i am a prisoner in my ownlife

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i am neither good at what i do nor do i have friends or enjoy life.i have no interest in anything in life.my life is boring where i have to work a lot hard each day but dont get anything in return.i am a prisoner in my own life.what am i to do with my life?

Sounds like you haven't found a special interest.
I'm sorry

An AS person without a special interest can be very lost indeed.
You'll probably find it someday, though!!

Your curent life is whatever you have made of it.
Your future life will be whatever you will make of it.

You have the freedom to choose your own path; use it.

It's the new year.

Assess your life and make changes to better it.

For me, part of my problem is attitude, and the other part is not so much what I'm doing but how I'm doing it.

Life is a kind of prison sentence, but you have to serve your time here. Some people forget that and actually enjoy their time here and sometimes it's necesary to do that in order to pass the time more quickly. It's a prison sentenct for non autistics too.

mate, you have got to find a way to be happy here and there. i am not as confident as fnord is, about each individual's capacity to self-determine happiness, but i do believe there are contributions we can make to increase our experiences of happiness.

1. exercise. simple. and under-rated. AS or not...get yor endorphines happening in the brain and body. it makes a huge difference.
I get suicidal a great deal, and exercise is very good. (it is phenomenal how many people complain about depression and how bad it is but never get off the couch. i had t olearn the hard way to partake in exercise. it works. start by walking out he front door to the front gate.
2. thinking processes. have you worked at reformatting how you think? all humans need to tweak these here and there, particularly if there is a tendency toward negativity.

i am suspecting there is, from the way you have worded your post.

good luck.

Last edited by millie on 07 Jan 2009, 3:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.

In addition, I found the book "Feeling Good" by David Burns to be extremely enlightening and useful for depression.
Might want to check it out.

mitharatowen has a GOOD point! When I found out about AS, I embraced an interest, and my depression got MUCH better. Since I get sidetracked, etc... I am not NEARLY as good as I should be, but it still helps. I don't TRULY enjoy life, but there IS a gulf between enjoyment and despair. I have few people I would call friends. I don't live near ANY of them. 8-( If you can get a job in your interest, and limit what you do in your job, you will be VERY happy!

I'll second that. If you can turn an interest into an hobby into a paid job life can be good. I still write software just for the hell of it after twenty five years of programming and still get a kick out of it and it has paid my salary for that time.
Next life I'll get a job as a botanist and travel the world collecting specimens - or maybe that was my previous life I can't remember

Special interest + getting paid for doing it = happiness.

Isn't everyone a prisoner to something or someone? But yeah, i have the same problem. Nothing interests me. I don't know what fun is. Most people I know say drinking is fun, but I disagree. Video games aren't as fun as they used to be. And basketball gets old after a while. So I'll find something, like doing good in the world, if I can figure out how. I still have lots of years of life ahead of me to figure it all out. And so do you OP.

yep. we're all pretty much serving a life sentence in prison.

don't know enough about you to give valid advice, but oh well, here goes anyway...

if it is possible for you to save a little money - enough for a month or two - maybe you should consider quitting your job. a bad job will make even the most well adjusted person miserable. can you look around for another job? maybe you've worked hard enough for long enough. time for a change.

people say life is short but i think it is way too long. whatever legal thing you can find that makes time go by faster may help a lot. a short trip to a place you'd rather be? buy a magazine or book? beer? keep a journal?

everybody is good at something, perhaps you have forgotten or don't know yet what it is. usually what people love to do, they are good at. or maybe you are one of those people who can do anything, like a jack of all trades?

do you have allergies or on medication? either of those could be causing you to feel like crap.

i continually ask myself the same question - what am i to do with my life? staying in the middle between a good life and a bad life is perfect. that's what i try for. i don't enjoy being yanked from one extreme to the other. but you may be happier with the extremes because they are less boring. for me life is mostly boring even though i've got lots of interests. Tai Chi has been especially helpful in calming me down. have you tried a martial art? or acupuncture?

i am just the same.

i have well above normal iq, am talented, but live in this foul cage of a/s; i hate noise, light, find it hard and exhausting to be around other people. i live on benifits, live alone. having a special interest or new hobby makes bugger all difference or help- it is only papering over the cracks.
i think each day of killing myself- i am 35, and hvae no boyfriend even- i want to marry and hvae chaildren, but would not even be able to share a bedroom with someone, let alone a bed. i want to hvae friends, but find ity hard to socialize.
i cant work because i cant be around people, i cant run my own business since i often cant speak, and cant think stright a lot of the time.

collecting stamps or seomthing is really not going to help me make sense of my pointless existance.

even the charity work i hvae been doing for a couple of days a week will soon end because i have been badly bullied about my a/s by a series of other people and managers; i have tried to find similar work else where, but no one will allow me to work alone, so i cant, since i cant be in the same room as other people.

i have masses of hobbies etc- my life is stdill s**t and pointless and empty. i never go out, i have no freinds, i never speak to anyone; if i died this evening, noone would know until my decomposing corpse began to smell.
collecting stuff and having special interests really makes bugger all difference.

i appreciate a/s is a spoectrum disorder; i find it incomprehensibe- because of my lack of imagination from a/s- taht anyone with it can have any kind of normal life- i live in a cage because of it.
its not depression- its a worthl;ess existance. i do nothing, and hvae no future.

apu 2mi bolesila na j 1somoy 2mi class er top student chila....pore erokom hoise....amaro serokom hoisilo....ami tokhn suicide er attempt o nislam...amr gota life sei somoy elomelo hoye silo...amr asolei kono frnd silo na....ebong ekhn jara ase tara tokhonkar amk kokhonoi bujhbe na...amr tokhonkar situation ar 2mr situation 1dom same..

ami thik sure na ami buetian bole 2mi jealous kina bt situation ta same...ami lucky silam karon sei somoy just hothat kore ami math olympiad ar informatics olympiad e 1sathe national e chance peye gesilam...tokhon ami setakei khorkuto hisabe akre dhoresilam...tokhon i 1st mone hoisilo j ami parbo...bt ei luck ta emni emni ase nai...etar jonno amk nijer opor onek experiment chalate hoise...jokhon j competition ba subject paisi setai pari ba na pari try korar chesta koresi...sobai tokhon amk 1ta callas ar worthless vabto j sob kisu try kore bt kisui pare na...bt shes porjonto ami peresi...

2mkeo serokom nijeke nie onek onek experiment korte hobe...jodi 2mi eta na koro tahole 2mi bachte parba na....hoy pagol hoye jaba ar nahole suicide korba...2mi jodi sotti aspie hou tahole bishash koro 2mr ei experiment chalanor moto ability ase...NTra nijeder nie eto experiment korbe parbe na..bt 2mi ami parbo...eta amader speciality...plz venge poro na...

Where's the original poster who wanted to talk?

I have had problems periodically with these feelings. I'll feel like things are going ok for a while and then suddenly I feel lost, lonely, and just flat out depressed. I think you will find some interests and snap out of it. Am currently wishing I would snap out of it! It is very hard when you feel like you don't have any friends, but I know things will turn around, for both of us.

We all go through feelings like that, but one day you will find your interest and you also have to change your way of thinking (as it is not easy, it takes practice), you can always turn your dreams into reality and don't have to be a prisoner forever.