Board index › General Discussion › General Autism Discussion

I have quit trying to explain my behavior to people.

Page 1 of 1 [ 9 posts ] 

Previous topic | Next topic

telrad
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 25 Mar 2008
Age: 73
Gender: Male
Posts: 21

29 Apr 2008, 9:20 am

I used to try to explain certain behaviors to people, but I have learned it is easier to just say nothing.

For example, I sit at the same cafe every day, arrange the table to my liking, then place my order. A newly hired person watched me for a couple of days, then really pressed me for a reason I moved everything around. I started explaining why the pepper and salt shakers had to be placed just so and why the napkin holder needed to be moved when I realized she was looking at me like a three cornered egg.
I think I just came off looking like a weirdo to her.
Every time I try to explain my rationalizations for my behavior, I get the same response, so I just quit trying.



Glencannon
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 22 Jan 2008
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 138
Location: Missoula, MT

29 Apr 2008, 9:34 am

Ha Ha, yeah I find that a quick, "I'm not sure, its just the way I like to do things" goes farther to explain without you looking like a weirdo.

Also, I love the use of 'three cornered egg', where did you hear that phrase?



telrad
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 25 Mar 2008
Age: 73
Gender: Male
Posts: 21

29 Apr 2008, 10:06 am

"Also, I love the use of 'three cornered egg', where did you hear that phrase?[/quote]

I have used it for most of my life--not sure if I made it up or heard it somewhere. I always thought it fit me quite nicely.



Specter
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Apr 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,206
Location: Alaska

29 Apr 2008, 11:22 am

I would have went with "I'm bored" ;)


_________________
"there is no spoon"


samantca
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 8 Apr 2008
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 438

29 Apr 2008, 11:50 am

I wouldnt have explained WHY i did it i think, i would have said that i just like it better that way or something. Ive gotten enough odd looks from my family over the years, i wouldnt want a stranger looking at me the same way.



Specter
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Apr 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,206
Location: Alaska

29 Apr 2008, 11:51 am

I get odd looks no matter what I do :D


_________________
"there is no spoon"


samantca
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 8 Apr 2008
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 438

29 Apr 2008, 12:00 pm

Specter wrote:
I get odd looks no matter what I do :D


Ive gotten a lot of them too, so i tend to try and avoid getting them whenever i can :P



Specter
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Apr 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,206
Location: Alaska

29 Apr 2008, 12:13 pm

samantca wrote:
Specter wrote:
I get odd looks no matter what I do :D


Ive gotten a lot of them too, so i tend to try and avoid getting them whenever i can :P


yup. I think people in general are overly-critical and quick to judge. I try not to let it bother me.


_________________
"there is no spoon"


lannesman
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 6 Apr 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 20
Location: Lawrenceville, Ga.

29 Apr 2008, 12:25 pm

I've told my son he doesn't have to explain everything to everyone.
Just say "I like it this way, if that's ok." I am not AS, but I am picky about what table (I prefer booths) I sit at and I do move all that unecessary junk on the table off to the side (I don't need salt, pepper, 4 different kinds of sweeteners and 2 table tents advertising the special drinks and desserts--all between me and the meal mate I am facing.).