Topics of conversation - 'Smalltalk' (NTs please reply)

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This is something that has bothered me all my life, and since I have begun to suspect AS in the last week, I have begun to wonder if it's just me that finds this infuriating.

'Smalltalk' - The things coworkers (and even friends!) talk about:

TV
Movies
Relationships
Sport
other 'gossip'

Now after studying conversation for years i CAN participate in such talk, but find it incredibly boring and pointless.

The questions I'm asking are:
Do NT's find this stimulating?
Is smalltalk enjoyable for them?
What do you get out of finding out someone's opinion on TV shows?
Why does what a coworker thinks about a celebrity 'matter'?

Personally, unless I'm talking about something important or relevant, I prefer to remain silent. I don't understand the NT urge to fill the silence with pointless chatter.

No. But if I'm stressed I find pointless conversation relaxing. Although I hang around nurses at work so our small talk quickly descents to indecent or black humour.



Sometimes. It depends on who I'm with.




I don't watch tv (except 'So You Think You Can Dance') so I can't answer this one.



It doesn't. But it can help you get an idea if someone is a similar type of personality to you, or whether you might get on.



That's the way NT's are wired I suppose.

Although I've been living in an Aspie household for years now. I'm the only NT. So I've become more Aspie in some ways ....less tolerance for inane chatter.

Helen

I just love talking but I do know when to stop I do like some periods of silence at times but it does get a tad boring.
So to your questions

Do NT's find this stimulating?
YES I do!

Is smalltalk enjoyable for them?
It is especially if it is just idle chitchat at time

What do you get out of finding out someone's opinion on TV shows?
I like to know what people think about something they have seen on the paritcular show, what they found funny or interesting. How they felt while watching it or what they go out of it.

Why does what a coworker thinks about a celebrity 'matter'?
[i]I don't work outside home but people have their own opinions of say Britney Spears. Some feel sorry for her and others think she is just the worst Mum/mom on the planet lol[i]

People have told me I am a born communicator

Thanks for your replies

I wish they were more 'enlightening' to me, but it seems I just don't 'get it'

as long as i know that you crazy NTs are enjoying yourselves, I'll participate in your smalltalk

Hey, look on the bright side.

Would you rather have all those people picking lice out of each other's hair?

It accomplishes the same purpose for them.

How does it do this?

My experience of small talk is that people only ask other people's opinions so they'll have an excuse to voice their own.

I don't think that the point of small talk is really to find out what someone thinks about a TV show or if they've noticed it's raining, etc. I think the point is to find a common ground. See, we're like each other, we're ok.

I can do some small talk....but i know how to make it into an interest.....

Lets say for this you're interest is the rain forest...

First talk about the weather,then talk about pollution,then talk about hat its doing to the environment, then talk about people cutting down trees and THEN talk about the rainforest with all your facts and statistics.


You just need to know what people like to talk about...then step it up a notch every couple of minutes or so.^^

Excellent questions!

In regard to the answers...I don't get it either, how people can be especially fond of meaningless communication. But to each their own... I've known many NTs who don't enjoy smalltalk either.

The main issue is that in small talk people tend to gravitate towards topics that supposedly everyone talks about (sports for guys, TV shows for women, etc.) and I find those common topics utterly dull. It seems like NT interests always conform to the majority. It's so irritating.

what about the Weather? That one can last hours. And I am quite happy with that.

Weather is the most boring subject.

I'm awful with smalltalk obviously. I pretty much only like talking about things that interest me, and you could say that I have narrow interests I guess.

Weather is boing - and yet it isnt. It can be very interesting. And poetic. Its a whole universe actually...

But what's more its a good place to hide. I'd rather talk about that than have to deal with penetrating questions about my personal life or have people rolling their eyes as I talk about something I'm interested in and they are not.

small talk is for people who hate each other, but dont want to admit it.

conversation is for people who like each other.

Interesting. I've always wondered why people place so much emphasis on others' opinions of celebrities.

I don't follow the popular celebrities at all. Co-workers often ask me what I think about them. When I say, "I don't know anything about that person," they ask me about another celebrity.

When I say, "I don't follow celebrities. I don't watch movies or TV," they look at me in a strange, disappointed and bewildered manner.

Then they say something like, "Oh, my cousin's ex-husband's brother didn't watch TV either. It must take a lot of will-power to practice such self-denial. Personally, I can't help but give in to the temptation!" And then they laugh.

And then I say, "Well, I don't experience that temptation because I don't enjoy TV or movies." Then they look at me like I'm either completely crazy or deliberately lying, and they treat me differently thereafter.

I always wondered how such an inconsequential thing could turn into such a big deal. But I guess it's because people are accustomed to using opinions of celebrities as a sort of social compass. When I don't go along with it, it's like I stole their compass.

Do I understand correctly?