Anger, frustration and self-harm

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My boyfriend is an aspie too. When he feels threatened or confined he wants to leave and when we argue his response is to go home. I freak out. Badly. I cry my eyes out, I try to physically stop him, I become hysterical. It happened yesterday and I locked myself in the bathroom, banged my head against the door a few times and then scatched my own arm, which has left bruises as well as scratches. I was so angry and frustrated, that's how I always feel when hurt. I have a big history with self-harm but stopped 2 years ago. I'm pretty upset it's rearing its ugly head again.

Can anyone relate and do you think this has to do with asperger's?

When I'm anxious I chew my nails to peices. I once bit too hard and ripped out a section of a nail. It wasn't pretty. I'm sure this has nothing to do with you bruising your arms, but I do understand the intense anger and frustration that motives one to do such things. It seems like a side affect of emotional issues that AS is tied to. A way to vent?

I have issues with self harm too. It wasn't long ago that I brought it up to my therapist so we're still working on things to help "manage emotions" like meditation, etc. I understand though, if I get worked up about something and my anxiety level is up I cut myself with razor blades. I know other people would be so grossed out, but I feel like it's my way to release my sadness and frustration. I think part of it too is self loathing because I don't feel normal and wish I could handle my life better.

yes i'm very self injurious, headbanging is a serious issue especially with me, ive knocked myself out, given myself huge bumps, bled, opened my head open before, my head is deformed due to it all, and my arms have scars including my hands are deformed from biting and scratching them open, any type of self injurious behavior i prob have done or do lol, sadly. and i know where ur coming from on relatioships, i cannot know how anybody handles these, how they make it work, it jus boggles me. either way hope things are ok wit u now and u have no serious damage. ive caused a lot of damage to my head, im losing my sight, hearing, more dizzy, and now have siezures regularly. and i hope u and ur partner fix everything, dont give up!

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Being Normal Is Vastly Overrated

Nettiesspagetti, I really relate to this statement: "I think part of it too is self loathing because I don't feel normal and wish I could handle my life better." My emotional reactions are ten times what they should be and it makes me feel like I'm a freak. I know that normality is subjective and everybody is different etc but I have always felt like my thought processes and my feelings were unique and not always in a good way. Of course, now I know about Asperger's, it all makes much more sense. But no matter how well I do - and I have achieved a lot considering my limitations - I can't get my disproportionate emotional reactions to stop. I used to do the razor blade thing, I hope you'll be careful.

Age1600, I feel bad for you, having caused so much damage. I luckily have not hurt myself so much. My arms and legs are covered in scars from cuts and burns but the head banging is rare so I haven't hurt myself in any lasting way. Reading what has happened to you, I think I'll try hard to stop myself next time. Relationships are crazy, you're right. I have been in this one for three years and left a very dependable, good looking man I'd been with for five years to be with him. He's the only person I've ever met who really gets me, because he's an aspie and thinks quite like me. If I believed in soulmates, he'd be mine. But our relationship has been this scary, tumultuous rollercoaster and has only just evened out in the last six months. He makes me crazy. I pride myself on being independent and having a lot of willpower. I stopped cutting two years ago but he can get to me in a way nothing else can.

I wish I knew how to calm down when he acts that way. I desperately want not to react the way I did this weekend.

When I get too frustrated and/or angry, I tend to meltdown, and usually punch myself in the head or bang my head on the wall. Bite myself. Punch my legs. Pull my hair. Ect. Though sometimes this happens sans meltdown.

So far I haven't done any lasting damage, though.

I occasionally self-harm when in a meltdown. I don't know yet what to do about it...I mean, I have some strategies on how to prevent meltdowns, but once one is hitting fullforce, I don't know how to stop it.