So How Do I Build My Niche Like This?

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I am not even feeling slightly nervous. I approach a girl and try to strike up a conversation with her. It's a beautiful day, and she's drawing under a tree. I say, "That's a good drawing," and she says, "Thank you," and then I said it was a great day, and she agreed. I told her again that I thought her drawing was great; she said thank you again; and that was it. I walked over to one of the benches to start poring over the readings for my world literature class since I have a test in it tomorrow. I really couldn't concentrate on studying, though, because I wasn't really in the mood.

While trying to study, I noticed a girl some ways away had glanced at me. After I finished skimming over Beowulf, I walked up to her and said, "It's too nice to do work," or something like that. She ended the conversation after I didn't say anything with, "Enjoy the rest of the beautiful day!"

Usually, if I haven't thought of some random joke, I don't have much to say at all. It's not because I'm feeling too nervous to speak; I'm just not coming up with things to say. I saw a guy walk up to the girl who was drawing and within a few minutes she, her friend, and the guy were all laughing and joking. Why can't I do this with people? I have trouble making much give-and-take conversation with anyone, no matter what type of person they are or what they're interested in or what they believe in. It makes it hard to generate a pool of friendships and build a real-life social niche/social support structure.

I usually rely on jokes I think of or something we can both relate to. If it's unusually nice out or the weather's unusually bad, I might mention that to get a conversation started. If they're doing something, I might ask a question about that or say something related to what they're doing. I often talk about assignments or things relating to a class if we're both in the same one.

So why do people leave me out and dismiss me just because I'm not much of a conversationalist? I can't recall often being invited to do things with other people. I really need to develop a good set of friendships.

It's because silence makes a lot of people feel uncomfortable.
Some people you meet however are true conversationalists, and they won't mind that you don't have anything to say, because they love to talk.
It's sort of a catch 22 though. Because you don't interact with a lot of people socially, it's hard to think of things to say. The more you interact with people the easier it becomes to just talk to someone and make some sort of connection. When I was at my last job, I got to a point where I felt pretty comfortable there interacting with all of the customers that would come in.I got to hear a lot of conversation, and participate a little bit. It was great, because I didn't have to talk for long usually so didn't usually have to worry about things getting personal. This did wonders for my ability to talk to new people. But I'm not in the habit anymore, and my natural tendency is just to ignore people and hope that they ignore me.

Have you ever worked a customer service job?
It might help you in some ways with what you are trying to do.