Rules: Love Them Or Hate Them?

Post Reply New Topic

Many descriptions of AS claim that we love structure and routine. This might indicate that we like rules, laws, guidelines, etc. and that we enjoy following them.

On the other hand, we are said to be indifferent to the expectations of society, which could mean that we don't care about socially-imposed laws and would rather live by our own rules or lack thereof.

On this board, I notice a wide variety of attitudes towards rules. I wonder if aspies are more likely to have strong opinions about rules, either for or against, than NTs. So, if you were to generalize . . . .

How do you feel about rules? Do you like having a lot of structure? Do you like to make rules? Or follow rules? Or break them?

I follow them but some I break some because they are very minor like crossing the street at night and there aren't many cars so why wait till the red light.

It doesn't bother me when people break them because I figure it's their problem and if they want to be stupid, they can go right ahead. Just because they break them doesn't mean it's okay to break those rules. That's something I finally figured out when I was 17.

I get a giddy thrill out of breaking rules I see no value in, and that includes most laws. I make it a rule to break a law at least once a day. (Hmm, is that conflicted of me or what?)

My trouble is not with rules or laws per se, it is with the humans who make and abuse them; I do not trust other humans to make and impose rules on me; it is all about control to me, and I cannot stand the notion of being controlled, cannot stand it to a fault.

I'll make my own rules and also break them when I see fit, thank you very much.

I do not see structure and routine being the same as rules. I do need structure and routine, will flip out if something interferes with them when I need them.

Yes, this fairly well describes me:

My son really likes rules and he gets annoyed when other people breaks a rule.
Me, I don't mind them. Some rules I think are stupid, others I think are very sensible.

Love 'em and hate 'em.

well, it depends on the rules, i guess.

also, in the aspie description, i dont think "rules" means any random set of rules but rather a stringent, systematic aspect. that is something i can absolutely relate to... ordering my bookshelf in a way that makes sense, eating jelly beans or gummi bears in color-coded sequences... all these things. that seems like mental aesthetics to me, similar to a sound syllogism.

rules as in random, pointless rules: meh... most often, they are so annoying. i see how adhering to some social rules could make life and interaction easier, but then id need to lie about myself and my intentions, avoiding of which is higher on my priority list. i hate these pointless things, like speed limits when you are alone on the street and know what you're doing. laws that leave foxholes for this and that, but not in this way, only if you declare it something else. laws that are made as an answer to a public uproar, that are just fighting symptoms instead of doing anything to the problem. on the other hand, i like when laws are made towards a core purpose - because it has that logic stringency to it, again.

Is this the confession booth? I'm not Catholic but I can pretend. I know rules have meaning behind them, in theory, and this why they matter. Oftentimes rules can be arbitrary or just accepted as convention. I am well-mannered, but with a mischevious streak.

Now that we're confined by the sacrament of the confession booth with drawn curtain: 1) One time, on accident, I poured Cobalt down the drain in the laboratory. I am sorry.

457 Hail Marys?
Bad Lab Pet

I hate them. I like to live life, by my own rules.

I accept that some rules, such as those that prohibit violence, are a good thing. But in general, I dislike rules. I don't like to make them, or enforce them, or follow them. I don't want to tell anyone what to do, nor do I want to be told what to do.

I like to live by my own rules, but they're actually more like guidelines - relative to the situation. Maybe "principles" would be the right word. I dream of living in a society without rules, where everyone lives by their own principles.

For me, it all depends on what the rule does

I want to know that I'm safe, won't get harassed, etc. At the same time, I can't understand rules that come off as pointless.

I demand the right to life, but want to live it freely.

I used to love rules when I was a young child. I would become upset if someone broke them...especially road rules. I would panic if my mother had a hold of the keys before I had my seat belt on in the car...and would watch the speedometer relentlessly and make sure that she was staying under the speed limit and if she went over it I would again panic.

Now...I am the opposite, I hate rules.
I think they are a barrier to discovery and adventure. They hold people back from achieving what they want and lessen the "thrill" that life provides. To do something great, to discover something new, you have to go beyond what we know..and sometimes, rules don't let you do that. With rules, you are without freedom. Without freedom, you are without a life.