Advice please good peoples

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How do you make an NT realise that there are some things that are not to be messed with?
Things like breaking routine with no warning, and that screaming something really loud over and over while walking down the road as a way of coping is ok?
I am a little bit embarrased my some of my son's behaviour when we are out of the house. I know I shouldn't be but I am.

Depends on the NT. If it's just the average stander-by, their opinions don't really matter. You can always say something like, "It's a coping mechanism and we can't help it" (saying "we" cements for them that you're defending him), or - if you're both okay with using the term - just explain that he's autistic/whatever term you use (usually it at least shuts them up or sends them on their way) and needs a different way to deal. At some point maybe he'll even be comfortable and competent with explaining for himself, but that's very individual to the person and the situation.

OregonBecky and I have a profoundly autistic daughter. She is 23, but ever since she was perhaps 13 or 14 she would break away from us whenever she saw a baby. Especially, if the baby was crying. A typical event would go like this:

We are shopping and holding her hand and she is walking with us. We turn down an aisle and look over at some product on the shelf. But Athena looks way down the aisle and she sees a baby carriage. She breaks away from us, runs down the aisle with us following, and she quickly reaches into the baby carriage, takes the baby completely out and raises it over her head... and then hands the baby to the nearly shocked-dead mother who is nearby.

And that's when it isn't so bad because we were just a second or two behind her. She still does this, given a chance. And she is stronger than most folks. And if the baby cries where she can hear it, she is even far more ferocious, quick, and determined and won't be stopped easily even if we both get hold of her and try and restrain her. And then she will simply melt down and freak and scream at the top of her lungs if the baby still cries.

If we even imagine we hear a baby cry near her and we tackle her like football players.

She is perfectly, totally safe with babies. She is strong, sure, and can be completely relied upon to not allow any harm or to make any mistakes in moving them around. She's an eagle-eye, that way, too. But no, I don't think NT's are going to get used to her.

Jon

jonk, I know it's awful, but I'm laughing. My 30 yr daughter grabs the little fingers. If she can ease off the sock and play with the toes, all the better. Fortunately, most moms are kind as I sputter up behind saying, she likes babies and thinks yours is cute. But hoisting the baby, ay yi yi.

Agreed, and by the way, that's the best avatar ever.