I want to but i don't.

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I'm in hectic relapse mode today. I don't wanna use but i'm going totally insane. For those wro don't know i'm a recovering crack and heroin addict. Help please

Sometimes I feel really down for no reason. The feelings pass although I realize that's not much of a consolation at the moment.

I know that feelings pass but waiting for that to happen is sometimes a real ugly mission. I attended a NA meeting tonight but felt to unconfident. It was like i was not there. I just wanted to find a way to detract from myself. But the only way i know how to do that is by using which is no longer an option. Thanks for your support. It means something that somebody knows that i'm suffering and is able to relate in some way.

This is a tough road to travel and I've been (am still) there. My DOC is meth. I want it nearly every day. I refer to my internal list of why I don't want to use anymore:

My partner, job, health, peace of mind... the list goes on. Don't have a list? Make one.
I also visualize meth as being one of my old supervisors. Then I visualize kicking the s**t outta her (I know- that's not very healthy, is it?) and in a way I'm kicking the s**t outta meth, too. Two birds with one stone... kinda.

Be tough. You are stronger than the drugs. I know it. You know it. Everyone knows it.

try playing some game/sosialize:) it should help i have a friend whos been there too^^ just dont take drugs it migth feel u get world best feeling but like they say "you play u pay" feelings pass

I can do it. I have a great support structure and i am living in recovery. But dam i wish i wasn't an addict. I wish i could just use drugs without getting carried away.

Everyone is an addict of something. It's just that ours is more pronounced and self-destructive. My partner's DOC is food, my boss uses work to escape from a loveless marriage. Everyone has their own issues so you are most definately not alone. I wish I wasn't an addict, OR have Asperger's OR make so little money OR a lot of things.

I hear ya, buddy.

No one can.

That is what makes them so insidious.

Stay strong. Stay strong.