Do you like parties? Plan a WP party...

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Do you like parties?
No 13%  13%  [ 9 ]
No 13%  13%  [ 9 ]
Yes 9%  9%  [ 6 ]
Yes 9%  9%  [ 6 ]
Only if there is someplace to be out of the way 23%  23%  [ 16 ]
Only if there is someplace to be out of the way 23%  23%  [ 16 ]
parties? is that, like candy? 1%  1%  [ 1 ]
parties? is that, like candy? 1%  1%  [ 1 ]
Don't know - have never been to one 1%  1%  [ 1 ]
Don't know - have never been to one 1%  1%  [ 1 ]
Other 3%  3%  [ 2 ]
Other 3%  3%  [ 2 ]
Total votes : 70

Neuroman
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18 Dec 2005, 10:00 pm

Given that many of us have some degree of difficulty in social situations, and that a subset of those folks would like to be able to engage socially, what would a compromise look like?
A Wrong Planet party, of course.
Seriously, what would make you comfortable enough to enjoy a social occasion with WP members or other like-minded folks?
I am looking for serious answers; I offend people at parties by reading a book while they are socializing. So I wonder if a WP party would have folks sitting with their notebooks or paper books or portable video games and thereby defeating the purpose of a social gathering?
What's your idea of a party where you would be comfortable? I'll have to think about this one myself.


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18 Dec 2005, 10:03 pm

Let's try it!!

I'm in.....

Wait how will I get there? Hmm....



hale_bopp
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18 Dec 2005, 10:21 pm

If I went to one, poeple probably wouldn't like me. I have a hard time relating to other aspies.



nirrti_rachelle
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18 Dec 2005, 10:24 pm

I would make sure to include board games and have people bring their Xboxes, Playstations and Gamecubes with them. People would have so much fun playing games that talk would come easier. I know this works for me as I tend to be less anxious if there's some activity going on that takes some of the focus off of my behavior. I think this is the very reason why I hate parties because there's nothing fun to do and my idea of enjoyment isn't chit-chatting or drinking.

Oh, and I would make sure there was plenty of good food, and not just paltry snacks. I'm talking pizzas, hot wings, tacos, hamburgers and other stuff that's supposed to be "bad" for you and let people, for once, forget that enjoying food is apparently a felony punishable by scorn and rejection. :roll: Oh, for those on gluten/casien-free diets, I would provide alternatives that taste as good as junk food yet keep them from having a reaction.

I would include music that's not turned up loud enough to make your ears bleed and unless the majority wants to, there would be no dancing. There would be access to computers available for internet or game play and a room that's made like a spa with candles (not scented), low light, comfy couches, books and "stimmy toys" so if people wanted to read or have quiet time to recover from overstimulation can escape. This way, they won't have to worry about leaving early or being tortured while waiting for their NT partner who hasn't had enough "fun" yet.


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18 Dec 2005, 10:52 pm

Yes! Laying out a structure, and outline, so that us aspies would know what to expect, and also laying those guidelines;
games
no dancing
soft music + lighting

... would be the ideal way to plan the aspie-party.

Personally, I can't think in terms of time passing; what's here in front of me now is, as far as I know, what's going to be there forever. The only way I can DO things, and not be lost in space, is to write down a schedule and follow it.

my 2 cents.



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18 Dec 2005, 11:24 pm

What a great idea! How about arcade style stations with the various game systems, and seating that allows the players their choice of noisy vs quiet audience. Roomy chairs, a variety of food and snacks that accomodate special diets. Hm. If we want to include everyone, we have to have two parties. One would be alcohol free. BOTH would be smoke and fragrance free - that's too hard to manage.
Stim rooms.
Nap rooms.
A reading room.
A traditional party room with too loud music and a mosh pit.
And for the old fogeys like me, an oldies party hour with at least one rendition of the Electric Slide and at least one line dance.
Noise cancelling earplugs for those who need them.
Cool shades for those who need them.
And a "post" system - everyone you converse with gives you a "badge" and at the end of the party the top 10 (do you think 10 people would come?) get prizes - a medal and a document certifying them as an official expert socializer. Everyone else gets a plain socializer certificate and a button that says "I socialized at the WP party and all I got was this stupid button!"
More fantasizing to come...


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18 Dec 2005, 11:25 pm

hale_bopp wrote:
If I went to one, poeple probably wouldn't like me. I have a hard time relating to other aspies.
You can have a private stim room...


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18 Dec 2005, 11:27 pm

I would really need name tags so that I could see name written. It would also be great if there was some way to notify anyone that you did talk to when the conversation needed to end.

Y


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18 Dec 2005, 11:28 pm

nirrti_rachelle wrote:
Oh, and I would make sure there was plenty of good food, and not just paltry snacks. I'm talking pizzas, hot wings, tacos, hamburgers and other stuff that's supposed to be "bad" for you and let people, for once, forget that enjoying food is apparently a felony punishable by scorn and rejection. :roll: Oh, for those on gluten/casien-free diets, I would provide alternatives that taste as good as junk food yet keep them from having a reaction.
Thanks you. There is a growing body of research suggesting that gluten and casein are major contributors to symptoms associated with autism. I have celiac disease and am lactose intolerant. I'm coming to your party!
I also have a huge collection of board games and like them for the same reason - takes the focus off conversation and behavior.


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19 Dec 2005, 12:04 am

yealc wrote:
I would really need name tags so that I could see name written. It would also be great if there was some way to notify anyone that you did talk to when the conversation needed to end.

Y


easier done than said.

your name badges would have lights on em. a simple push o the button and the back ground would light up and say something like, "i need to be alone right now."
Or they can be those mood generating color changing do hickys. where when you get lost in space or are overloaded it turns green. Your biult in excuse.

And at least the people at the party would understand. Excusing yourself wouldn't be the greatest socially rude act ever.


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19 Dec 2005, 12:46 am

yealc wrote:
I would really need name tags so that I could see name written. It would also be great if there was some way to notify anyone that you did talk to when the conversation needed to end.

Y
Oh, so easy. Same strategy as is CCG: "That ends my turn." when you are done speaking, and "Game over." when you want to stop 8)
This would be more truthful, yes?


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hale_bopp
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19 Dec 2005, 4:03 am

Quote:
there would be no dancing.


What? No way! Dancing is awesome!

My party would be heaps of music, heaps of tasty drinks (not poison tasting ones), a beach, a swimming pool, a few things do do indoors if people want. NO computers, the whole point is to socialise.

Oh, and heaps of yum food.



Sanityisoverrated
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19 Dec 2005, 4:26 am

I would feel more comfortable if I had an actual role to perform instead of just mindlessly wandering around chatting. So could I provide security or bartend or something? ...Or I could be the official wallet inspector?



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19 Dec 2005, 8:09 am

Neuroman wrote:
So I wonder if a WP party would have folks sitting with their notebooks or paper books or portable video games and thereby defeating the purpose of a social gathering?
What's your idea of a party where you would be comfortable? I'll have to think about this one myself.


No, no, no. Like all predictable Aspie interaction, we would bring our laptops, someone would of course provide a router, and we'd all converse that way. Sitting in the same room but still talking to each other via laptops, hehe.

--We'd bring food and music of course, too.


:lol: :lol: :lol:

yealc wrote:
I would really need name tags so that I could see name written.


Even better than that, we'd have nametags AND tags with pictures of our avatars on them. :D


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19 Dec 2005, 8:13 am

I think that if you had a room fulla people who were all aware of each others social problems that they'd be comfortable walking up to them and asking them strait out s**t like, "Hi, what do you suppose is the best way to arrange these social interactions?"

If we asked this around we'd find what were all comfortable with, we'd also probably touch upon various interests of people. It is a lot more comforting to know the person isn't going to stare wide eye'd at you like you were an alien and probably just try to scurry away.


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19 Dec 2005, 8:33 am

sounds ghastly! i'll have my own room, where i can smoke and drink and play my own music, ta. hale bopp, you can come and dance, if you like (and any other dancers), as i'd be dancing like mad as often as possible. and it'd be dark, and loud and have a comfy chair for me - for drink/fag breaks.