went to school with who I swear is an aspie (never asked, but I'm 100% convinced of it). He used to sit across from me in one of my classes and stare at me constantly... like unblinking, unstopping stare. It creeped me out, but everyone would laugh and say he liked me. I didn't like that idea so ignored it so it would go away.


Then he sent me a 4 page letter confessing his undying love.


;)




Nice guy though, we're still mates!!



pluto
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10 Dec 2007, 5:43 pm

It could be an aspect of Aspieness (how's that for alliteration ) to do with a
lack of self awareness and/or social skills.Maybe he's not aware that others can
detect him staring or he doesn't realise it can be construed as bad manners.
I often have to remind myself not to habitually stare at people in places such as
crowded trains.

Of course it could just be that he likes you :)


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aeroz
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10 Dec 2007, 5:47 pm

I used to stare at people without even realizing it. I wasn't technically staring at THEM, they just happened to be in the direction I was looking in. Sometimes I even zone out and am completely unaware of what I'm even looking at until someone snaps me back. I believe its a type of self-hypnosis



LeKiwi
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10 Dec 2007, 5:49 pm

I do that, I totally zone, my eyes go all funny... the kind focus on the middle-distance and I drift off and don't reeeeally think of anything, I just go blank. Apparently it looks like I'm staring at something, but I'm not. 'Lights on but nobody home' as they say!! ;)