Stop assuming how I am feeling

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I hate being misread. This guy I know keeps thinking I am being bashful and I am hiding something from him and I am not being completly honest with him. He also keeps thinking something is wrong with me or that I am mad when I am not. So irritating. Makes me wonder how often other people misread me but don't say anything.

Not sure if this is quite relative to what you're saying but something of a similar feeling irritates me in this way - yes, I am often down and scared senseless about stuff, but when I am up and strong, which is pretty often these days, I get the feeling others still think I'm not on top of my game, if this makes sense. Frustrating...

Yes, this is a 'pet peeve' of mind. NT: Do not insert meaning where it does not exist.

I hate when another operates with insufficient data, or no data, and then just 'decides.' What is that? They might be good, but they're not equpped with ESP! Sometimes, when I have been really quiet and seem 'far away' (because I'm in deep thought, formulating.....) another has 'assumed' I am moody. NO. I am not moody. Besides, when I am 'far away' emotions are not even existent. I do not mean to be offish to any other and I would hate that another would think I'm moody.

I have this problem too and it's quite irritating. How ironic it is that an Aspie typically isn't good at reading expressions, while at the same time, an Aspies expression is often misread by others.

I've had this problem before as well.

Tim

give pictures of whats inside your diapers to him. that will make anyone stop talking to you

I really hate this too, when people trying to analyze you and give you advice or criticize the way you act or live, like they're so much better. Typically the people who live their lives with contentment don't do this though.

In highschool I had a teacher for Maths C (Australian curriculum) who in one of the first lessons singled me out and playfully started saying "cheer up" "smile" etc. I had no idea what she was talking about, I was actually really far away in my head. That being said she did turn out to be a really nice person over the next few years. I also had a physics teacher who started to get really angry and explode at me for not paying attention and ruining his class, which I really thought made no sense, as usually I was sitting there doing nothing, though everybody else also thought it made no sense so maybe it wasn't me at all.

People often accuse me of being angry since I often look my avatar.
I'm usually not, that just my content face. Maybe my eyes will look narrowed because of the lighting or sun. My eyes are sensitive to bright light.

that is very annoying.
i always would get told to "calm down" when i am not panicking in the least. that would be just because of the fact that my hands always shake a bit for no reason at all.

I'm sorry that you are feeling misread.

I often smile when I don't feel happy. I'm not even aware that i'm doing it, but I have been told many times to "cheer up" so I guess it's just something I did to keep people from bothering me. Sometimes I look at myself in the mirror and am surprised that I have a smile on my face!

Anyway, I read the title of your post and immediately thought that this is probably what my son would be saying to me. He smiles when he is happy and cries when he is sad, but everything else, including anger, does not show on his face. So I find myself guessing and trying to understand him. I know I make a lot of assumptions, but I don't have much to go on. So as you can tell, reading emotions around here is a trainwreck all the way around.

I have issues making noises, or faces and I keep being asked "whatts wrong with you" or being told "why are you getting mad for?" and things of that sort when im just . . . i dunno standing there. Because my "tone" sounded mad or sarcastic or watever, i intone the words however they come out.



This happens to me too. I have tremmor issues. I shake and my body bucks sometimes and sometimes I just writhe and wriggle all over for no reason though sometimes I AM exited and hyper, sometimes I just want to read a book.

Oh, I do not like that either. People often ask me why I am angry or sad when I am just relaxed.. Sadly enought it seems like people cannot let me be alone the few times I am relaxed so I have to keep up some sort of tension around people all the time.

Typical conversation with NT's these times:
Them: "Are you angry?"
Me: "No, I am just relaxed. I feel really fine right now actually"
After a minute or so
Them: "You sure look angry, are you sure you are not angry?"
Me: "Yes, I am sure. I feel fine"
Them: "Are you sad then?"
Me: "No, I feel fine"
Silence..
Them: "Are you angry at me? Because if you are you can tell me"
Me: "I am not angry at you and if I was I would sure have told you from the beginning" By now my voice however sounds somewhat irritated..I just want to be left alone and enjoy the moment.
Them: "You sound irritated..are you sure you are not angry?"
Finally
Me: "I was not angry from the beginning but I am getting pretty irritated so I want you to leave me alone"
Them: "Oh, I knew you were angry!"

I admit i ask abit to people about how they are feeling becaue I can't tell. But thats usually to my gf, and not very often these days.

I do ask too but I accept the answer I get from the other person

I recognise the thing about that my voice sounds wrong. I can say hi to someone, sounding like a military.. This confuses me too since I sometimes hear it myself but cannot change it.

/Anna

Last edited by different on 06 Oct 2007, 8:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

My hands shake when I am hungry...and people always ask "why are you so anxious today"...when I am generally not.
Irritates me how people always assume that they know how you are feeling.