Page 1 of 1 [ 15 posts ] 

Tollorin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jun 2009
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,178
Location: Sherbrooke, Québec, Canada

07 Feb 2011, 6:41 pm

I figured out that some of my problems with my selfimage may come from the infamous black and white thinking. I have difficulty define myself as either other that "smart" or "stupid", and the reality be of course a complex mix between the two, I zigzag constantly between the two.

Anyone else like this? It can also be other things, like can't deciding if a "saint" or a "monster".

Well, just a idea like that.


_________________
Down with speculators!! !


murphycop
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jan 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,134

07 Feb 2011, 6:55 pm

I think we all can be saints and monsters at times. Its called being human. If you do something bad, just take a bit of time to look at yourself, and learn from it.


_________________
'Ave we had a national f**king stroke!??


analyser23
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 446

07 Feb 2011, 7:56 pm

Hey, I am the same! I worked this out about myself last year... I realised that I battle between 2 extremes within myself all the time and kept trying to work out WHICH extreme I actually was. What I finally decided was that I was both, and that that is ok, it didn't HAVE to be one or the other :)

Liz



murphycop
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jan 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,134

07 Feb 2011, 8:18 pm

analyser23 wrote:
Hey, I am the same! I worked this out about myself last year... I realised that I battle between 2 extremes within myself all the time and kept trying to work out WHICH extreme I actually was. What I finally decided was that I was both, and that that is ok, it didn't HAVE to be one or the other :)

Liz


I'm glad you have a dark side ;)


_________________
'Ave we had a national f**king stroke!??


Verdandi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,275
Location: University of California Sunnydale (fictional location - Real location Olympia, WA)

07 Feb 2011, 9:09 pm

Tollorin wrote:
I figured out that some of my problems with my selfimage may come from the infamous black and white thinking. I have difficulty define myself as either other that "smart" or "stupid", and the reality be of course a complex mix between the two, I zigzag constantly between the two.

Anyone else like this? It can also be other things, like can't deciding if a "saint" or a "monster".

Well, just a idea like that.


This was a significant part of the reason I was in such huge denial about being autistic for so long. I had to get over my own BS to deal with it.

That and I'd lose it whenever someone pointed out a crack in my facade.



Mdyar
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 May 2009
Age: 59
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,516

07 Feb 2011, 10:18 pm

Tollorin wrote:
I figured out that some of my problems with my selfimage may come from the infamous black and white thinking. I have difficulty define myself as either other that "smart" or "stupid", and the reality be of course a complex mix between the two, I zigzag constantly between the two.

Anyone else like this? It can also be other things, like can't deciding if a "saint" or a "monster".

Well, just a idea like that.

There is a user name here of Gift or Curse. It certainly works 'both ways' for me- it depends I guess of when the right conditions/ circumstances exacerbate "it." It seems to be compartmentalized because you can quickly move between these states with no (emotive)cognitive link between between the two -one state disintegrates the other to a mere shadow of a distant memory.

I don't fully understand the mechanisms involved, other than a conjecture that our thoughts (with that trailing emotion) seem to have quite an inertial force, and this seems to exaggerate "this", as there is that inherent narrow focus excluding perhaps a wider contextual view .



analyser23
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 20 Jan 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 446

08 Feb 2011, 2:22 am

murphycop wrote:
analyser23 wrote:
Hey, I am the same! I worked this out about myself last year... I realised that I battle between 2 extremes within myself all the time and kept trying to work out WHICH extreme I actually was. What I finally decided was that I was both, and that that is ok, it didn't HAVE to be one or the other :)

Liz


I'm glad you have a dark side ;)


Oh, it's there alright ;) lol

Liz


_________________
"Reality is an illusion of the construct of our brains"
"They cannot take away our Self Respect if we do not give it to them" - Gandhi
http://www.facebook.com/TheAspieCoach (Life Coaching for Aspies)


richardbenson
Xfractor Card #351
Xfractor Card #351

User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,553
Location: Leave only a footprint behind

08 Feb 2011, 11:17 am

One of my major problems is being flexable, and spending money on whatever it is everyone else in my town buys. Shure i'm still on my canned food diet because i'm saving my money wich, nobody seems to understand but me.


_________________
Winds of clarity. a universal understanding come and go, I've seen though the Darkness to understand the bounty of Light


wavefreak58
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Sep 2010
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,419
Location: Western New York

08 Feb 2011, 12:44 pm

murphycop wrote:
analyser23 wrote:
Hey, I am the same! I worked this out about myself last year... I realised that I battle between 2 extremes within myself all the time and kept trying to work out WHICH extreme I actually was. What I finally decided was that I was both, and that that is ok, it didn't HAVE to be one or the other :)

Liz


I'm glad you have a dark side ;)


Does this involve cookies?


_________________
When God made me He didn't use a mold. I'm FREEHAND baby!
The road to my hell is paved with your good intentions.


Andie09
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 23 Oct 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 142

08 Feb 2011, 9:52 pm

Black and white thinking is a Borderline feature I believe. I struggle with this as well. Before I was medicated it was much harder to control and I would constantly get stuck in a mental rut. For instance, if I made a bad score on a quiz or test, I was a horrible student...and person...who had no chance of ever making it later in life. Black and white thinking can be a very crippling habit if you can't learn to get a handle on it.



ToughDiamond
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2008
Age: 72
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,973

09 Feb 2011, 11:49 am

Tollorin wrote:
It can also be other things, like can't deciding if a "saint" or a "monster".

That's me. Even after a year or two of knowing about binary thinking and the need to look at the grey area, the idea that I could be somewhere in the middle just doesn't feel right.

It's similar for competence too. I'm either a wizard or a a dullard. I know logically that I'm somewhere between the two, but I can't feel that I am.



j0sh
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Nov 2008
Age: 47
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,191
Location: Tampa, Florida

09 Feb 2011, 1:07 pm

Yep. I thought I was unintelligent for the first 25 or so years of my life, because I was in some classes for people with learning disabilities. A few years ago, I found out I'm also gifted in some areas. So I'm gifted and LD... just wish I knew more than the LD part before my mid twenties. :-/



murphycop
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jan 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,134

09 Feb 2011, 1:29 pm

analyser23 wrote:
murphycop wrote:
analyser23 wrote:
Hey, I am the same! I worked this out about myself last year... I realised that I battle between 2 extremes within myself all the time and kept trying to work out WHICH extreme I actually was. What I finally decided was that I was both, and that that is ok, it didn't HAVE to be one or the other :)

Liz


I'm glad you have a dark side ;)


Oh, it's there alright ;) lol

Liz


:twisted:


_________________
'Ave we had a national f**king stroke!??


murphycop
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Jan 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,134

09 Feb 2011, 1:29 pm

wavefreak58 wrote:
murphycop wrote:
analyser23 wrote:
Hey, I am the same! I worked this out about myself last year... I realised that I battle between 2 extremes within myself all the time and kept trying to work out WHICH extreme I actually was. What I finally decided was that I was both, and that that is ok, it didn't HAVE to be one or the other :)

Liz


I'm glad you have a dark side ;)


Does this involve cookies?


Cookies? :P


_________________
'Ave we had a national f**king stroke!??


Zen
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Nov 2010
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,868

09 Feb 2011, 6:02 pm

Verdandi wrote:
This was a significant part of the reason I was in such huge denial about being autistic for so long. I had to get over my own BS to deal with it.

That and I'd lose it whenever someone pointed out a crack in my facade.

Same for me. I'm still having a hard time accepting that I have any sort of disability, because even though I definitely have problems, I am still able to function on some level. I am trying to convince myself that it isn't all or nothing, but knowing it and believing it seem to be 2 different things. :-)