Bl. & Wh. thinking and selfimage.

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I figured out that some of my problems with my selfimage may come from the infamous black and white thinking. I have difficulty define myself as either other that "smart" or "stupid", and the reality be of course a complex mix between the two, I zigzag constantly between the two.

Anyone else like this? It can also be other things, like can't deciding if a "saint" or a "monster".

Well, just a idea like that.

I think we all can be saints and monsters at times. Its called being human. If you do something bad, just take a bit of time to look at yourself, and learn from it.

Hey, I am the same! I worked this out about myself last year... I realised that I battle between 2 extremes within myself all the time and kept trying to work out WHICH extreme I actually was. What I finally decided was that I was both, and that that is ok, it didn't HAVE to be one or the other

Liz

I'm glad you have a dark side

This was a significant part of the reason I was in such huge denial about being autistic for so long. I had to get over my own BS to deal with it.

That and I'd lose it whenever someone pointed out a crack in my facade.

There is a user name here of Gift or Curse. It certainly works 'both ways' for me- it depends I guess of when the right conditions/ circumstances exacerbate "it." It seems to be compartmentalized because you can quickly move between these states with no (emotive)cognitive link between between the two -one state disintegrates the other to a mere shadow of a distant memory.

I don't fully understand the mechanisms involved, other than a conjecture that our thoughts (with that trailing emotion) seem to have quite an inertial force, and this seems to exaggerate "this", as there is that inherent narrow focus excluding perhaps a wider contextual view .

Oh, it's there alright lol

Liz

One of my major problems is being flexable, and spending money on whatever it is everyone else in my town buys. Shure i'm still on my canned food diet because i'm saving my money wich, nobody seems to understand but me.

Does this involve cookies?

Black and white thinking is a Borderline feature I believe. I struggle with this as well. Before I was medicated it was much harder to control and I would constantly get stuck in a mental rut. For instance, if I made a bad score on a quiz or test, I was a horrible student...and person...who had no chance of ever making it later in life. Black and white thinking can be a very crippling habit if you can't learn to get a handle on it.

That's me. Even after a year or two of knowing about binary thinking and the need to look at the grey area, the idea that I could be somewhere in the middle just doesn't feel right.

It's similar for competence too. I'm either a wizard or a a dullard. I know logically that I'm somewhere between the two, but I can't feel that I am.

Yep. I thought I was unintelligent for the first 25 or so years of my life, because I was in some classes for people with learning disabilities. A few years ago, I found out I'm also gifted in some areas. So I'm gifted and LD... just wish I knew more than the LD part before my mid twenties. :-/

Cookies?

Same for me. I'm still having a hard time accepting that I have any sort of disability, because even though I definitely have problems, I am still able to function on some level. I am trying to convince myself that it isn't all or nothing, but knowing it and believing it seem to be 2 different things.