How does one live a civil life? Any tips?

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Am I going to contribute to someone's depression by not mowing my lawn and making their street look a little uglier? Am I going to contribute to someone's depression by writing a sad book? Am I going to contribute to someone's depression by disagreeing with them on a point? Am I contributing to someone's depression by not replying to something they say because I don't know what to say? Can someone help me?

I am a 25 year old homeowner, I work every day and drive 400 miles a week. Never before have I had such a stable (civil) life. I do this by having a routine, everything has order, everyday is predictable. I know what I must do, I have realistic short and long term goals, great organizational skills and want to blend into society, I want to be respected rather then in my younger years rebelling against it.

I find it easier to conform to society then to work against it, I want the American dream, a house (a bigger, nicer one then the one I currently live in) with a picket fence, a wife and children. That is my ultimate dream, I will sacrafice everything else that makes me happy to just have this, seems pretty ordinary, but for someone like me it can be extrodinary because women dont understand me and it seems to be the only real part of my autism I cannot rise above. If I want my wish to come true, I need to be civil as much as possible and basicly keep doing what I am doing now to plan for the future and to show any future women in my life that dispite not being able to 'cuddle' or show love like they want, I can be a very loving young man and can provide for a family.

Firstly, I love your avatar. Go MT!

Secondly, of your descriptions, I would imagine not answering someone might upset them in many situations, but other than that, I don't see how you having a messy lawn or writing a sad book will depress someone.
There are LOADS of sad books out there.
I can't read them. Or true stories. If I can just not read sad books or look at messy lawns surely everyone else can.
As for disagreeing with someone, as long as it doesn't seem personal I guess.

A civil life in my opinion is a life that doesn't do any permanent damage to any other life or any part of any other life.


It's a bit difficult sometimes.

agreed.

it depends. The lawn mowing thing (at least in the US) is a no-brainer. Anyone lives in a fairly modern development is usually a thrall to the homeowner's association, which sets rules for how the place looks. Let the grass grow, and you get fined x hundred bucks or so. Or, failing that, many municipalities will show up after a few weeks, mow your lawn anyway, and send you a bill for a hundred bucks.

What's really sad is that the only way you can contribute to someone's depression is if they have an emotional connection to you in the first place. Annoyance, aggravation, contempt, etc., are normal if you tick someone off, but that's the way it works with the 'normal' folks. You'd be surprised what a lot of neighbors don't know (or don't care about) each other.

I have noticed that a lot of 'normal' folks will leave you alone if you give off the 'I don't want to be bothered' emanations. It's not a place most would want to stay in, but it's a start. Get control of your own situation, then reach out to people one by one until you have a comfortable amount of acquaintances...which is what I'd do

frankly im sick and tired of trying to please people. what a miserable life that is, once my lease is up im never talking to my family again and will live with my little weiner dog who i was going to name ajax, but now changed it to ichiro. i will live my life amongst my sportscards and rocks and will look back on the last 27 years and forgett about it, to look forward to the rest of my life