Getting served last, amongst a group at a restaurant.

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This is the most excruciating group dining experience ever, and it's happened to me twice in the past 6 months. While all the NTs eat and chat, you are stuck there, waiting a long time for your food. I feel exeptionally un-sociable when I'm hungry and can't get any food. If you're wondering how I can eat while in a group at all, it's connected to a common interest in which I'm respected by NTs (although the first time this happened, I had just met the Nts - not gonna do that again!).

Maybe the next time, where I know I'll be in a situation in which I have the opportunity to eat with a group I'm with, I might just pre-pack a lunch and eat it outside while studying or something. Or at least be ready to leave with my pre-packed lunch, if I happen to be stuck waiting again. Would that second option be the most openly-aspie thing one could do? Might the NTs (who I do consider as friends) be bothered or embarrassed by it? I need to find some solution, because this is pure hell.

This has happened to me too.

Order some appetizers.

I'm with you, when I'm hungry or I suppose uncomfortable in general I will absolutely shut down and I feel I can't socialize at all. It's awful, yeah I'd say order an appetizer if possible, although sometimes it takes them awhile to get that around at some restaurants I've noticed.

When I am ignored, I stop going to that place. I used to work in a restaurant and I made sure I at least acknowledged the customers.

1. You should make sure when ordering by checking with the waiter that your choice from the menu doesn't take a lot longer than the rest of the choices.

2. If everyone at your table is eating and your dinner is nowhere to be found, and you haven't been given an explanation and apology about what's going on, then the restaurant is at fault and must compensate you with a free dinner to be redeemed at another time.

3. If you've called the waiter's and the manager's attention to the fact that everyone was served long ago and you're still empty-plated and they didn't do anything about it, you should make a big deal out of it and your friends should be talking to the manager too. It's totally unacceptable that your friends be put in the situation to have to eat while you're not eating.

Sounds like you're not very aware of your rights as a customer, which used to be the case with me due to my NLD.

that crap happens to me a lot!! ! they then are all done and i am just getting my food. then they all watch as i scarf... sucks especially because i get enough social anxiety as it is.

Sounds suspicious.....


I'm not sure as to why one would be ignored while others get their meals unless it has something to do with your meal taking longer or them ordering appetizers before a meal or maybe the waiter doesn't even notice you're there b/c your quiet?

I think I'd follow through Greentea's suggestion.

YOU SHOULD NOT PUT UP WITH IT IN SILENCE ! !! ! Take it from me, who was a cuckhold for 4 decades of my life. NOT ANYMORE. Customers have rights and must speak up. The only raason the people eating with you don't alert you to your rights is they prefer to have the party in peace FOR THEMSELVES by sacrificing YOU. They are bad friends. If the people dining with me objected to me asserting my rights with the waiter/manager, I'd get up and leave them. For good. I'd only shut up if I was with people from work.