childhood questions

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I am now unfortunately estranged from my parents, so the only family members I am really close to are my aunt and uncle. They were a very important part of my life growing up, as they took care of us kids when my parents couldn't.

Anyway, I don't have a whole lot of memories from my childhood, but considering I am going next month to talk to an Asperger's expert, I feel I should start asking my aunt some questions about my childhood.

Besides language delay and special interests, what other childhood issues would be important to know about? I need to cover all bases but I am at a loss as to what questions to ask her!

I want to be fully prepared when I go to see this doctor, because unlike the prick psychiatrist I went to see last month, this person actually is an expert in the field and I want to have done all my homework on my childhood when I show up.

Thanks...

I'm going through various assessments with my son, so I can offer an idea of the kind of thing I'm being asked about and the kind of behaviours that are being observed with my son.

Motor skills - how were you with catching a ball, playing physical games involving balance and co-ordination, how easily and when did you learn to ride a bicycle, go a swing on your own?

Eating - were you a picky eater, did you prefer some food textures, colours, tastes to others? Did you need to have foods placed separately on your plate? Did you eat chewy foods or prefer soft foods?

Personal space - did you tend to get too close to people when you were talking to them? Did you talk over people or not realise when it was the other person's turn to speak or when the conversation was finished or had to pause? (My son will keep talking when getting into the car, even though he knows that I have to close his door, walk round and get in my side). Did you grab people and squeeze them, especially their arm or leg?

Rules - did you make up games with complicated sets of rules which were difficult for others to understand and get angry and frustrated when your game wasn't played "properly" by others, adults or children? Did you apply rules sometimes inappropriately, not understanding that circumstances change and rules also can change?

Personal care - did you need to be reminded over and over to do such things as washing hands before eating and after using the toilet? Were you obsessive about one aspect of personal care and cleanliness and lax about other aspects?

Socialising - did you get on better with younger children and adults as opposed to children your own age? When with other children did you play with them, beside them, or go off on your own? Did you seek the company of other children, but not know how to play with them?

Stimming - did you have any stims? These could range from the obvious headbanging, flapping and rocking to less obvious ones like staring at lights or water, spinning wheels on toys, chewing the inside of your cheek or sucking your tongue.

School reports and parents meetings - did your teachers comment on any problems with concentration and focus, lack of interest in some subjects and great interest in others? Were you quiet in class or did you shout out if you knew an answer? How did you behave when you got out of school?

Um...that's all I can think of right now. I hope that helps.

Good luck!

You should also ask your aunt more generally if she can remember ways in which you seemed unusual, or different from other children.

Hi SBCMetroGuy,

I am in a similar situation - I no longer have any contact with my parents and am going for my assessment next week with a knowledgable professional. Her preferred method of assessment would be to interview someone like a parent who knew me when I was growing up. However, as that won't happen, I will take the interview myself.

Since booking my appointment six weeks ago, I have made a point to try to recall as much from childhood - general difficulties, specific events, habits and interests - and write them down. I do this at different times of the day and as events or even songs I hear trigger latent memories. I am most effective, not surprisingly, when alone in quiet places. On the train ride up to the assessment, I will make a final review of my recollections and re-live as many as possible, at the risk of weirding out other travellers.

Talk to me in a week to see how it worked out.

Anyway, good luck to you.

Marcia,

Thank you for this - I will find this helpful for next week.

Oh this is excellent, thank you! This is so great, because most of these I can definitely say I recall from my childhood.

I did learn to ride a bicycle, though I do remember having training wheels for a long time. I never was good at riding my bicycle, but I did love it nonetheless. I remember one morning I was riding my bike down the street and I crashed into someone's mailbox on the side of the road. I had all that concrete to ride on, and somehow I ended up destroying a mailbox! How did I manage that!? lol I was a horribly clumsy child. I sucked at sports, I couldn't play basketball to save my life even though I tried hard to do it so I could fit in ... never happened.



Yes and I am still this way. I have always been a picky eater and certain foods I simply can't even get near. I have never wanted my foods to touch unless they were supposed to go together, like mashed potatoes with gravy. I love Chinese food and could eat it for every meal. When I go to a Chinese buffet, I am very particular how I place the foods on my plate. I also am very artsy with it, as if I'm preparing it for a customer. I organize the different dishes on my plate in a very aesthetic manner. I am very creative with it.



When I was a child I had this problem, though it's not as bad now that I am an adult. Some people still will look at me out the corner of their eyes and say, "dude, I can't breathe!" But it's not nearly as bad as when I was a child. One thing that made it worse was my clumsiness. When I'd be walking beside a friend I would already be standing too close, and then I would often stumble into him because I was so clumsy. And yes, unfortunately, I have always talked over people. I still do that even at the office, though I have worked on it so it's not as bad.



I did have to be reminded to wash my hands, and I did have to be reminded to brush my teeth, shower, etc. But I was obsessive about wiping after using the bathroom, and about wiping my face after meals. I am still obsessive about both of these issues, actually. But now I am also obsessive about floosing my teeth. I spend about a half hour flossing and cleaning my teeth every evening before going to bed. This is something I certainly never did as a child.



In the email I started writing to my aunt this morning I told her about how most of my friends were younger than me and some of their parents didn't like me being friends with their kids because I was so much older. But at the same time, I felt closer to some of my other friends' parents than I did to the kids themselves.



I did bang my head a lot when I was younger, but I don't remember at what age this started. I remember being aware of it in junior high school, but I don't remember when it started or when it ended. I also obsessively chew my nails, and have many other Tourette's tics as well. And while I don't suck my tongue, I have always chewed on the inside of my cheek. As a child I would often chew sores onto the insides of my cheeks. I didn't know what was considered a type of stimming.



My parents didn't attend school meetings, but I did always get in trouble for not paying attention in class. Spelling was the only subject I ever really enjoyed in school but I always made straight A's in that class, while I failed everything else. In junior high and high school, my favorite courses were spelling, band, drafting, and wood shop. All my major academic classes I failed miserably at. I was very meek in school, always quiet in class. I never wanted to be the person called on in class, even if I knew the answer. I was way too shy.

This is great, I can relate to all this so now I know some more things I need to focus on. Thank you.

Believe it or not, she has always told me how unusual I seemed as a child. She mentions that I always talked differently from most children. She said she never understood how I could have made such bad grades in school, yet had such a grown-up way about me. She said I always sounded older than I was. I told her that in my research, this is something that has always stood out to me, because it's often a sign of AS and it's something I've always had. Plus the fact that I could close myself in my bedroom and draw buildings and houses when I had never been given any architectural training at that age. And now, I've been working for 9 years in a position where I design and draw house plans everyday.

Thank you, I am glad someone else is in a similar situation with the lack of contact with parents. You know, a few months ago when I was first thinking about seeing a professional I actually hand-wrote an 8-page report about everything that I could think of that was odd about me. But I was embarrassed that I had written all that out and I didn't want the doctor to think I was a total idiot, so I ended up throwing it all away. Since I have 1 month until I go in to see her, I just might take the time to write another list out.

There are sets of questions on childhood in the Australian Scale for Asperger's Syndrome (ASAS):

http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/aspergerscaleAttwood.html

Thank you, I forgot about that resource!

So? How did the assessment go? Just curious....

Wow, I forgot all about this thread! Ultimately I was diagnosed with atypical Asperger's and multiple types of ADHD. I actually have a therapy appointment this Thursday at my psychologist's office and we will discuss medications and such at that time as well.

WELL, I can't catch.



YEP, sometimes, yep!



THEY get too close to me. YEP. NOPE!



NOPE.



NOPE, I am too clean.



YEP! on my own! YEP!



YEP!



YEP! QUIET. SAME!

lol... are those considered stims...
I still do the staring...

Also, don't forget about any sensory issues you may have had as a child. That could help the professional diagnose AS, too.
-OddDuckNash4348-