So what is needed for you to connect to people?

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I find it hard to really connect to people, friends and family. I feel the need to go out there and be part of an activity, whether camping, bowling, tennis, or basically anything other then "Sit around and talk". With my closest friends, i could sit around and talk every once and a while, but i just sometimes need to go out and do something.

This has been the brick wall in my family. I tell my parents that all i want is for them to do stuff with me, show me that they have some interest in me, and yet they do not. Then they wonder why, on days like today, they're sitting on the deck with my moms friend and my brother, chatting the f**k away, while im sitting downstairs in my room, pitch black, while the sun is shining high and bright. They expect me to be Buddy-Buddy with them, when i've never felt them try to be buddy buddy with me.

I wouldn't be downstairs right now, if it was up to me, i would be out there, having fun with my friends. The downside is, its hard to find friends who dont wanna just sit around.

I got one friend whom i go to the bar every once and a while, its not too bad since we're going to drink and have fun.
I got another friend, who like me, likes going camping, quadding, etc etc, but he lives out of town and i rarely see him.
I got another friend, who every once and a while i convince her to do crazy stuff that i think would be fun, and she does em. She's very content with staying at home chilling out with her boyfriend most of the time, plus the fact that she hates this town as much as i do.
Last but not least, my best friend/cousin. I would do anything for this guy, but we've been hanging around together for so long that he must be bored of me, cause i tell em i wanna do s**t, and he doesnt (or it takes alot of convincing), then he turns around and does it with his "newer" friends. Also he taught my other friend how to drive standard, yet when a cop pulled em over and told him he couldn't drive without glasses, but i could drive for him, he refused and called his other cousin and waited an hour for some glasses, i wasnt worth the risk. Even though he knows how much it hurts me that my parents wont take me driving, and everytime they say no it feels like im worth less then "none of their time".


I know for a fact that this is due to my lack of my social skills, sooner or later i either run out of stuff to say and it makes me nervous, or i blurt out stupidities in hope of getting a laugh, which usually results in me looking like a total jerk.



So am i the only one who needs to be doing something with someone to feel connected?

I relate completely..

although im not proactive at all and I dont have anyone to do that kind of stuff with thats definately how I am.. the only differene is I dont like unpredictability, unless its my idea.. like i dont wanna be swept off somewhere like to someone's house where i feel awkward, which is why i hate being out driving with people that i dont trust.. I know what you mean about the sitting down and talking.. at my jobs the worst times are when i have to sit at the lunch table .. i dont like being interrogated about my life..

and your parents are dickheads and hypocrits for not understanding you.. I dont understand parents sometimes.. and this isnt because im a kid and have no greater parental perspective, its because parents dont know what they're doing these days..

hmmm....for me, something in common in interests, beliefs and activities helps..