Smalltalk, anyone flipped your switch?

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I know that smalltalk is a problem for most AS people. It's one thing just to sit and listen to the rubbish, but what if someone just happens to touch into a subject that you know a great deal about, in fact all about it? Before, I tended to grab the word, and preach the gospell so to say, leaving the smalltakers with something REAL to talk about. In some cases when it's kind of political, I can be a real flaming preacher, leaving the others both scared and confused. Sometimes I feel that the speach is coming from outside me, and afterwards I feel weak and shaky. Anyone had this feeling?

I think "small talk" is, by definition, a basically meaningless conversation that neither party is interested in.

If it's a subject you're interested in, then it's not small talk any longer.

Well I am bad at small talk. If you mean what I think you mean, if someone mentioned "SpongeBob SquarePants" I could probably talk about it like a genius.

of course!
I try not to be so preachy,
I'll say a "headeline" and if the people ask something about it or say something like "Oh, realy?" I will continue with a small lecture until the next "headeline",
if no one says anything I will stop. It's hard stopping yourself, but if I don't do that I bore people...

I don't think small-talk has anything to do with the content of what they're talking about anyway. Many social animals just make sounds back and forth for it's own sake, because they enjoy it and that's what they do. (I'm thinking about birds chirping here) I think just because they can, people also inject ulterior content into the activity, for some self-fulfilling purpose or another. We just tend to focus on the ulterior content, so maybe that's why they act like, "Um, what are you doing?" if we run up and tell them what's what.

Small talk has it's redeeming qualities.
1) It's kinda like fishing: When in a group of strangers, it can eventually lead into more relevant conversations.
2) It helps to quickly ascertain who you would rather spend time conversing with in the future.
3) It can help to alleviate tension (like when you're meeting people for the first time, or diffusing an argument). After all, not everything has to be heavy and thought-provoking.
4) Finally, it helps you to understand your conversation partner(s) better by gently feeling out where their interest lie.

While I find the process exhausting and rather predictable, I have become something of a small talk savant. Besides, most people are incredibly ego-centric: They like to have people ask them questions so they can talk about themselves and their own interests. I find that my half of the conversation is relatively easy by posing a few questions that are focused on my partners' interests rather than my own. People just loooove to talk about their new car, or the game that was on last Sunday or their new baby. All I really do is listen and nod- like a bobblehead.

I hear that.

Yes, I do get into conversations if someone is saying something interesting. I talked to one of my online friends on the phone and he told me great stories about his childhood. Few of them sounded out of place but he is schizo so I wouldn't say he is lying. He probably thinks they really happened or his speech is just incoherent, a schizo sign.

The thing about good conversation is that it involves equal parts listening and talking. Sometimes the scales might tip one way or t'other (which is natural) but as people with Asperger's we need to always be diligent about listening to what other people find interesting and not just talking about what interests us.

It is in that respect that we are, in fact, no different from our "NT" peers. All people like to talk about things that interest them. My mom loves to talk about her gardening and stained glass. I find the former of the two utterly boring but I spend gratuitous amounts of time listening to her because she enjoys sharing her knowledge about them.
My dad loves to talk about cars- is perhaps the most knowledgable person in the country when it comes to antique vehicles. This topic can put me in a coma. Still, I listen because it's what he enjoys sharing.

Ask yourself: What am I getting out of talking about my favorite subject or interest?
That is probably the same thing everyone else aspires to when you're talking to them.

Yeah I am the same way. If small talk happens to wander into something I care a great deal about, then suddenly I do great. For example if someone talks about their pets, I am an animal/pet fanatic and am then truly interested in what they have to say. In fact I often judge people based on what they say about their pets in that situation, which I guess is sort of wrong in a way