Page 1 of 1 [ 15 posts ] 

Mum2ASDboy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jan 2008
Age: 48
Gender: Female
Posts: 560
Location: New Zealand

30 Aug 2008, 3:52 am

I need some ideas from you guys to help me with an embarrasing behaviour of D's. Most of the time when he get to a pedestrian crossing he puts his hand up to tell the cars to stop. I find this very embarrassing and see no need as the cars have actually stopped.
How can I get over this (I'm NT , D is HFA)



Magnus
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2008
Age: 49
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,372
Location: Claremont, California

30 Aug 2008, 4:09 am

Next question...



Erminea
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2008
Age: 54
Gender: Male
Posts: 9,083
Location: Holland

30 Aug 2008, 4:36 am

Right.



vt420
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2008
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 53
Location: Portage, MI, USA

30 Aug 2008, 4:43 am

not to be rude, but you really should just deal with it, it's not hurting anyone and he could be doing a lot worse things... i've seen seemingly NT kids do the same thing..

Jeff



tomamil
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2007
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,015
Location: Jeddah, Saudi Arabia

30 Aug 2008, 4:50 am

isn't he just thanking them for stopping? you didnt mention whether you tried to explain it to him.

btw, i do have hard time to see whether the car is going to stop even if they are evidently slowing down, i just wait until they stop completely. one can never be sure.

as your son cannot be sure that the car stays that way. he will grow over it.


_________________
Timeo hominem unius libri, I fear the man of one book, St. Thomas Aquinas.


Last edited by tomamil on 30 Aug 2008, 11:59 am, edited 1 time in total.

0_equals_true
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2007
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,038
Location: London

30 Aug 2008, 5:18 am

I do this sometimes. what is the problem? It is also customary to put you hand up to thank the driver for stopping. I think you should get over it. I was though this thread was going to be about something serious.

I remember when was with this girl and I tried hailing a taxi by sticking my thumb out. She was embarrassed and said in a huff, "Don't do that!" I asked her how might I hail a taxi. I burst out laughing as she proceeded to hail a taxi how you'd imagine the queen might, that's if the queen ever rode in a taxi. Don't be a princess. If you want him to be confident in himself don’t tell him he is doing something wrong when he isn’t.



Sora
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Sep 2006
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,906
Location: Europe

30 Aug 2008, 5:22 am

I wonder why he does it.

Does he thinks he must do it for some reason, does something scare him in that situation or does he just think it's a cool game? Can he tell you in some way or do you have an idea?


_________________
Autism + ADHD
______
The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it. Terry Pratchett


2ukenkerl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Jul 2007
Age: 64
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,248

30 Aug 2008, 9:17 am

I DO vaguely remember doing the same, just to attract attention, especially if not all the cars had stopped. You would be SURPRISED at what people would do! HECK, one day a jerk tried to run me off the road! He LITERALLY followed me on my bike. I later found it was a jerk student in my 3rd grade class.

You want EMBARRASING!?!?!? What about a jerk here that keeps CAPRICIOUSLY stepping out into the street, with NO light, and doing the same! SOMETIMES, he will even flash a VERY bright light into oncoming drivers to blind them! The jerk thinks his little colored suit will save him from his STUPIDITY! One person here recently got run over for doing at least something similar. Did I mention that they were over 30, and police officers? I mean I guess they figure getting run over is ok if someone can sue, or throw the other person in jail.

At least your son, presumably, gives the drivers adequate time beforehand!



prometheuspann
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 27 Aug 2008
Age: 53
Gender: Male
Posts: 320

30 Aug 2008, 9:27 am

Quote:
I need some ideas from you guys to help me with an embarrasing behaviour of D's. Most of the time when he get to a pedestrian crossing he puts his hand up to tell the cars to stop.


my hands go up because the chakras on my palms can be used as psi sensors.
maybe you are misreading him and asking him not to look as an aspie.
did you ever think of that?



Quote:
I find this very embarrassing and see no need as the cars have actually stopped.
How can I get over this (I'm NT , D is HFA)


Then you need to stop and stop and stop and think.
I assure you that NT behaviors are for more emberassing than that.


_________________
http://mytalktoday.com/solutions.invalid
My place PLEASE COME VISIT!!


makuranososhi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 May 2008
Age: 48
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,805
Location: Banned by Alex

30 Aug 2008, 11:05 am

Mum2ASDboy wrote:
I need some ideas from you guys to help me with an embarrasing behaviour of D's. Most of the time when he get to a pedestrian crossing he puts his hand up to tell the cars to stop. I find this very embarrassing and see no need as the cars have actually stopped.
How can I get over this (I'm NT , D is HFA)


Honestly, I see this as a non-issue... not sure what embarrassment would be caused thusly. It assures or comforts him on some level; is that really a problem? Just remember your needs are not his, and trying to make him conform in such a manner will not likely achieve the results desired.


M.


_________________
My thanks to all the wonderful members here; I will miss the opportunity to continue to learn and work with you.

For those who seek an alternative, it is coming.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!


Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2008
Gender: Male
Posts: 60,939
Location:      

30 Aug 2008, 11:09 am

Mum2ASDboy wrote:
I need some ideas from you guys to help me with an embarrasing behaviour of D's. Most of the time when he get to a pedestrian crossing he puts his hand up to tell the cars to stop. I find this very embarrassing and see no need as the cars have actually stopped.
How can I get over this (I'm NT , D is HFA)

First, realising that the problem is yours to deal with is a good start. Eventually you will overcome your need to prejudge, dominate, and control others.

Best wishes.



Followthereaper90
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Apr 2008
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,780
Location: finland

30 Aug 2008, 2:09 pm

lol thats not bad u should see what my friends do in drive in :lol:


_________________
followthereaper until its time to make a turn,
followthereaper until point of no return-children of bodom-follow the reaper


Jellybean
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 Apr 2007
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,795
Location: Bedford UK

30 Aug 2008, 2:46 pm

In England, holding your hand up means 'thanks'. I don't think you should worry too much because I have heard of kids who drop down in the middle of the road and scream. I have often said this to my Mum when I am behaving oddly, 'be thankfull you don't have to change my diapers!'


_________________
I have HFA, ADHD, OCD & Tourette syndrome. I love animals, especially my bunnies and hamster. I skate in a roller derby team (but I'll try not to bite ;) )


prillix
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 11 Aug 2008
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 322
Location: Phoenix Arizona

30 Aug 2008, 2:49 pm

Better for him to do that then do like me, and just cut right through the traffic.



LostInSpace
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Apr 2007
Age: 40
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,617
Location: Dixie

30 Aug 2008, 3:03 pm

I always do this to acknowledge that the cars have stopped. I also do this when I am driving to acknowledge when someone has let me go before them. I just think it is polite, so I don't see the problem.