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AV-geek
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17 Mar 2006, 12:05 am

Was looking at the owner's manual for my company van for info on how to change the headlamp bulb. I had to laugh at some of these clearly obvious things I noticed while thumbing through the manual:

"Do not pour engine coolant into the windshield washer container. If coolant is sprayed on the windshield, it could make it difficult to see through the windshieldi"

"Do not attempt to adjust pedal height while your feet are operating the pedals. Sudden, abrupt speed changes may occur and create a dangerous situation"

"Serious injury could result if power windows are closed while body parts are obstructing the glass"

"Failure to operate running lamps and headlamps after dusk will result in reduced visibality, dangerous conditions, and a risk of collision"

"Operating the sound system at excessively high levels will reduce the ability to hear emergency vehicles and other audiable warning devices outside your vehicle"

"It is important to reinstall wheel nuts before lowering jack or attempting to operate the vehicle. Failure to do so may result in vehicle damage or loss of control"



odeon
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17 Mar 2006, 3:10 am

"Click the button to change the point of view of the user." (Something I found when I worked as an editor at Ericsson.)



parts
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17 Mar 2006, 7:47 am

Quote:
"Do not pour engine coolant into the windshield washer container. If coolant is sprayed on the windshield, it could make it difficult to see through the windshieldi"

Drove my brothers car one day the windscreen was dirty and it was sunny so I hit the button guess what antifreeze does make it near impossible to see :o



I like the ones on ladders that tell you "misuse can cause injury or death"
Also on coffee cups "beverage may be hot"
Or the ones on my sleep med "may cause drowiness"



Serissa
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17 Mar 2006, 10:22 am

parts wrote:

Also on coffee cups "beverage may be hot"


That would be the rsult of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McDonald's_coffee_case

Av, very amusing. :)



parts
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17 Mar 2006, 11:11 am

Along the same lines I bought 1 15 once can of contact cleaner today and they made me take the dreded "HAZARDOUS MATERIAL BILL OF LADING" "You must keep a signed copy for a minium of 3 years" for one can I guess it all comes down to covering your butt incase of lawsuit.



aspiesmom1
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17 Mar 2006, 11:29 am

"Do not use oven door as a step, oven may tilt, leading to severe injury and possibly death"

Unfortunately, many of these came about because someone, somewhere, did them and surprise, surprise they got hurt. And blamed it on the company for not warning them not to do it.


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17 Mar 2006, 12:49 pm

On the side of a chain saw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with hand."


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17 Mar 2006, 3:09 pm

Haha. i was reminded of an error you get on some comps where a message on the screen pops up in the bios stating to plug in the monitor.


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PeterMacKenzie
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17 Mar 2006, 4:00 pm

On a pack of Nytol; an antihistamine-based sleeping pill.

Quote:
WARNING: May cause drowsiness. If affected do not drive or operate machinery.


Well, I bloody hope so!


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17 Mar 2006, 4:27 pm

On Tesco value triffles.

On the bottom of the pack (as in, the side facing down) there is a warning on the label saying "Do not turn over!". By the time you would have seen this label it would have been a bit too late...



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17 Mar 2006, 4:35 pm

Are you an aspie (or NT im not a discriminator)Want to say your piece? Fed up with getting silly warning messages for just being the blunt aspie that you are? Well threat no more, join us at http://intensity.as4us.net/phpBB2/index.php , were 100% of our users are aspies who havent had any official warnings and were YOUR opinion counts.


THAT'S INTENSITY@ http://intensity.as4us.net/phpBB2/index.php

come and join us, we're here for you



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17 Mar 2006, 6:32 pm

A couple of years ago I bought some costumes for my cousin's birthday party (she's a kid) and one of them was a superman one for her little male friend. Inside the packaging was a notice for parents telling them 'this costume will not give your child the ability to fly', I found this mildly amusing.



Sparkle1984
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17 Mar 2006, 6:40 pm

odeon wrote:
"Click the button to change the point of view of the user." (Something I found when I worked as an editor at Ericsson.)


Did you have to translate the instruction manuals in your job?


I've got some of these funny warnings too:

On a blanket from Taiwan:NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.
On a helmet-mounted mirror used by U.S. cyclists:REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.
On a Taiwanese shampoo:USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavored milk drink:AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.
On a New Zealand insect spray:THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
In a US guide to setting up a new computer:TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TOWARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)
On a Japanese product used to relieve painful haemoroids:LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOLSLOWLY UP TO THE PROJECTED PORTIONLIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL DUCT.WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY5 MINUTES, KEEP QUIET. (Ouch!)
In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles:OPEN OTHER END.
On a packet of Sunmaid raisins:WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?
On a Sears hairdryer:DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.
On a bag of Fritos:YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY. DETAILS INSIDE.(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.
On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box):DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.
On a Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.
On a Korean kitchen knife:WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.
On a Japanese food processor:NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE. (Now I’m curious.)
On Sainsbury’s peanuts:WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts:INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.
On a Swedish chainsaw:DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.
On a child’s superman costume:WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.
On some frozen dinners:SERVING SUGGESTION: DEFROST.
On a hotel provided shower cap in a box:FITS ONE HEAD.
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.
On Boot’s “Children’s” cough medicine:DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.
On Nightly sleep aid:WARNING: MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.